Volume II Part 3 (1/2)
”I wish all the candles and the cards were down your throat,” he cried; ”nearly all the wine is there already I wish they'd choke you I wish they were all in the pit of your sto coals What shall I do with you, you cadaverous little jackanapes? The Lout did well this --” (I was the Lout, by your leave) ”to--to liken thee to one, for thou artmy cassock, I'd--I'd--”
He advanced towards hi his fist, as well as I could see, as he approached Surely there never was such a comical character as this Bartholoed parson caain on his marrowbones, just as I had seen hi up his little skinny hands towards the ceiling, begins yelling and bawling out louder than ever
”Spare my life! spare my life!” he cried, ”Take my watch and trinkets
Take my Gold Medal of the Pearl of Brunswick Club Take the diareat Steenkirk on Sundays Go to ot in the world Turn e spare ive a hundred Pounds to Lady Wackerbarth's charity school I want to do every body good Takeentleman out of the hands of a murtherous Chaplain”
”Why, you craven cur, you,” puts in the Chaplain, bending over him with half-poised fist, yet with a kind of half-amuse Man, as you call hilish lad who saved your worthless little carcass fro, and whom you offered to recoive him forty pound, I will,” blubbered Mr Pinchin, still on his knees ”I'll give him fifty pound when my Midsummer rents co lion Oh,ood-huentles Don't be afraid, Squire Barty _He_ won't murder you”
I advanced in obedience to the su a hand under either armpit of the Squire, helped him on to his feet Then, at a nod of approval, I set hireat arm-chair of Utrecht velvet Then I pointed to the bottle on the table, and looked at Mr Hodge, as though to ask whether he thought a glass of Burgundy would do the patient good
”No,” said the Chaplain ”He's had enough Burgundy He'd better have a flask of chaive hine, Squire?” he continued, addressing his patron in a strangely authoritative voice
”Yes,” quoth the littlewas all Awry, and who looked, on the whole, a e”
”Vastly pretty! And what aundy”
”Any thing,” murmured the discomfited Squire; ”only spare er _We'll_ take good care of it And this lish youth,--will your Honour offer him no refreshment?
What is he to have?”
”Can he drink beer?” asked the Squire, in a faint voice, and averting his head, as though the having to treat me was too much for hi athis head meanwhile, as if to warn e
”It's very cheap,” added Mr Pinchin, very plaintively ”It isn't a farthing a glass; and when you get used to it, it's better for the inwards than burnt brandy Have a glass of beer, good youth Kind Mr
Hodge, let the your faro! I don't like it,” I said, bluntly
”What will you have, then?” asked the Squire, with a gasp of agony, and his head still buried in the chair-cushi+on
It seemed that the Chaplain's lips, as he looked atthe letters W I N E So I put a bold front upon it, and said,
”Why, I should like, undy with this good Gentleundy,” whimpered Mr Pinchin, half to the chair-cushi+on, and half to his periwig ”He will have Burgundy The ragged, tall young ht livres ten sols the flask Oh, let him have it, and let me die! for he and the Parson have sworn toSlers, and Papistry, and Landlords who have sworn to ruinat once so ludicrous, and yet so Pathetic, in the little h or to cry His feelings seemed so very acute, and he his, that it was almost Barbarity to jeer at him The Chaplain, however, was, to all appearance, accusto to me that it was all Mr
Pinchin'sGentleman meant no harm, he bade me bestir myself and hurry up the servants of the House to serve supper
So not only were the chaundy put on table,--and of the which there was put behind a screen a de (”And the Squire will be pleased, when he comes to Audit the score, to find that you have been content with Half a bottle 'Twill see saved out of the Fire,”
whispers the Chaplain toWaters and sweet Liquors and cordials provided, especially that renowned stos are so outrageously fond, and which is made to such perfection in the Batavian settlements in Asia, but a substantial Repast likewiseFowl, both wild and tas, baked in a Standing Crust, some curious fresh sallets, and one of potatoes and salted herrings flavoured with garlic--to me most villanously nasty, but much affected in these aht to with a copious draught of chane,--and he was thehis ever-dry throttle froht,--he and the chaplain sate down to supper, and reht So far as the Parson's part went, it ht have been called a Carouse as well as a Feast, for his Reverence took his Liquor, and plenty of it, with a joviality of Countenance the which it would have done your Heart good to see, drinking ”Church and King,”
and then ”King and Church,” so that neither Institution should have cause to gru the Arland, New the Jockeys, the pious memory of Dr Sacheverell, at which the Squire winced soant and appropriate sentiments In fact, it was easy to see that his reverence had known the very best of company, and when at one of the clock he called for a Bowl of Punch, which he had taught the Woman of the House very well how to brew, I put him down as one who had sate with Lords,--ay and of the Council too, over their Potations But the Behaviour of Bartholo unto the end of the Regale, of a piece with his forne, he essayed to sing a song to the tune of ”Cold and Raw,” but, failing therein, he began to cry Then did he accuseof a Capon, which, I declare, I had seen him devour not Five Minutes before Then he had more Drink, and proposed successively as Toasts his Cousin Lady Betty Heeltap, daughter to my Lord Poddle; a certain Madame Van Foorst, who Ridotto on the Port at Antwerp; then the Jungfrau, or serving wench that waited upon us, who had for name Babette; and lastly his Maan to load with Abuse, declaring that she wished to have her Barty shut up in a ht enjoy his Lands and Revenues And then he fell to co that it would Ruin hi his old co ht with hilish Resident at Brussels for a Jacobite spy, tells e, the best friend he ever had in the world, and falls down at last stupefied Whereupon, with the assistance of the Flemish Drawer, I carried my new master up to bed