Chapter 381 - Guilt (2/2)
The way he felt just looking at her was in truth very alien to him as an a.d.u.l.t man. He had only ever felt something similar as a young boy with a relentless crush on the queen bee at his private school.
She never once acknowledged him, though, and then she left one summer, never to return again. He had gotten word that she and her family had relocated to America. His friends taunted him brutally that day, but he brushed it all off bravely, only to go home and weep inconsolably.
Mei Mei Chung had been the one who found him when she came to tell him his father needed him in the home office. He had comforted him as best as she could, telling him there would be lots of girls to catch his fancy when he was much older.
In later years, she would blame herself for setting him on the wrong path, because he appeared to have taken that promise a little too seriously and now, he was having affairs all over the place.
When he once got wind of her guilt feelings, he assured her she was not to blame for anything. This was just how he had chosen to live his life and it was working just fine for him.
He could have all the fun he wanted but without any of that emotional baggage that had threatened to crush him years before.
But not with Amy. Not with his Red. This one tugged at his heart strings by merely existing. He thought back to sometime earlier in the week during one of his myriad meetings.
She had brought in his coffee on request and as she was about to make her way out, one of his colleagues stopped her to exchange pleasantries. He told her what a fitting replacement she was for good old Mei Mei Chung and she blushed, smiling bigly at the compliment.
Edward felt his stomach roil. He could not help but think the man was flirting with her and not only was she enjoying it, but she was also flirting right back! It took nearly all his willpower not to tackle the man to the ground.
Everyone chuckled, and as Amy hurried away, she turned back to glance at him for a spilt second. Her cheeks were a rosy red. He felt bad that he might have embarrassed her slightly, but the others had already returned enthusiastically to arguing and countering each on the best policy, so he forced the incident to the back of his mind and thrust in his own contributions.
Looking at her now, he felt bad all over again. He did not have any real need for the magazine he was making her look for, so why was he punishing her that way, he wondered.
He decided he would have to redeem himself somehow, so reached into his desk drawer and retrieved two small cards which he slipped into the b.r.e.a.s.t pocket of his suit. Then he punched into his phone for a few seconds before standing up and moving towards her.
She felt motion beside her and looked up to see that Edward had moved closer and was staring at her. In a confused panic, she got up and made towards the door.
His hand shot out and held her back. Her throat felt too dry for words, so she swallowed painfully, staring up at him with pleading eyes.
She was confused about her own reaction. 'What are you afraid of, girl? Haven't you dreamt of this for weeks on end?' she scolded herself, willing her body to quit its panicking.