Part 2 (2/2)
Phil looked awkward. His eyes looked at the table while he rubbed his chin. As he looked up, he scratched his nose.
”What am I looking for?” he asked.
”Nothing in particular. Just see if you can find out about him. Im trying to build a picture, not find out dark secrets.”
He rubbed his hands together, and his brow still showed a frown. I remembered the first time that my manager asked me to keep my ears and eyes open. I too felt awkward because I had initially imagined that work was conducted in the way described in study texts. When you experience the real world, of course, you find there is this whole other world that no-one talks about. Much as I wanted to focus on recruiting the best people and developing them to their full potential, we have to work within management objectives and commercial constraints. Whether I like it or not, we are part of the management team and that means we bend to their wishes.
”Phil, I understand how you must feel. Sometimes we have to do things that are not pleasant. The worst thing you might have to do one day is make people decent people redundant. If you stay in this profession, youll learn how awful that can be. At other times, you may suspect that someone is acting more in their own interests than those of the business. When that happens, we sometimes need to be circ.u.mspect in finding out what we can. It is a very difficult job and we can only find out so much by asking people directly. Im not asking you to spy, just keep your ear to the ground and mix in certain circles when the opportunities arise.”
He looked at me briefly and smiled, but the lines on his forehead never totally disappeared.
”Okay. Ill see what I can find out.”
”Good man,” I said and I felt my body relax. I smiled strongly at him, got up and walked towards the door. Phil got up slowly and made to leave. As he pa.s.sed me, I put my hand on his shoulder and rea.s.sured him. ”Youll be fine. If youre not, come and talk to me.”
With Phil gone, my mind turned back to the task Id been putting off. I knew that I must reply to John, but did not relish the task. Even though Id thought about it all the previous evening, I was still not sure what to say. One thing I am sure about - I want to keep in touch with him. The problem is how to do that without ending up in a ”situation” where I get hurt.
Words and phrases keep going around and around in my head but no concrete sentences form. It is just a drink, I keep telling myself, but I cannot forget that nearly every relations.h.i.+p Ive had with a man gets complicated. One that I lived with, despite having a lovely side to his character, ended up taking me for granted. I dont want to mother my partner; I want him to look after me. There have been others that I adored for a short while (and who adored me) but as soon as they started talking about their goals in life, I felt them threaten my own. One wanted me to move with him to London just after Id started this job. I wouldnt go and the relations.h.i.+p ended. Why am I thinking like this? It is just a drink, after all.
As much as I keep trying to convince myself that he only wants friends.h.i.+p, I cannot shake off the idea that going drinking with a married man will lead to problems. If I get close to him, will he make a pa.s.s at me? Why will this one be any different? And if he did, would I be able to resist him? Perhaps this is why I am so nervous. I dont want to be a mistress. I have to write something so I create an e-mail and stare at the screen. My fingers start to type: John, Tell me about your marriage. How strong is it?
Penny I hit the Send key before I realise that he might take this question the wrong way. While contemplating my gaff, a message appears in my inbox.
Penny, Strong enough for you not to worry about it.
John I had hoped for a fuller explanation than that. No kiss today, I notice. Perhaps my question irritated him. At times like this, I tell myself to follow my head. What does my head say today? I listen carefully to my thoughts; there is danger here, to myself, to his marriage and children. But there is potential too. What if he is how I hope he is? It will be a pleasure to know him. Could he become a friend I can trust and talk to like my father? But what if he turns out to be a creep? What will happen if I start to love him? I cant deny my desire to meet him or the thought that if I turn this opportunity down Ill always ask have the question ”what if..” I will never answer any of my questions if I dont get to know him. As one of my school friends used to say to me ”life is not a dress rehearsal”.
John, I accept. When would you like to meet?
Penny x In for a pound. Later that day, he e-mailed me back to ask if Id meet him in Leamington the following Wednesday. He could stop by as he was working in Birmingham then staying with friends in Warwick. With that out of the way, I relaxed and focussed better on my work.
Chapter 7.
With the week coming to an end, I finalise arrangements with interviewees and then decide to check on Elona. She is quite young, in her mid-twenties, and works within sales administration. Shes been with the company since leaving school and is well-known about the place. Ive only met her half a dozen times or so since joining, twice due to her recent complaint. I want to check that she is happy with the way we have dealt with it so I decide to read over her file and recent appraisals.
She is a single child, the daughter of local shopkeepers. When she was in her teens, she worked in the shop with her parents and saved enough money to go to college for two years. She lives in Kenilworth, a small town about 7 miles away. Nice place. In her interview notes it says that she led a relatively sheltered upbringing due to her parents ties to the shop. Holidays have been few but she does have good friends in the local community. She has a boyfriend her fiance - who she provided as a second emergency contact. They hope to buy a house together soon but each live with their parents at the moment.
Her career at IC has progressed fairly smoothly. She started in a typing pool seven years earlier. When it was disbanded she took on a series of clerical jobs, including a stint in customer services, but eventually felt her attention to paperwork and maintaining filing systems was being under utilised. In short, she wanted something more challenging than a continual stream of phone calls. The move to sales administration, therefore, was a good one for both her and the company. Her knowledge of order processing together with customer skills equipped her for a trouble-shooter role in which she dealt with customer complaints.
By all accounts, she appears to be a reliable hardworking employee. So I called her and asked her to drop by. Fifteen minutes later, we were sitting together in my office having a cup of tea.
”Hi. Glad you could come. Do you take sugar?” I asked.
”No. Thanks. Hmmmm. Thats very welcome,” she said taking her first sip.
”I wont take much of your time Im sure you want to get away like me. I want to check that you are happy with the way we have dealt with your complaint.”
Elona looked slightly puzzled, but smiled and settled back in her chair a bit.
”Yes. Very. Its the first time Ive seen anyone in this company take a complaint like this seriously,” she commented.
”Good. Im glad Im making a difference. The directors want this company to follow best practice and Im here to make sure that happens.”
Elonas comment made me feel good on the inside. I continued boldly and directly.
”Elona. One of the directors wants to be sure that Mikes behaviour is not part of a pattern. Had you ever been concerned about his behaviour before you made the complaint?”
”Me? Well...” she hesitated, ”...sometimes I felt uncomfortable around him. Hes very friendly too friendly if you ask me and he does seem to be very attentive to some of the women reps.”
Elona stopped for a moment to gather her thoughts. She rubbed the back of her neck and crossed her legs.
”They didnt seem pleased with me when they came in for a meeting yesterday. I heard later that they were leaving my section to stay with Mike. They always speak highly of him and hes always joking with them. I find it embarra.s.sing sometimes. He treats them almost like they are his daughters. They seem to like it, but I dont. I dont like it when men are too familiar with me, put their arm round me and things.”
”Things?” I asked.
”Well, you know...” she said.
”No, Elona, I dont know. Tell me?” I said firmly.
”Well sometimes, especially if were down the pub after work, they go too far.”
”How?” I asked.
”They put their arm round me like they would their girlfriend or something. I dont like it.”
”Does Mike do this?”
”Not often. Sometimes. The younger lads are worse.”
”How exactly?”
”Well sometimes their hands go down my back, and sort of rub it. Its too familiar, but I feel stupid if I say 'no because everybody seems to be okay with it. One of them sometimes puts his hand on my bottom and squeezes it. I dont know what to do, so I do nothing.”
This seemed like 'normal behaviour in most companies that Id worked in but that did not make it okay. Clearly Elona was more shy than most. Others would have to be sensitive. I decided to dig a little more deeply; I adopted a more woman-to-woman style.
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