Part 39 (1/2)

He moved away from her.

”Ewan, please speak to me. Don't push me away.”

Though it ruptured his heart, Ewan ignored her plea. He had to.

If he didn't...

He brushed past Ryan roughly, and went to tend private matters in the forest.

Nora watched Ewan leave and felt a profound urge to follow after him and beat him with a branch until he shaped up and talked to her.

”He loves you.”

She blinked at Ryan's voice. ”What did you say?”

”He loves you, doesn't he?”

”What makes you think that?”

Ryan sighed. ”The expression on his face when he looks at you and the hatred in his eyes when he walked past me just now. I half expected him to strike me.”

Nora gazed at the forest where Ewan had vanished. How she wished she could see inside his heart for a minute to find out how he felt about anything. ”I know not what he feels. I only know he is a stubborn, aggravating man.”

”A stubborn, aggravating man that you're in love with as well.”

She frowned at Ryan.

”Don't bother lying, Nora,” he said gently. ”I've known you every day of your life. There's something about you that brightens whenever he's near you.”

She scoffed at the very idea. ”There is not.”

”Aye, but there is. You fair glow with it.” A muscle worked in Ryan's jaw. ”You never glow around me unless it's your face turning red because you're angry at me.”

”Then will you forget our betrothal?”

Ryan's face hardened, and when he met her gaze, the steely, determined look made her heart ache.

”I can't, Nora. I'm in debt too deeply. Some of these men will kill me if I don't pay what I owe. I'm sorry.”

She looked away as her heart broke a little more. ”So am I, Ryan. So am I.”

It took them three days to make it to Lochlan's keep. Ewan didn't speak to her at all, even though Nora did everything she could to engage him in conversation.

He wouldn't even look at her.

He acted as if she didn't exist at all, and every time he refused to address her or even look at her, her heart ached more. What would it take to make the man be reasonable again?

”Nay,” Catarina had said when she had told the gypsy of her feelings. ”He acts as if the sight of you is more than he can bear. He knows Ryan has a claim on you, and it's tearing him apart.”

Nora prayed that wasn't true.

But in the event it was, she set about making Ryan's life miserable. She chattered endlessly every time he came near her. She played her lute until he begged and threatened her to stop. She did everything she could think of to unnerve him.

And more times than not, she would send Ryan off in a hurry within minutes of his drawing close to her.

”Release me from the betrothal,” Nora had asked him repeatedly.

His only answer was the ever steadfast ”I can't.”

And so it went until she was ready to scream.

Now as they neared the end of the journey, she watched Ewan atop the wagon while she rode on a horse beside him. He kept his eyes focused straight ahead, and yet she had a sneaking suspicion that he knew exactly where she was and what she was doing.

”I suppose you'll be glad to be rid of me,” she said to him as he tried to ignore her. ”You'll be able to go back to your cave now.”

He didn't respond.

”I'll be glad to have a bed again,” Ryan whined from where he rode behind her. ”I fear my stomach has been damaged eternally. This pace the last few days has nigh killed me.”

'Twas a pity Lochlan lived so close.

Nora! She chastised herself.

How uncharitable!

It was, but at the same time, she couldn't bring herself to feel more kindly toward the man who was about to ruin her only chance at happiness.

She'd lost one man to another woman.

Now she was going to lose Ewan because of his honor.

Och, men and their honor. They were quite beastly about it when they wanted to be. Oh for the day when they would let love rule them and not their stupid code of n.o.bility.

She sighed wistfully as she watched him.

Please, G.o.d, please help him to see that I need him as much as he needs me.

They rode silently through the gates of Lochlan's castle, only to be pulled into full-scale pandemonium.

Her parents, Lysander, Pagan, Bavel and Ewan's entire family were all gathered in the bailey, and not a one of them looked any too pleased.

Nora wanted to turn her horse about and ride straight to England alone.

Only the fact that they closed the gate behind her kept her from it.

She could tell by the tenseness of Ewan's body that he had much the same inclination, but true to his character, he headed straight for the maelstrom.

On the steps outside the castle's door was a short, dark-haired woman who looked so much like Ewan that Nora was certain it was his mother. Two black-haired men flanked her, and by their heights and proximity to the woman, she a.s.sumed them to be two of Ewan's brothers.