Vol 2 Chapter 5.1 (2/2)
”Yeah.”
”Wanna give it a try?” His fingers moved away from s.h.i.+on's throat. In their place, the blade of a knife was pushed under his chin. It was cold. s.h.i.+on felt a p.r.i.c.k of pain.
”I won't let you make a blood serum,” Nezumi whispered. ”I didn't save you so you could go around doing something like that. Keep your nose out of things you have no business in. Stay holed up here until the time comes.”
”'Til the time comes? When's that gonna be?”
”When I strike No. 6 with its fatal blow, that's when.”
”When you strike No. 6...”
”Yeah. I'm going to choke its last breath out of it.”
The weight lifted off s.h.i.+on's chest. Nezumi put away his knife, and wiped the cruel smile off his face. He pulled a glove off, and stroked s.h.i.+on under the chin with his bare finger. A small red smudge came off on his fingertip.
”This is your blood. Don't even think of doing something foolish like making a serum. Put it to better use.”
”Nezumi.” s.h.i.+on grabbed his wrist. ”Why do you loathe No. 6 so much?”
There was no answer.
”What happened between you and No. 6? Why do you have so much hatred for it?”
Nezumi exhaled shortly. The muscles of his wrist flexed.
”s.h.i.+on, do you still not understand what kind of place No. 6 is? It sucks the nutrients from the places around it, and while they grow lean, it only become more engorged. It's a hideous―”
”Parasite City.”
”Yeah. So you do know what I'm talking about. Humankind is becoming more and more intent on expelling parasitic organisms. What I'm doing is the same thing. I'm going to exterminate and wipe No. 6 off the face of the earth. Once that place is gone, the people here won't have to live in a garbage can anymore.”
”But what I want to hear is your personal reason,” s.h.i.+on persisted.
”I don't have one.”
”You're lying. You're the one who told me only to fight for myself.”
Nezumi fell silent, and shrugged his shoulders.
”Is it revenge?”
Silence. Nezumi didn't even bother to shake s.h.i.+on's wrist off, and gazed at him as they stood face-to-face.
”Do you want revenge on No. 6? If you do― then what happened?”
”I don't need to tell you.”
”I want to hear it.” s.h.i.+on clenched his fingers around Nezumi's wrist. ”I want to know, Nezumi.”
Suddenly, Nezumi started laughing. It sounded like a laugh that was genuinely full of mirth.
”Geez, you're like a brat throwing a tantrum. Alright, s.h.i.+on.”
”Mm-hmm?”
”If I tell you, would you co-operate with me?”
”Huh?”
”Would you aid me as I stab a knife into the heart of the city you were born and raised in? Would you help me bring destruction― not salvation― unto that city? I don't need any blood serum. If parasite wasps do exist, then I'll use them. I want to wreak havoc on No. 6 from the inside. I want to watch as the people that have always lived in safety fall into a panic, flee in confusion, and lead themselves to destruction. That's the kind of thing I have in mind. Will you aid me, s.h.i.+on?”
s.h.i.+on shook his head from side to side. He dropped his gaze from the pair of grey eyes.
”I can't do that.”
s.h.i.+on's fingers were shaken off.
”You're always like that,” Nezumi spat. ”You babble on about how you want to know, but you're never prepared to handle it. To know means to be prepared to know. Once you find out the truth, there's no going back. You can't ever go back to being the way you were, blissful and unconcerned. Why can't you understand that? ―s.h.i.+on, let me ask another question.”
Nezumi squatted, and hooked a finger under s.h.i.+on's chin.
”Me, or No.6 ― which one do you choose?”
s.h.i.+on's breath caught in his throat. He knew he would be faced with this decision one day. He had felt it coming.
Which would he choose? If he chose one, he would lose the other. He didn't want to go back to No. 6. In that sense, he had no attachments whatsoever left for that city. But with people, it was different. His mother, and Safu, who was off in another city now, and the residents of Lost Town were all within those walls. Within those walls were familiar scenery and fond memories.
If Nezumi harboured hatred toward the entirety of No. 6, its people, scenery, memories and all, then he couldn't sympathize with that hatred.
Nezumi's fingers withdrew from his chin.
”You love No. 6, and I hate it. That's why― one day, we're going to be enemies.”
It was a murmur. A murmur that stabbed at his heart.
”I have a feeling that we will,” Nezumi said quietly.
He had said something similar before. That time, too, s.h.i.+on had said that he wanted to know. He had wanted to know how Nezumi grew up. I want to know about you, he had said. And now he was receiving the same answer as he did that time. We're going to be enemies. But that time, there had still been laughter in Nezumi's eyes, and his voice had been light with jest. But now, it was heavy. A darkness hung over the statement, and its weighty reality sank deeper into s.h.i.+on. It was Nezumi's honest answer.
Some day, we'll be enemies.
Nezumi rose to his feet, and looked up at the clock on the wall.
”c.r.a.p, I'm late,” he said to himself. ”The manager's probably p.i.s.sed off.” He turned his back to s.h.i.+on. His voice and his eyes were wiped clean of any shadow of murderous intent. His grey eyes were bright, and his tone of voice was casual.
”Nezumi.”
”Yes, yes,” Nezumi said unconcernedly. ”Mama is going to work now. Little lamb, you are in charge of the house while I'm gone. A scary wolf is going to come by, but whatever you do, you aren't allowed to open the door. Okay?”
”Don't underestimate me,” s.h.i.+on said quietly.
Nezumi's expression hardened. He drew his chin back a little, and knitted his brow.
”What did you just say?”
”I said, don't underestimate me too much.”
”Are you offended because I called you a little lamb? Then why don't I give you the role of the Little Red Riding Hood? Cute and innocent Red Riding Hood. Oblivious to doubts and caution, she ends up being eaten by the wolf. A perfect role for you.”
I'm not going be provoked. You can condescend me all you like. But I have something I need to tell you.
”Sometimes there are things I can see that you can't.”
”I don't understand what you're saying,” Nezumi said bluntly. ”Oh wait, that's supposed to be your usual line, right?”
”You put everything into dichotomies,” s.h.i.+on continued, ignoring Nezumi's comment. ”You either love or you hate. You're either friends or enemies. Outside the wall, or inside the wall. And you always say you can only ever choose one of them.”
”Of course. If I stood there at the fork in the road wasting time trying to decide what to do, I'd wither away. That's what cowards and traitors do. You can't run away forever. Some day you'll have to choose one over the other.”
”Don't you think that there could be a third way?”
”Third way?”
”Yeah.”
”s.h.i.+on, what you're saying is incomprehensible,” Nezumi said irritably. ”What 'third way'?”
”Instead of destroying No. 6, what if you made it disappear? Don't you ever think about that?”
Nezumi put a hand to his cheek, and took a deep breath. He was restraining himself from letting it show on his face, but s.h.i.+on could tell he was agitated. s.h.i.+on took a step forward.
”Tear the walls down. Get rid of them.”
”You mean No. 6's barriers?”
”Yeah. Without its walls, No. 6 as a place will no longer exist. Everyone will be able to come and go freely. Take away the walls and gates. Then there will be nothing dividing No. 6 and the Blocks from each other, and―”
Nezumi burst out laughing. He bent over, holding his stomach. His hollow laughter echoed in the bas.e.m.e.nt room. The mice huddled together fearfully and curled up into b.a.l.l.s, making them smaller yet.
”Is it that funny to you?” s.h.i.+on said tensely.
”It's hilarious. It's so funny, it's bringing me to tears. You're not just a little airheaded, are you? Do you also have delusionary tendencies? What third way, huh? Those are just pretty words, an unrealistic fairy tale.”
”Nezumi, I was serious when I said―”
”I'll have none of it.” There was not a remnant of a smile left in his face as Nezumi said those words. ”We can't have that place disappear so easily just yet. We have to let it keep being the way it is, let it dress itself up and eat a bellyful of good food, let it grow fat. I can just imagine how great it must feel to slice that belly open with one blow. I'm going to pull out all of its gorged innards and expose it to the light. I can't wait. Yeah, spring is going to be great. I'm quite excited.”
s.h.i.+on lifted his chin, and clenched both hands into fists at his sides.
”I don't care if you laugh at me, I still think it can be done,” he said defiantly. ”I want to believe that it's possible.”
”You're just looking for an escape route,” Nezumi shot back. ”You're looking for a way to avoid getting hurt. Say if you do get rid of the walls: you won't get any kind of heaven. It'll be h.e.l.l. Tumult, disorder, fighting, looting― you don't know how much these people have been oppressed until now. You don't know how many people have been sacrificed so that city can be where it is. You don't know, and that's why you can spin fairy tales like that. s.h.i.+on, it can't be done. It's not like mixing paint, you can't mingle them together and make them one. Either one will have to destroy the other, that's the only solution. That's what fate has set out. Love and hatred, friends and enemies, those within and those outside the wall― and you and I. They can never be as one, and neither can we.”
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