9 Second Chance. (1/2)

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Caring for the Aloe Vera plant has become the part of my life that I can actually predict happening.

Every morning I wake up and water the Small plant. Making sure it is still the way I left it when I feel asleep sends a wave of relief over me before I go to work.

The daily ritual doesn't exactly have a calming effect. Nor does it insure that today will be a good day. Doing this does not insure that I don't breakdown in public, or get distracted when I'm working.

It is just something that holds me accountable. If I don't take care of it, it dies.

Simple as that.

It's a routine.

One I don't plan on changing anytime soon.

Friday, January 2, 2015

Lately, I find myself checking my phone more often. There is no denying that it has something to do with those messages.

With this person I never know what they are going to say. Their actions and existence is all too unpredictable for me. Something I'm starting to realize gives me anxiety.

But, I didn't expect them to say nothing at all.

So far, I checked the same message three times.

Speaking of unpredictable things, ate pancakes this morning.

Honestly, the recipe just popped up online. I don't know why I made them. There was nothing that made them look 'different' or 'better' than any other pancake. I tried just them.

They say the first always look strange. A little uneven, pale, ugly, clumsy ”different”. But after the first they'll get better.

Somehow, I was able to turn all of them into a 'first pancake'

Scrolling through the comments of the blog post, I realize that I wasn't the only 'culinary infant'.

”This recipe sucks!”

”The picture looks good, but my turned out too gross.”

”I rate this one out of five stars!”

Those and many others like it were peppered throughout the comment section. Though the good outweighed the bad.

I check my phone one more time before shutting off my phone clean the kitchen.

Monday, January 12, 2015

It's dying.