Chapter 37 (2/2)

What did he say? Share a bed with me?!

—

My b.u.t.t still hurt; it seemed like whoever kicked me went all out. I rubbed it a few times without betraying my feelings, and glanced sideways at the little Prince Mole. “It’s only the ninth month, so how could the nights be chilly? Fourth, this is where you’re wrong. I feed you and raised you and save your life…but you’re still fixated on getting closer in vain hopes of sullying your Master’s purity.”

He wore a shameless smile and stopped talking, though his eyes had the hidden bitterness of someone thwarted in love. Silently, he moved to sit on one side, though he couldn’t resist raising a leg to kick me. Looks like little Prince Mole felt extremely depressed and wronged…

I had the sudden insight that something wasn’t quite right, and uncertainly narrowed my eyes at the chess pieces. “You’re so familiar with those obscure arts of the Five Elements. Something as simple as a board game shouldn’t thwart you, and you even had me lose for you. Were you doing it on purpose…”

He was indignant. “Whatever, I don’t care. Either you come to my room, or I go to yours.” I was dumbfounded, but before I could reply, someone else retorted with a shout.

“Exactly how do you think you’re speaking to Master?”

Before the voice faded, its owner had raised his eyebrows at me. I hastily took the hint and lowered my head to reverently pour him a cup of tea. I then realized that wasn’t right either, but by the time I looked up, he was already lifting the cup to drink.

What was this called…?

Servility.

I was born to serve others no matter how grand I looked, or how impressive my reputation was, or how I ridiculed my seven talented, unrivaled young princes. Who didn’t know the suffering and distress behind my impressive image, oh my bitter life…ah, I didn’t even get to say it…as a carefree idler of the jianghu, I was just an idle person they could boss around.

Though I’d saved some of their lives and grew familiar with the rest, I only discovered after returning home that it was easy to invite guests, but hard to send them off…all of them started dawdling around. Especially this guy, the oldest. Though he wasn’t the earliest one to enter these doors, he insisted on being called First.

Originally, I thought he had some status in the martial arts circles, at least enough to become their leader. If I hadn’t cured his poison in the past, he might not have let me off so easily. I thought saving him was just as simple as that… As it turned out, he had a good heart, and followed me with his sword for a hundred and eight thousand li[2] to repay his debt of grat.i.tude.

But in order to conceal his ident.i.ty the past few years, his martial arts skills became less and less outstanding. Fortunately, the so-called Prince Mole, Little Fourth, did a divination and suggested he go into business. n.o.body foresaw that the silver would come pouring in afterwards. Nowadays, he paid off all expenses in the house. In short, he came to repay me but ended up getting paid instead.

Although we had lots of people in this house, our lives were pretty satisfactory. I didn’t speak of statutes so we lived rather casually. They all said I couldn’t tell good from bad…

What did they mean by ‘good and bad’?

I really had no idea.

“What are you thinking about?” a certain person behind me raised his foot again and gave me a ruthless kick, though it was lighter than before. “Everyone’s been waiting for you to wake up…it’s time to eat.”

I made a noise of agreement.

He brushed my shoulders as he walked past, the clothes swinging with a steady rhythm. This guy really was worthy of being called First with an imposing manner like that. I couldn’t imitate that air even if I cultivated for 800 years.

My mouth opened and closed as I scuttled after him.

—

There was a round table with seven seats. After everyone sat down, two were still empty, so I counted First, Second, Fourth, Fifth…yikes, Little Fifth’s complexion still looked terrible, he must have been heavily poisoned.

The dishes arrived, nine plates of delicate meats and vegetables all properly arranged, as well as a big bowl of soup with spots of oil floating on the surface[3]. I stretched my neck to look outside, feeling so hungry…

Were they going to eat or not?

“TIME TO EAT!” I raised my internal energy and roared.

The bamboo leaves shuddered in the absence of wind, revealing the pale pink silhouette intermittently weaving back and forth through the air. He was agile and quick, holding onto a bamboo branch as he looked at us from far away with a wretched expression.

“Come down, come down. Get down here if you have any guts,” a figure dressed in yellow robes stuck his hands on his waist, stomping his feet. He had a crafty gaze in his eyes as he looked up, poisonous powders in his hands.

Just like an affectionate lover.

I almost couldn’t bear disturbing their time together.

“Eat,” the oldest ordered angrily.

Maybe his voice hadn’t been loud enough, but he had always been a man of action. Slowly, he raised the chopsticks in his hands and snapped them without so much as a blink. Then he waved his sleeves in a whoosh of wind.

Those two broken chopstick halves were ruthlessly quick and accurate. They shot powerfully through the bamboo grove and into the wetlands beyond, missing the two people there by millimeters.

No wonder he was a martial arts expert…

There was nothing ambiguous about his actions at all.

In the twinkling of an eye, a wind surged in from outdoors and rattled the table. Very shortly, all seven chairs of the table were filled, and everyone started pouring wine and picking vegetables as if nothing had happened at all. No one minded while I held the heaving form of the pink-robed youth in my arms, his flushed face even brighter than the peach blossoms. Distressed, I fussily used my sleeve to wipe the sweat from his brow.

“Come, eat a piece of rabbit, it’ll strengthen your legs,” I encouraged him.

Without fail, he obediently picked up his chopsticks and gave a piece to the little Poison Prince.

All right…now the Poison Prince was angry enough to have fire flaming from his eyes.

I’ve got to say…if he can’t catch up to you, then that’s that. To actually use these chopsticks to mock him wasn’t just being heartless and unfair, it was dragging me into danger as well.

I lowered my head to blow on the soup, cooling it. Then I drank it with gusto, not daring to stray my vision a bit. Suddenly, little Fourth Prince Mole raised his head, as if listening in rapt attention. His words came out of the blue. “Master, someone’s come to visit.”

I spat out a mouthful of soup, hastily wiping my mouth with my sleeves.

Curses, who came to call during mealtimes? This was obviously someone who wanted a free meal. I quickly stood up to look, though I couldn’t see anything: only a small, thin sound reached my ears, like wind or something else altogether. Immediately, the sound grew louder, creating a noisy ruckus in the bamboo woods beyond. The green leaves rustled against each other, accompanied by the faint sound of bells and flutes.

I took the time to collect myself. Someone had broken through the spell formation Little Fourth set outside our borders and entered our territory.

-o- Orginal and most updated translations are from volaretranslations.

[1] chaos (鸡飞狗跳) －jifei goutiao, the Chinese idiom literally means “flying chickens and jumping dogs.”

[2] a hundred and eight thousand li (十万八千里) －s.h.i.+wanbaqian li, not necessarily a literal distance, more of an idiom meaning a really, really long way.

[3] oil floating on the surface (上面飘着油花儿) －shangmian piaozhe youhua er, oil is an important part of Chinese cooking that adds flavor and taste; having a soup with oil in it also indicated a certain level of household wealth.