Part 4 (2/2)

This is why I didn't date, and why I would never date anyone that attractive, even if they were interested. This is also why I needed to stop drinking so much coffee.

And start drinking a lot more booze.

6.

Andi

After I'd explained four or five times using simple, non-technical words, Hayden started recording memos on his smartphone and sending them directly to me to type up. Dictation was something I could do with my eyes closed-literally-but I stopped doing it for his stuff. Because every time I closed my eyes, I started paying attention to the smoothness of his voice, its depth, the way his tone changed when he was speaking directly to me and forgot to type. Not at all good. I was fantasizing about someone I'd never meet and had less than zero chance with. And even if I did ever meet him in person, my luck was so amazing, he had to be either married or gay. Possibly both.

A message popped up. 'What did you do today, Sira?'

'I spent all day working on something for a very impatient jerk.' And I enjoyed his constant interruptions. Despite the fact that it was totally inappropriate, he seemed so relaxed with me, I felt like it was okay to be relaxed back. All I had to do was make sure we never strayed to any risky topics, shared any personal information, or discussed politics, religion, or s.e.x. That last one being the biggest no-no, of course.

'And did you finish what the impatient jerk asked you to do?'

'I did. He should probably check his inbox.'

'He will, once he's done being a jerk.'

'I'm not sure that will ever happen.'

'You're probably right.'

I wondered if he was like this with everyone. I wasn't-only my closest friends saw my sarcastic side. Or any other side, actually. 'What did you do today?'

'Sat around trying to figure out how to be a better jerk. But I got too impatient and moved on to other things.'

I laughed as I typed. 'I have bills to pay, so send me something else to do.'

'You're very demanding.'

'And impatient.' I should be working, not chatting.

'How long have you been doing this?'

Um... 'I've been impatient all my life. I've been doing the virtual thing for about a year.'

'Do you plan on continuing for long?' Simple question, really. But for some reason, it bothered me, made me wonder if our chats might be headed toward more dangerous territory.

I typed, 'You're full of personal questions today, aren't you?'

'I needed a break. And what better way to amuse myself than to bother you? If it's working too well, feel free to tell me to go away. Anytime.'

'It doesn't bother me.' In fact, I'd probably call it whatever the polar opposite of 'bother' was. Is it 'like?' Yeah, I think it's 'like.' d.a.m.n it. 'I plan on doing it as long as I can. Jobs are scarce.'

'But there's not much room for advancement in this realm, is there?'

'I don't need advancement, just a paycheck.'

'I've been told there's more to life than just that.'

'Not MY life.' Work, rinse, repeat. With the occasional meal thrown in or meet-up with a friend I couldn't get out of. 'Yours?'

There was a pause before he answered. 'It's just something I've been told.' That's when it occurred to me-what had been missing from all the images of his face I couldn't seem to get out of my mind and, in the interest of full-disclosure, had been scouring the net for. There wasn't a single bad one of him-no eyes closed, no mid-word convoluted expression, no crotch-shots. Unfortunately.

He also wasn't smiling in any of them, and there were no laugh lines near his eyes, not even a hint of them. Hayden Bennett didn't smile, not even with a gorgeous blonde on his arm. But I knew he smiled when he messaged me. I knew it. You couldn't joke and tease like that-even innocently-without smiling.

'What do you do for fun?' Holy h.e.l.l was that inappropriate, but I had to know.

'Tough question. I'm pretty boring.'

'No way. You're a s.h.i.+pping magnate. I bet you go yachting and drink champagne with your family every weekend.'

'Never use the word 'magnate' around me again, please. Also, fun is actually discouraged in my family. We usually stay on dry land and argue. Occasionally, we argue over wine though. Does that count?'

I would bet my paycheck he was smiling as he wrote that. 'Depends on the wine, I guess.'

'Ha.' And there was proof.

Proof that made me feel special, proud, like I'd done something miraculous by making him momentarily happy.

I guess that's what made me type what I did next: 'Do you ever wish you could start over? Go back to some point in your life and make a different choice?' As soon as I'd pressed send, I wanted to take it back. He was my client, not my confidante. I had no right to ask him that.

Then his reply popped up.

'Every single day. You?'

I chewed on my nail for a second, then answered honestly. Because he had. 'Every single day.' After a deep breath, I added, 'But if I did, I might have missed out on an opportunity to work for a boring, impatient jerk. So things could be a lot worse.'

'A jerk who wouldn't be able to get anything done without you. Maybe we should both consider ourselves lucky.'

I did. But right now what I couldn't consider myself was professional or sane. As much as I liked him, it wasn't worth s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g up the job. I needed his money, not him. I should be thinking about all the people I'd hurt, not myself.

I typed, 'Speaking of getting things done... Remember when you mentioned I could tell you to go away anytime I wanted? Well, now is anytime.'

'What? I couldn't hear you.'

'You mean, you chose not to listen,' I wrote.

'Still can't hear you. It's very loud in here.'

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