Part 22 (1/2)
Chapter 14.
Feeling vulnerable, I crossed my arms as I walked into Janet's office the following Wednesday morning. Somehow, needing to see my therapist again felt like a personal failure. But it was all so confusing now. I didn't know whom to trust, what to believe, where to turn.
Janet stood in the corner of the room, closing a file drawer. She looked up at me and smiled. ”Hi, Gwyn. Cold out there, isn't it?”
”Yes,” I said, unfolding my arms. ”And it's snowing pretty hard.”
”Supposed to get five inches.”
”Yes, I heard that too.” I settled into my favorite chair facing the window and watched as snowflakes fell softly out in her courtyard.
She walked over and took a seat across from me.
”How are things with you, Gwyn?”
”Well, you know, just once I'd like to come in here and say, wonderful, never better. But, of course, I'd be lying.”
Janet laughed softly. ”Well, maybe that day isn't too far off. You do appear troubled, tense. Am I right?”
”If I were a coiled spring I'd be bouncing around the room.”
”That bad.”
”I suppose I should have made an appointment sooner than this. I haven't been following your advice. I've been keeping things, a lot of things from you. But I really hoped to handle this on my own. Unfortunately, I can't.”
”Oh.”
”I found a letter that my sister Kelly wrote. She must have written it shortly before she died. I'm certain she didn't want me or Linda to find it, because it was taped to the inside of her dresser. The only reason I did find it was because it came loose and got caught as I was trying to open the drawer. She wrote that she'd been s.c.r.e.w.i.n.g her *sister's boyfriend' and was scared for her life. She also implied that this man may have killed a woman, a girlfriend possibly. That part wasn't clear. She also said there was a box, that he may have found *the box.' I have the letter in my purse if you'd like to see it.”
”Yes, I would.”
I handed it to her.
Janet read it, then looked up at me. ”How long have you had this?”
”Since around Halloween. And there's something else I'm very worried about, though I don't know if one has anything to do with the other. I think Trevor may be having an affair, possibly with a woman I met this past weekend. I'm not certain about the woman. It could be someone else. And I could be wrong altogether. I hope I am. But I came home after a weekend away and smelled another woman's perfume on my pillow. It definitely wasn't mine.”
”This letter does seem authentic. If it is, then I definitely would be worried too. Who else have you told about this?”
”Linda, she's the only one.”
”And what did she say?”
”Actually, she refused to believe it. She thought that Kelly made it up, that she wanted us to find it, in order to drive us crazy. Of course, Kelly did write a lot of fiction, short stories, poems, but nothing like this. And if she was making it up, why would she hide it?”
”Linda didn't suggest that you notify the police?”
”No, not at first. But I didn't want that either. Not until we could find out more. We've since hired a private investigator to do a background check on Trevor and Wolfgang.”
”And?”
”And ... nothing. Nothing at all,” I said, choosing to leave out the information about Trevor's father. It didn't seem sufficiently relevant at this point.
”Nothing on either man?”
”Well, I didn't see Linda's report. She wouldn't let me. But she swore there was nothing bad about Wolfgang. Unfortunately, I have a difficult time believing that.” I s.h.i.+fted in my chair. ”And there's a third person that Kelly could have been talking about, Josh, the guy I dated just before Trevor. I can't see how he could possibly be involved in any of this, but he was my boyfriend, and he did know Kelly very well.”
”Gwyn, I think you should give this letter to the police and let them handle it.”
”And not tell Trevor? But maybe I should tell him first?”
”No. I don't think so. I mean-”
The look on her face scared me. ”G.o.d, Janet, it's not Trevor. It's not. Trevor couldn't hurt a fly. And what if Linda is right? What if Kelly made it up? I love my husband. We're not on solid ground as it is. If he finds out I've kept all this from him, spied on him, and then the police pick him up....”
Janet stood. ”That shouldn't be your main concern. And I don't think you should let anyone know you've confided in me either.”
”Not even Linda?”
”No. I hesitate to say this, because it could be nothing, but you've told me that Linda and Kelly didn't get along. Did it ever occur to you that Linda found out about the affair?”
”Well, actually, it did, but I didn't.... She would have said something.”
”She would have? You're certain of that?”
”You're not saying that Linda could in any way be responsible, are you?”
”I don't know. My only concern is you.”
I turned and faced the window.
”I'm sorry if I've scared you, Gwyn. I can't be sure if your sister is hiding anything. But not showing you the report on Wolfgang, suggesting Kelly's letter has no significance, not insisting you both contact the police-”
”Linda did ask if we should go to the police. At the library, after she gave me the background check. I was the one who thought we should wait. I hadn't read Trevor's report yet.”
”Well, then certainly that could change things, but the police still need to know what's going on.”
I turned again to face her. ”Everything I say in here is confidential, isn't it? It doesn't leave this office?”
”Of course.”
”I'll think about what you've said, Janet. I'll give it some serious thought. Then I'll make my decision.”