Seven Unfortunate Lifetimes Chapter 12 (2/2)

I gritted my teeth. I really want to rush to the ginseng and eat him.

“But…but out there, there are people who want to kill me. They want to make soup of me…”

Ginseng demon sat on the ground. While wiping his tears, he said: “I escaped for so many days, I’m really exhausted.”

“Someone dares to dig at my Shengling sect’s mountain?”

s.h.i.+fu’s voice raised a decibel. I looked up and saw s.h.i.+fu thought for a moment.

“Alright, this young master (he’s referring to himself) just has a too good heart. Nanpei, I allow you to hide in this manor for three days.”

I kept staring at the ginseng demon. s.h.i.+fu covered my eyes and dragged me to his room.

“I said not allowed to eat is not allowed to eat. I’m tired today. Come, ma.s.sage my shoulder.”

I was accustomed to receive orders from s.h.i.+fu, but today I was unhappy.

“s.h.i.+fu, ginseng soup with chicken is really nouris.h.i.+ng.”

“En, I’ll let the cook give you a basket of ginseng another day. Love how to nourish and you can nourish”

“But that’s a ginseng of a thousand years…”

“Eating it will harm the yin in us.”

Anyway, he didn’t allow me to eat. I was very unhappy and didn’t ma.s.sage s.h.i.+fu’s shoulder. I just went back to my room.

The moonlight shone into my room. I toss and turn in my bed, yet I couldn’t sleep. My mind is full of images about the ginseng demon and the mother hen together. Suddenly, a light flashed in my mind and I remembered something else. The people of the sect down the mountain said that harmonious cultivation is a quick method to improve one’s energy. s.h.i.+fu said that the method is not suited for us. The ginseng demon became such a fine ginseng essence, he must’ve some cultivation. Should I just go cultivate harmoniously with him? Every day, every night, without pause and without rest, for about ten days. Then my progress will be quickly and s.h.i.+fu won’t say that I’m stupid anymore!

As I was thinking, I felt that I’m not as stupid as s.h.i.+fu usually says. I’m actually pretty smart.

The next day, I don’t know why but s.h.i.+fu went down the mountain again. I searched for a really long time before I found the ginseng demon in the firewood place. The moment he saw me, his face turned pale.

“Don’t! Don’t eat me! I can do anything! I can do anything!”

After what he said, I immediately laughed.

“Good, good. Let’s go cultivate harmoniously!”

The ginseng demon’s face froze or a moment. His pale face turned red.

“I I I I I have always been doing clear cultivation (meaning he’s a virgin)…I I I I don’t know how…”

I frowned. I felt that besides cooking this ginseng, he really isn’t useful. He looked up and glanced at me, seeming to know where my thoughts are going. There were cold sweats on his red face.

“How…however, I generally know how it’s done, if if ….”

The ginseng began to cry, looking really miserable.

“If you really…need, I’m willing to try with you.”

“En, then let’s try here first.”

Ginseng demon’s face turned white: “Here?”

“Should we do it in the hall?”

“The hall?”

He was stunned again.

I angrily asked: “Why don’t you say where?”

“This, this is more suitable doing it in a room.”

My room is too small. There isn’t any place to practice. I thought for a moment. s.h.i.+fu’s room is the best place. It’s broad and large and the air is good there. If something went wrong while we practice there, s.h.i.+fu will know when he comes back. So I took him to s.h.i.+fu’s room.

I and the ginseng demon sat on s.h.i.+fu’s table for a very long time. I don’t know how to cultivate so I just glared at ginseng demon. I don’t know what he’s thinking, but he looks like a madman. He was trembling and his face is red.

He… he must be getting into the right state, right?”

I copied him and began trembling and trying to get my face flushed. Ginseng demon asked: “You…what are you doing?”

“Copying you, ah”

I blinked and asked: “How do we start?”

He pinted his trembling finger at s.h.i.+fu’s big and soft bed.

“From… from there.”

I walked there and sat on the bed.

“And then?”

Ginseng demon also walked to the bed and sat beside me. He lowered his head.

“Then, then, probably, probably undress.”

I remembered s.h.i.+fu once told me that I’m not allowed to casually undress in front of others. But then I also remembered that s.h.i.+fu said that I shouldn’t treat learning martial arts as a casual thing. I was conflicted, so I obediently took off the coat.

“And then?”

Ginseng demon also took his clothes off, piece by piece. He lowered his head even lower. His voice was barely audible: “Continue…continue to take off.”

I obediently took my clothes off. I waited for the ginseng demon to take all his clothes off. Suddenly I saw a stream of blood streaming down ginseng demon’s face.

I was shocked and grabbed ginseng demon’s face. I saw that he’s having a nosebleed.

“Ah! 你走火入魔了3!”

Suddenly, I heard the door made a “zhiya”sound. Someone opened the door. s.h.i.+fu stood in the doorway looking at me. His brows rose.

“s.h.i.+fu,”I yelled. “Something went wrong.”

s.h.i.+fu walked at a very slow pace into the room and stood by the bedside. He squinted his eyes and looked back and forth at me and the ginseng demon. With a very soft but really scary voice he asked: “Xiao Xiang Zi, what do you want to do on s.h.i.+fu’s bed?”

I stared at s.h.i.+fu and seriously answered: “I was going to cultivate harmoniuosly with ginseng demon.”

s.h.i.+fu took a slight step back. His expression was really strange. It gave me an unfamiliar feeling.

I wanted to say more, but s.h.i.+fu suddenly grabbed ginseng demon’s collar and dragged him to the window. s.h.i.+fu didn’t even bother to open the window. He broke the window and threw the ginseng demon out, like throwing trash.

Very, very far, did the ginseng demon landed on the mountain. I don’t know where. Only the trace of ginseng demon’s nosebleed on the ground, is proof that he really has been here.

My mouth fell open in surprise and I looked blankly at s.h.i.+fu.

He turned. The cold wind entered the room through the broken window, making his hair messy. He looked at me and said in a tone that he usually used when he jokes with me: “Xiao Xiang Zi, your gut turned fatter. Say carefully again, what were you doing?”

I vaguely saw that something in s.h.i.+fu’s eyes isn’t the same as usual.

I didn’t care about the storm in s.h.i.+fu’s heart. I felt that no one in the whole world can understand the pain in my heart. I shook my head, stared at s.h.i.+fu and said tearfully: “You don’t let me make chicken soup, you don’t let me cultivate harmoniously, you even threw him away! Do you really not want to see me well?!”

I hugged my head and said hoa.r.s.ely: “You do not hate Xiao Xiang Zi, you’re just in love with Nanpei ginseng demon!”

I heard s.h.i.+fu taking deep breaths. The thought that master no longer likes me, felt like the sky was falling on me. It’s so heavy that I can’t face the reality.

I picked up my clothes and began dressing myself, while walking out.

“s.h.i.+fu doesn’t want me! I also don’t want s.h.i.+fu anymore! No ginseng to make soup with chicken, but there still mushroom to make soup with chicken!

Thirteen years old me, did the greatest thing I’ve done in my life. I, Xiao Xiang Zi, without dressing properly, ran out of s.h.i.+fu’s room, while crying, ran down the mountain, then….ran away from s.h.i.+fu (home).

Comments:

Poor ginseng demon, victim of all of this. Now I really want to eat ginseng soup with chicken.

和合双修 (hé hé shuāng xiū): I couldn’t translate it literally, so I decided on harmonious cultivation, but the meaning in that sentence is s.e.xually. I think the people of the sect mean that Chu Kong and Xiao Xiang Zi are having s.e.x day and night without resting. Even if it is the great celestial Chu Kong can’t have so much energy (blus.h.i.+ng). What are the sect people thinking?

男配 (Nán pèi): his name means male mate. Poor him, why did it have to be that name.

你走火入魔了 (Nǐ zǒuhuǒ rùmóle): the literal meaning is fire entered your demons. It’s a saying used when someone is obsessed with practicing martial arts that they get side- effects. Most of the time they turn mad. Xiao Xiang Zi thought the ginseng practiced too much and got a nosebleed.