Part 51 (2/2)

”No, no; it is necessary to her,” said the girl mechanically.

”But,” her father pursued, with still lower voice, ”there is always the danger lest she should over-exert herself. Last night I--I thought I noticed--but it was scarcely worth speaking of; I am so easily alarmed, you know.”

Maud tried to say something, but in vain.

”You--you won't desert her--quite--Maud?” said her father in a tone of pleading. ”I am obliged to be so muck away--G.o.d knows I can't help it.

And then I--I wonder whether you have noticed? I seem to have little influence with her.”

He stopped, but the next moment forced himself to utter what was in his mind.

”Can't you help me a little more, Maud? Couldn't you induce her to live a little more--more restfully at times?”

She rose, pus.h.i.+ng the chair back behind her.

”Father, I can't!” she cried; then burst into a pa.s.sion of tears.

”G.o.d help us!” her father breathed, rising and looking at her in blank misery. But in a moment she had recovered herself. They faced each other for an instant, but neither ventured to speak again, and Maud turned and left him.

Waymark came as usual, but now he seldom saw Mrs. Enderby. Maud received him alone. There was little that was lover-like in these hours spent together. They kissed each other at meeting and parting, but, with this exception, the manner of both was very slightly different from what it had been before their engagement. They sat apart, and talked of art, literature, religion, seldom of each other. It had come to this by degrees; at first there had been more warmth, but pa.s.sion never. Waymark's self-consciousness often weighed upon his tongue, and made his conversation but a string of commonplaces; Maud was often silent for long intervals. Their eyes never met in a steady gaze.

Waymark often asked himself whether Maud's was a pa.s.sionless nature, or whether it was possible that her reserve had the same origin as his own. The latter he felt to be unlikely; sometimes there was a pressure of her hands as their lips just touched, the indication, he believed, of feeling held in restraint for uncertain reasons. She welcomed him, too, with a look which he in vain endeavoured to respond to--a look of sudden relief from weariness, of gentle illumination; it smote him like a reproach. When the summer had set in, he was glad to change the still room for the open air; they walked frequently about Regent's Park, and lingered till after sunset.

One evening, when it was dull and threatened rain, they returned to the house sooner than usual. Waymark would have taken his leave at the door, as he ordinarily did, but Maud begged him to enter, if only for a few minutes. It was not quite nine o'clock, and Mrs. Enderby was from home.

He seated himself, but Maud remained standing irresolutely. Waymark glanced at her from under his eyebrows. He did not find it easy to speak; they had both been silent since they left the park, with the exception of the few words exchanged at the door.

”Will you let me sit here?” Maud asked suddenly, pus.h.i.+ng a footstool near to his chair, and kneeling upon it.

He smiled and nodded.

”When will they begin the printing?” she asked, referring to his book, which was now in the hands of the publisher who had undertaken it.

”Not for some months. It can't come out till the winter season.”

”If it should succeed, it will make a great difference in your position, won't it?”

”It might,” he replied, looking away.

She sat with her eyes fixed on the ground. She wished to continue, but something stayed her.

”I don't much count upon it,” Waymark said, when he could no longer endure the silence. ”We mustn't base any hopes on that.”

He rose; the need of changing his att.i.tude seemed imperative.

”Must you go?” Maud asked, looking up at him with eyes which spoke all that her voice failed to utter.

He moved his head affirmatively, and held out his hand to raise her.

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