Part 16 (1/2)
”Thank goodness forthat !”sighed the amba.s.sador, and began the walk back to his offices.
It had taken Terry some time to catch up with the others. She made several false turns, and though she had barely avoided some terrifying creatures, the place had been pretty deserted. She'd finally found them just as they were being led away by a pink dragon.
Hearing nothing of the briefing and knowing nothing of where they were, she made the instant a.s.sumption that her companions had been captured by the creature. She fol-lowed at a distance, hoping at least to see where they would be taken. Maybe, just maybe, she could get them out.
They went through a winding maze of corridors with so many twists and turns that she was not sure if she could find her way back.One problem at a time, she told herself.
She found that the last corridor ended in another of those black hexes. It figured, somehow. They were being sent someplace else. There was nothing to do but follow, she thought, but at least she had not been captured, and that might still come in handy.
From the corridor's far corner she watched them disappear into the hex, too far away to distinguish what they were saying. She suppressed a giggle when she saw Cam-pos being knocked in, though.
When Campos, too, had gone, she backed off, found an empty room, and hid there until the pink dragon returned back up another corridor.
She wasn't sure what was going on, where she was, or what lay on the other side of that black hex, but if Gus and Lori and Alama were there, then she had to follow before she got caught as well. It was sure better than staying here with those creepy monsters.
Allowing a good fifteen or twenty minutes to pa.s.s, hop-ing that whoever or whatever waiting on the other side of the black hex would be gone, she got up and made her way down the dead-end corridor where her companions had dis-appeared.
She was tempted to sleep first-she felt unimaginably tired as well as hungry and thirsty-but she knew she couldn't let the trail grow too cold, and while sleep might be possible, she couldn't chance discovery by any of the weird creatures she had glimpsed earlier.
Summoning up her last bit of willpower, she stepped into the blackness.
Ambreza
SHE SENSED THE WRONGNESS LONG BEFORE SHE CAME TO FULLconsciousness, a sense that something was missing or had been taken away. And yet she knew who she was. All the ”pictures”
were there in her mind: her mother, her father, friends and acquaintances, going to school, working, all that.
But she couldn'tarticulate those mental snapshots or put labels on them. It was as if she had words, even in her mind, only for the things that could be expressed in the lan-guage of the People. No, not even that. It was even more primitive, more basic.
Even that thought had no words to it but was rather an a.s.semblage of mental pictures and feelings. She was aware that her thought process was far different from what it had been before, as if all the rules for gathering, organizing, and interpreting information had been suddenly and radically changed. It was as bizarre and alien a way to think as any-thing she might have imagined, and it seemed slower and harder to a.s.semble thoughts or ideas and, once a.s.sembled, impossible to express them. All of her old languages had gone from her mind; they just weren't there anymore. Not even the People's. She could call up a memory or scene in her mind and remember the gist of what was said, but could not recall saying it.
Therewas a language there, but it was a strange one, composed of a series of images and concepts that seemed to form as if by magic in her mind, conveying real mes-sages, real thoughts and decisions, but with no words.
To even be able to think such complex concepts using such a method was amazing to her, but to be unable to express even the slightest sense of them was frustrating and likely to become more frustrating as time went on. And it washard to think; she had to concentrate.
What was happening to her?
She sat up, opened her eyes, and looked down at herself and was shocked at what she saw-or, more accurately, what shedidn't see.
Her body, in fact, looked perfectly normal, but the ce-mented bones in both her nose and her ears were gone. It felt odd not to have them there after so long, but also it was something of a relief. The tattoos, too, were gone, and her body didn't look all that different to her than it had before the People had done their stuff. Well, that wasn'texactly true. Her skin seemed, well, smoother and younger, and the scars were gone-even the appendix scar-and she seemed, well, maybe a little chubby, like she'd been when she was in her early teens. And she had long hair again, the same stringy jet black hair she'd always had, but it was down well below her shoulders, almost to her a.s.s, and it seemed to have a slick, slightly wet feel to it although no residue came off on her hands. She knew that hair didn't growthat fast; either she'd been unconscious a long time or some-thing beyond her understanding had happened to her.
In fact, in spite of those differences, she feltgreat. She couldn't remember when she'd felt this good, in top condi-tion, no aches or pains oranything. She felt like a kid again, although her fair-sized but firm b.r.e.a.s.t.s and the rest of her body a.s.sured her that she wasn't. If her mind were just working right, if she just had her language skills back, if it just weren't so hard to think complicated thoughts, she would have felt vast relief.
She sprang to her feet and looked warily around. The weight and swing of the hair felt very odd; she'd never had it this long before. Still, it was the least of her problems, and for some reason it feltright for the hair to be there.
She was in a stand of trees, but it was no jungle or rain forest; rather, it was almost parklike. The trees were notquite familiar but were far less strange than the ones of the Amazon. She felt thirsty and a little hungry, which was nat-ural, but she also suddenly felt a sense of danger and tension, of being too exposed. All her brooding, her attempts to think complex thoughts and sort things out, suddenly vanished, replaced by something else, something that re-quired no thought, no deliberation, but seemed in retrospect almost instinctual.
Almost before she knew it, she was climbing up a very tall tree that rationality would have said could not have been climbed. It was tall and had a long regular trunk with few opportunities for handholds or footholds, yet she went up it as if it were a stairway. Before she knew it, she was perched on a heavy limb seven or more meters above the ground below. The uncertain perch, the sheer drop, the smoothness of the trunk going back down did not bother her at all. Her sense of balance was absolutely perfect, and she didn't think the situation odd at all.
The upper parts of the tree bore a bana.n.a.like fruit; she walked over to a nearby bunch, picked one of them off, and began eating it, skin, stem, and all, all without conscious thought. The fruit had a banana's consistency but was green and brown on the outside and a bright orange color inside. It was moist and sweet and went down so well, she picked another. Somehow she justknew which ones were ripe and which ones to leave alone.
She did, however, shrug off the immediate feeling of contentment a full belly gave her, because the sense of ten-sion and danger still remained. Before she could relax, something impelled her to a.s.sess her location and the lay of the land. She climbed farther up, to where she could see out in all directions with little effort.
The immediate area was a sort of park with well-manicured trees and gra.s.sy areas filled with both sun and shade. The land beyond seemed to be gently rolling, with a number of rivers or streams and a road that came from off the horizon, made its way lazily around various stands of tilled and grooved farmland and across small bridges of stone or wood, and continued off to her right through more of the same sort of country. There was something odd about where the road vanished from sight; just before the horizon there was a sort of s.h.i.+mmering, like heat distortion but ex-tending along the horizon as far as she could see. But the s.h.i.+mmering wastoo steady and regular for it to be caused by rising heat-it seemed substantial, almost solid, and an image of a giant window came into her mind.
To her left a side road seemed to wander up to a huge, elaborate building with many more outbuildings beyond. The mind-picture that most matched was of a farm, but that was mostly because of the surrounding fields and the layout of the buildings; neither the house nor the outbuildings looked like anything she'd seen before. It was a pictur-esque, almost idyllic scene nonetheless, and she knew it; why, then, did she have such a strong emotional reaction to it, bordering not on fear but on repulsion? Had she been in the jungle so long that what once would have seemed a pleasant, peaceful, even charming scene now looked and felt so wrong? By contrast, that s.h.i.+mmering skyline in the opposite direction felt equally right; it had an emotional at-traction she could feel, as if it were a magnet softly pulling at her.
Recent events had been so strange and had moved so fast of late that she felt frightened and confused by almost ev-erything. She tried to put her thoughts in order and found that she couldn't. Putting the memory pictures together in some sort of context was hard. Worse, her experiences with the People felt more real, more understandable to her than anything she had experienced before. When she tried to re-call her past life, all she got was confusion and conflicting feelings. It was all there, but it just wasn't much use.
And if she couldn't think clearly and figure out what was hap-pening to her, what was she going to do?
She went back down the tree partway until she found a thick branch that forked into two only slightly thinner ones. With a little s.h.i.+fting, she discovered it made a pretty solid and secure seat, s.h.i.+elded from the ground by branches. She was sotired; perhaps sleep would help. It never even occurred to her that even her second incarna-tion among the People would never have considered this sort of perch either safe or secure. She was too tired to mentally fight herself right now. It was best to clear the mind, relax, and sleep it off. Perhaps it would let her think more clearly.
Settling back, eyes closed, as relaxed as she could be, she felt a concept come to her by a process that was com-pletely unfamiliar. It was hard not to have the words to use. It went against her entire cultural upbringing. Even the Peo-ple were as linguistically sophisticated as they needed to be. This was completely different.
Words can obscure as well as clarify. With this way, there was never an error in understanding, if what she was trying to comprehend was understandable at all.
Was that it? Was there something she was missing here?
Was it better not to think, too?She was here, hunger quelled and safe, because of unthinking action.
No. That would make me nothing more than an animal.
Then what?
Just as you speak when you need to speak, think when you need to think. Know when to speak and when not to. Know when to think and when not to.
But didn't she always need to think?
Learn to let go. Do not fight impulses, let it go. It is when nothing comes that thinking is required. Learn to trust yourself.
Her impulse just then was to go to sleep. She did not fight it.
It was almost dark when she awoke, but rather than feeling nervous about the setting sun, she felt less afraid, more con-fident. It was already becoming easier for her to not impose her own old mind-set on this weird situation and to em-brace this new and different inner way of thought. It was as if thoughts and decisions were debated and a.s.sembled far away in her mind, out of consciousness, then the entire set of possibilities was almost magically laid before her as a series of picture-objects.
This place was not where she was supposed to be or she wouldn't feel its wrongness. The direction toward the odd farm buildings felt even more wrong; so it was toward that s.h.i.+mmering wall that she must go, for only that way felt right. There was also a feeling of undefined danger in this area, so the quicker she got out of it, the better.
First she surveyed the area once again. There was an odd noise from the direction of the farm, and what she saw in the rapidly waning light made her gasp and brought on an intense feeling of danger and irrational distaste that was like nothing she had ever experienced.
Two creatures were in some sort of vehicle that was making a whining noise. It seemed to sway from side to side as it turned into the small road up to the farm. The ve-hicle was basically an open cabin mounted to a thick oval slab, but while it bounced along, it seemed to be hovering an elbow's length above the road, with nothing touching the road itself. It was the sight of the two creatures that caused her overpowering sense of dislike.
They looked like two giant beavers, each the size of a man; one was dressed in some sort of waistcoat, and the other wore a flowered bib and a silly-looking hat with a big flower sticking out of it.
The hovercar pulled up finally in front of the house and settled to the ground, its whine now cut off. The driver with the waistcoat got out, stretched, and walked around to open the door for its companion with the hat.