Part 5 (1/2)
”'_Salvete Domini!_' said he, in good fresh Latin.
”'_Tu sis salvus, quoque!_' said I to him, for my comrade wasn't cute, an' I was always orathor.
”'_Unde veniti?_' said he, comin' over us wid another deep piece of larnin' the construction of which was, 'where do yez come from?'
”I replied, '_Per varios casus et tot discrimina rerum, venimus a Mayo._'
”'Good!' said he, 'you're bright; follow me.'
”So he brought us over to his own house, and ordered us bread and cheese and a posset; for it was Friday, an' we couldn't touch mate. He, in the mane time, sat an chatted along wid us. The thievin' cook, however, in makin' the posset, kept the curds to herself, except a slight taste here and there, that floated on the top; but she was liberal enough of the whey, any how.
”Now I had been well trained to fis.h.i.+ng in my more youthful days; and no gorsoon could grope a trout wid me. I accordingly sent the spoon through the pond before me wid the skill of a connoisseur; but to no purpose--it came up wid nothin' but the whey.
”So, said I off hand to the gintleman, houlding up the bowl, and looking at it with a disappointed face,
'Apparent _rari_ nantes in gurgite vasto.'
'This,' says I, 'plase your hospitality, may be Paotolus, but the divil a taste o' the proper sand is in the bottom of it.'
”The wit of this, you see, pleased him, and we got an excellent treat in his _studium_, or study: for he was determined to give myself another trial.
”'What's the wickedest line in Virgil?' said he.
”Now I had Virgil at my fingers' ends, so I answered him:
'Flectere si nequeo superos, Aeheronta movebo,'
”'Very good,' said he, 'you have the genius, and will come to somethin'
yet: now tell me the most moral line in Virgil.'
”I answered:
'Discere just.i.tiam moniti et non temnere divos.' *
* He is evidently drawing the long-bow here; this anecdote has been told before.
”'Depend upon it,' said he, 'you will be a luminary. The morning star will be but a farthing candle to you; and if you take in the learning as you do the cheese, in a short time there won't be a man in Munsther fit to teach you,' and he laughed, for you see he had a tendency to jocosity.
”He did not give me up here, however, being determined to go deeper wid me.
”'Can you translate a newspaper into Latin prose?' said he.
”Now the divil a one o' me was just then sure about the prose, so I was goin' to tell him; but before I had time to speak, he thrust the paper into my hand, and desired me to thranslate half-a-dozen barbarous advertis.e.m.e.nts.
”The first that met me was about a reward offered for a Newfoundland dog and a terrier, that had been stolen from a fis.h.i.+ng-tackle manufacturer, and then came a list of his shabby merchandise, ending with a long-winded encomium upon his gunpowder, shot, and double-barrelled guns. Now may I be shot with a blank cartridge, if I ever felt so much at an amplush in my life, and I said so.
”'Your honor has hooked me wid the fis.h.i.+ng hooks,' said I; 'but I grant the cheese was good bait, any how.'
”So he laughed heartily, and bid me go on.
”Well, I thought the first was difficult: but the second was Masoretic to it--something about drawbacks, excis.e.m.e.n, and a long custom-house list, that would puzzle Publius Virgilius Maro, if he was set to translate it. However, I went through wid it as well as I could; where I couldn't find Latin, I laid in the Greek, and where the Greek failed me, I gave the Irish, which, to tell the truth, in consequence of its vernacularity, I found to be the most convanient. Och, och many a larned scrimmage I have signalized myself in, during my time. Sure my name's as common as a mail-coach in Thrinity College; and 'tis well known there isn't a fellow in it but I could sack, except may be, the prowost.
That's their own opinion. 'Corcoran,' says the prowost, 'is the most larned man in Ireland; an' I'm not ashamed,' says he, 'to acknowledge that I'd rather decline meeting him upon deep points.' Ginteels, all your healths--hem! But among ourselves I could bog him in a very short time; though I'd scorn to deprive the gintleman of his reputaytion or his place, even if he sent me a challenge of larnin' to-morrow, although he's too cute to venture on doing that--hem, hem!”