Part 15 (1/2)

”Okay,” Elise said, not sounding convinced.

”And...and...well, I'm sorry I left in such a hurry,” I muttered. ”I was gonna text you last night but-”

”You didn't.”

”No.”

”Who was the girl?” Elise frowned. ”Ex?”

”Yup,” I said.

”You sure were keen to get her away from our table,” Elise said, watching me and chewing at the inside of her lip.

I thought for a moment, unsure how to answer. ”Mm.” It was the best I could come up with. Just then my mobile rang on the table next to me again, making my heart jump and beat wildly. I glanced down at it and saw the same number that had rung just before flas.h.i.+ng up at me-Grace's number. I stared down at it, willing it to stop ringing.

”You can get that,” Elise said breezily. ”Don't mind me.”

I s.n.a.t.c.hed up the phone and switched it off, flinging it into my bag angrily. ”It was nothing important,” I said, as Elise looked surprised.

”Her?” She asked.

I nodded.

Elise bent her head and looked up at me. ”Wanna talk about it?” she asked. ”You know, I don't think I've ever seen someone look as horrified as you did yesterday when she turned up,” she said slowly. Elise hesitated. ”We should talk about her,” she said. ”If you're stressed it'll affect your work. That, in turn, would affect my work, and so I think we probably really do need to talk.” She pulled herself away from the door and walked over to me, then leant over and took the arms of my chair, turning me around so that I was now facing her. ”Open up to me. Tell me about her and we can make it better together,” she said, crouching down in front of me, gazing up at me with concern.

”You don't have to make anything better,” I said meekly.

”Yes, I do.” All the while she spoke, her eyes never left mine. ”I want to help you, Hol.”

”Where do I start?” I said, breaking the gaze and staring down at my lap.

Her hands were still on the arms of the chair as she crouched by me. She was only a few feet away, our faces close. I could feel the tension rising between us and bit at my lip nervously, wanting to pull away but not being able to.

”Start with telling me about your ex,” Elise persisted, putting her hand on my leg, running her thumb over the material of my jeans. My skin p.r.i.c.kled under her touch. ”She really freaked you out when she turned up out of the blue like that, didn't she?”

I couldn't look at her. She never took her eyes off my face, but I knew that if I looked back into those beautiful, persuasive blue eyes, it would tear me apart.

”Seeing her again after so long was a total headf.u.c.k, yes,” I mumbled. ”And the stuff she's been saying to me lately, too.”

Elise watched my every move and expression. ”Such as?”

”Just...stupid stuff.” I ignored her question, desperate to change the subject so that Elise would stop looking at me like that. ”Do you fancy going back to King's sometime?” I suddenly asked. ”It was neat, last time we went.”

”You're changing the subject.” Elise gave a small laugh.

”I know,” I said. ”So? King's?”

”When?”

”Tonight?”

”I can't, I'm sorry.” Elise stood up.

”It's okay.” I shrugged shyly.

”Only because I'm going out with Stig tonight,” she said quietly. ”Any other time...”

I saw a hint of something flicker across her face. What was that?

”Oh.” I tried to hide the disappointment from my voice. ”No matter.”

”It's all arranged,” Elise continued. ”I can't really cancel, I'm sorry.” She hesitated. ”Although I'd much rather go out with you, to be honest.”

Our eyes met.

”Would you?” I asked, not taking my eyes from hers.

”I would, yes,” she said slowly, her face flus.h.i.+ng slightly.

My heartbeat quickened. ”Things not going so well?” I asked, as lightly as my thudding heart would let me.

”Things are fine.” Elise nodded, more to herself, I think, than me. ”I just, well...” She took a deep breath. ”Never mind.”

We looked at each other a moment longer before I broke eye contact first and turned in my seat to busy myself gathering my belongings together, just for something to do. ”No worries,” I said, trying to keep my voice sounding normal. ”There'll be other times.”

”I hope so,” Elise said, standing up and making for the door. ”So are we good?”

”We're good,” I said.

”And that really is everything?” She watched me over her shoulder, one hand on the door handle. ”There's nothing else bothering you?”

I looked at her, thinking about how she'd been crouching in front of me just before, and the achingly lovely, caring look on her face when her eyes had searched my face for an answer. I remembered the feel of her breath on my face, her immediacy, her closeness, the touch of her hand on my leg.

I thought about everything she'd said to me in the cafe the day before, about how she thought I was kind and nice, and then what she'd just said about Stig and how she'd rather be seeing me tonight rather than him. I remembered the look on her face when she'd said it; it had been a look of intensity, of longing. Did she want me like I wanted her? She wanted to see me tonight, not Stig. She did! She wanted me, not him.

Courage swept through me. She did. She definitely wanted me. I could see it in her eyes, the way she was standing, the way she was looking at me. She was pulling me towards her, urging me to come closer.

”No, it's not everything,” I said, quietly. ”I've something else that's been bugging me for ages.” Looking her right in the eye, I got up from my chair and walked towards her, my breath coming faster now, my heart beating madly in my neck, feeling giddy with confusion and longing. If she walked out that door now, I knew I'd never do what I'd wanted to do for weeks.

”As in?” Elise looked confused.

”As in this...” I reached over and, putting my hands on her shoulders, pushed her softly against the door and kissed her, slowly at first, but when she didn't pull away, harder and longer.

The feeling of her lips on mine was all I'd dreamt about over the last few weeks, and I totally lost myself in her, in the feel of her softness, in the taste of her. Just as she began to kiss me back, the hint of her tongue brus.h.i.+ng against mine, making the backs of my knees turn to jelly, she pushed me roughly away, looked at me strangely, then turned and left my dressing room without a word, slamming the door behind her and leaving me standing there, utterly stunned.

My lips tingled from the pressure of hers on mine, my tongue still tasted hers. I groaned and pinched my eyes tight shut, pressing my lips together slowly, tasting her, remembering.