Part 1 (1/2)
KISS THE WITCH.
Dana E. Donovan.
ONE.
I don't know what woke me. The shrill screams and subsequent crash I heard out in the living room didn't do it. That came later. The clock on the nightstand read 7:29. I sat up in bed and rallied my thoughts. Across the room, brittle shards of sunlight cut through the blinds in vertical strips, casting prison bar shadows upon the wall. I squinted and refocused until my eyes adjusted to my surroundings. My head hurt from the wine I drank the night before, but not too badly. I find my body tolerates liquor better since my return to prime. I have greater stamina, too. You can ask Lilith. Though I suspect she would debate you on that just for the sake of argument.
I threw the covers back and swung my feet out of bed. They hit the floor just as the clock alarm went off. I swatted it without looking, triggering the radio. The news anchor was reporting on a stalled vehicle backing up westbound traffic on the Jefferson Street Bridge.
”And in other news,” he continued, ”Lexington is open again to both lanes of traffic after a train vs. automobile accident last night at the crossing resulted in one fatality. Authorities said the driver”
That's when the shrill screams and loud crash shook me from the bed. I ran out into the living room wearing only my boxers. I don't know what I expected to find. I only know I should not have been surprised. I saw Ursula standing over the bookcase. It had fallen over, books and knick-knacks spewed everywhere. The television set and the stereo equipment lay shattered on the floor beneath it. She splayed her fingers over her mouth, her eyes like two spoons, looking like she just witnessed a natural disaster. In a way, I guess she had. If you consider witchcraft natural. I looked at Lilith. She appeared more perplexed than alarmed.
”What happened here?” I asked, gesturing a sweep of my hand to encompa.s.s the fallout. ”That's my stereo. My G.o.dd.a.m.n TV!”
Lilith tiptoed over the broken gla.s.s to pat Ursula on the shoulder. ”Don't worry, hon,” she said. ”It was all old stuff. No harm done.”
”No harm done? Lilith....” I stepped toward the Blue Ray that I purchased only the week before and caught a thin sliver of gla.s.s in my big toe. I let out a cry to wake the dead, volleyed a few cla.s.sic cuss words at no one in particular and then hopped to catch a seat on the ottoman.
”d.a.m.n it, Lilith.” I cradled my foot upon my knee and pulled the gla.s.s from my toe. ”I just bought that thing last week. And the TV isn't even a year old.”
”Pah-leeese,” she said, scowling as if I had just peed on her shoes. ”I know you've had your eyes on that 57 inch flat screen down at Big Bob's. Ursula did you a favor.”
”Ha. Some favor. Remind me not to let you catch me eyeing a new car anytime soon.”
”Right, like you can afford a new car on your salary.” She pointed at my crotch. ”And put your foot down. Your boys look like they're ready to roll right on out of there.”
I looked down at my shorts and then at Ursula in time to see her eyes snap to a spot in the room less interesting. ”Fine,” I said, ”then you can get me a towel.”
”Oh, think not of it, sister,” said Ursula, holding her finger to the air. ”Allow me, for 'tis my regrets I bear surely.” She hurried to the kitchen and returned with a dishtowel wrung of cold water. ”Thou hast naught but to forgive me and I shall ner again disappoint thee,” she said to me.
I took the towel. ”You don't disappoint me, Ursula. I know you mean well. It's just that....” I threw my glance toward Lilith. ”There has to be another place where you can practice witchcraft without tearing the house apart.”
”Yeah,” Lilith answered. ”Where? Chucky Cheese? You know we can't go back there again. Not after...you know.” She winced uneasily, as is recalling that unfortunate incident that barred us from that establishment forever and nearly got us arrested. I dismissed her comment with a headshake.
”Forget it,” I said. ”And I'll thank you never to bring that subject up again.”
My toe stopped bleeding. I wrapped the towel around my foot and hobbled to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. I came back into the living room a few minutes later, surprised to see that Lilith and Ursula had already picked up the bookcase and most of the spilled electronics. Curiosity now got the better of me.
”What were you two doing anyway?” I asked.
”Same thing you should be doing,” said Lilith, scolding me, I think. ”Practicing a spell.”
I let her snippety att.i.tude go unchallenged. ”Figured that much. What kind of spell?”
”'Twas a zip ball,” Ursula answered. ”I tell you on my word, I spun it left, but it zipped right.”
”A zip ball?”
”Aye, 'tis all.”
”What's that?”
Lilith came back, ”A zip ball is basic energy control, level-one witchcraft at best. You should know how to do it by now.”
I admit that intrigued me. ”Okay. How 'bout you show me?” Lilith gestured toward Ursula, offering her another try at it. I shut her down on the spot. ”Oh, no.” I wagged my finger at her. ”Lilith. You show me.”
She rolled her eyes and flipped her hair back over her shoulder. ”Fine,” she said, as if what I asked was a bother. I knew it was not. Truth is she loves showing off her stuff. Can't say I blame her. There is not another witch in the world that can do what she does. Probably never was. Of course, I would never tell her that. It would only swell her already inflated ego.
I put my coffee down and coaxed Ursula back a few steps with me. I wanted to give Lilith some room, which is always a good idea when she messes with energy spells. I will spare you the details of how she electrocuted all the fish in the fish tank last year. Suffice to say it was not pretty, though the neighborhood cats ate well that night.
Lilith hiked her sleeves up and adjusted her stance, spreading her legs and bending them slightly. I took that to mean she was getting ready to run if anything went wrong. Definitely not a big confidence booster. I pressed Ursula's arm and together we backed up a tad more. Lilith saw that and smiled. She wiped her hands on her pant legs. I a.s.sumed to a.s.sure they were free of perspiration. Moisture aids in electro conductivity, you know. Just ask the aforementioned fish. I found myself doing the same, wiping my hands on the back of my boxers. This, too, made her smile. I wondered then how much of her preparation was solely for theatrical purposes. She can be such a ham. Ursula likes it, though, and unusually claps upon the successful execution of Lilith's spells. That, too, only serves to encourage her more.
Lilith continued, presenting her right hand, holding it out steady as if balancing an egg in the center of her palm. She set her focus on it. ”This takes some concentration,” she said, her eyes keenly narrowed.
”Of course,” I answered.
I feathered back another measured step. Ursula did me one better. She retreated to the doorway between the kitchen and living room, perhaps sensing potential for another serious mishap. I thought of joining her, when Lilith turned to me and said, ”Too late. I got it now.”
I hate when she does that. Makes me think I do not have a private thought in my head.
With a gentle puff, as if blowing out a candle, Lilith produced a small blue sphere of energy right there in the palm of her hand. It hovered silently, this mysterious globe no larger than a baseball. I could see into it, but not through it, its milky white center seemingly absorbing light rather than emitting it.
Lilith leaned into the sphere and blew on it again. It began a slow rotation clockwise. She blew once more and the rotation quickened. After that, she was able to keep it moving by brus.h.i.+ng it the way Spinelli brushed a basketball to spin it on his fingertip. Before long, the little blue orb was spinning so quickly it needed no help from Lilith at all. She was able to walk about the room with the ball spinning freely in the palm of her hand.
”Impressive, Lilith,” I said. ”Now what?”
She shrugged. ”Now I can do whatever I want. I can throw it at someone.” She gestured as though she might pitch it at me. I flinched only slightly. ”I can toss it at any electronic device. Short it out completely. It doesn't matter. The point is that it's basic energy control, and as a witch you should know how to do it, too.”
I smiled with a silliness I had not felt since grade school. ”You think I can?”
”Sure. Want to try?”
”Yeah?”
She turned around and threw the zip ball across the room. It hit the wall, splattering upon impact like a water balloon, sending a frenzy of electric blue spider webs scattering outward and dissipating into the corners. Ursula clapped. I did not, though I wanted to.
Lilith came to me, offered her hand and led me to the center of the room. She had me stand on the exact spot where only moments earlier she stood. There, the residue energy still lingered. I could feel it tingling in my toes.
”Here.” Standing behind me, she placed her hands on my hips and guided me into position. ”The energy is still very strong here. You feel it?”
”I do,” I said. ”It tickles.”
”Yeah?” She laughed lightly. ”Well, screw this up and it will do more than tickle.”
”What does that mean?”