Chapter - 41 (41) (2/2)

Lowering his head, he kissed her face gently and said, ”When all is said and done, you still have conscience toward me; you must have been forced by them to deceive me.” Suddenly his heart jumped, ”Who are those three fake prostitutes? Is Miss Fang among them? That little wh0re is a specialist in harming me, if this time she is not here, I will be greatly surprised.” Thinking about Fang Yi, his heart was both sweet and bitter. He saw that the woman with swollen yellow face had a slim and graceful body, most likely she was Fang Yi. Thereupon he reached out to wipe the makeup from her face. The putty powder fell, exposing an attractive, beautiful and charming face; she was around five, six years older than Fang Yi, but her countenance was more beautiful than Fang Yi. Turned out she was Madame Hong Jiaozhu.

After she was drunk, her cheeks looked like peach blossom, her skin looked as if it exuded water. In the past, although Wei Xiaobao felt that Madame Hong was beautiful and alluring, he had never dared to look at her with the least bit of frivolous intention. This time she was as drunk as mud, the opportunity had presented itself. Extending his right hand, he pinched her cheek, and saw her eyes tightly closed; she did not feel the pinch at all. His heart was thumping wildly, he pinched her other cheek.

Turning around, he walked over to the other two women. These two women's bodies were obese, they did not look like Fang Yi at all. One of these women had fiercely pounced on him. Wei Xiaobao picked up the wine pot and drenched her face with the wine, and then pulling her lapel, he used it to wipe her face, exposing her real face; surprisingly she was the fake empress dowager. Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted; he thought, ”I am rendering a really great service. His Majesty and Empress Dowager wanted me to arrest this old wh0re for revenge. With thousand ways, a hundred plans I failed to arrest her, who would have thought she unexpectedly came to the Lovely Spring Courtyard on her own to be an old wh0re. It can clearly be seen that by calling her the old wh0re, all along it was a divine strategy, early on I have a foresight.”

Wiping the fourth fake prostitute's makeup, he found out that behind the makeup was Fang Yi's face. Wei Xiaobao was greatly shocked, ”How did her waist become so thick? Could it be that she had an illicit intercourse with a man and conceive a child? By the heaven and the earth, the old wh0re really became an old wh0re, could it be that Little Turtle Wei has indeed become a little turtle?” Reaching out, he ran his hand over her undergarment, his hand did not touch skin and flesh; when he pulled it, turned out it was a pillow. Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud; he said with a laugh, ”Your conscience is a lot worse than Xiao Junzhu's. For fear that I might fall into your evil scheme, she repeatedly signaled me with her eyes. But for fear that I might recognize you, you even dare to disguise yourself as a big-bellied woman. Ha ha … you, little wh0re, become a big-bellied woman in Lovely Spring Courtyard, I will have an abortion for you. Early morning abortion or late night abortion, I will have the pillow taken out of you.”

Walking out of the hall, he saw several personal guards lying dead on the ground. The courtyard was without lantern, without any flame; there was not even a whisper to be heard. He thought, ”Fat and Thin Toutuo have drunk the drugged wine, in the end they won't be able to defeat those two sworn brothers of mine, but if Hong Jiaozhu and the others waiting to rescue them on the outside, the outcome will be very difficult to say. Two Gege, if today you return to heaven, please forgive Xiaodi [little brother] for not accompanying you dying on the same year the same month and the same day!”

Returning to the hall, he saw Madame Hong, Fang Yi, Mu Jianping, Shuang'er, Zeng Rou, and Ah Qi, six beautiful women were either unconscious or unable to move. Each one had her own beauty, each one had her own charm; his heart was greatly moved, he mused, ”There is another good-looking young Miss inside on the bed, she is a lot more beautiful than these six persons, the one I already bowed to the Heaven and the Earth with, but have not consummate the marriage in bridal room with ornamented candles. Tonight you anxiously looked for me, if your husband did not pay you any attention, won't I be too cold and ruthless [orig. 'without any sense of justice']? Won't I wrong you too much?”

He was about to step inside when he noticed Zeng Rou's pair of pretty eyes was fixed on him, her cheeks were blushing, her expression was tender and bashful; he thought, ”From Wangwu Mountain to Yangzhou, along the way you, this little girl, were always avoiding me, I can't even talk to you one more sentence. Tonight I must not be too polite to you.” He carried her in his bosom into the room and put her by Ah Ke's side.

He saw Ah Ke was still fast asleep; her long eyelashes hung down, the corner of her lips slightly curled into a smiling expression. Most likely in her stupor she was having a very sweet dream, she was being intimate with Zheng Keshuang.

Wei Xiaobao thought, ”Either give up, or go through to the end. I might as well have this bunch of old wh0re, fake prostitutes, good Miss, bad women, everybody moved in. This is Lovely Spring Courtyard, women came to a brothel, what good could they possibly do? It was you who came here, when you are awake, you can't blame me.”

Since childhood, his lofty ambition was to open a big brothel in Yangzhou, to come to Lovely Spring Courtyard and have dinner party with singsong girls, to have the prostitutes of the entire courtyard to accompany him. This moment, although the situation was not the same as the plan he drew in the former days, actually it was quite a magnificent feat, not a small matter indeed.

Immediately he carried Shuang'er, Ah Qi, Madame Hong, Fang Yi and Mu Jianping, one by one into the room. Finally even the fake empress dowager was also brought in. Eight women lay side by side on the bed. Suddenly he recalled, ”Must not take unfair advantage of a friend's wife. Er Sao, you are my older brother's wife; we are heroes and warriors, must uphold yi qi.” Hence he carried Ah Qi back into the hall and sat her properly on the chair. He saw there was a considerable praise in her gaze. Seeing her lovely and pretty countenance, her labored breathing, her chest moved up and down endlessly, Wei Xiaobao suddenly felt regret, ”I become sworn brothers with Great Lama and Mongolian Prince, it was not because we have affinity with each other, but simply because of a scheme, so that they won't come to kill me; those Da Ge, Er Ge are nonsense. This Miss Ah Qi is so pretty, it's a pity to call her Er Sao, I might as well make her my wife. The storyteller has told the story of 'Three Laughing Marriage Affinities, Nine-Beauty Scheme', Tang Bohu

[81] had nine wives. If I include Ah Qi, I only have eight beauties, still short one beauty. Pei, pei, pei!” he spat, ”The old wh0re is old and vicious, how can I consider her as a beauty?”

Compared to Tang Bohu, he was short one beauty; it was still acceptable. But now he had to lose two beauties, he was actually quite disappointed. Thereupon he brought Ah Qi back into the room. But only a few steps later, he suddenly recalled, ”Guan Yunchang escorted Huang Sao [older brother the emperor's wife] for a thousand li; he did not turn Liu Da Sao into Guan Er Sao [referring to Liu Bei and Guan Yu, Romance of the Three Kingdoms]. Wei Xiaobao escorted Er Sao for seven steps, I can't ignore yi qi too much. If I have to have two less beauties, then let me short two beauties; why afraid that I can't get it back in the future?” Thereupon he immediately turned around and put Ah Qi back on the chair.

Ah Qi did not know the raging battle inside his mind; being brought back and forth like that, she wondered what kind of trick he was playing, and was a bit surprised.

Wei Xiaobao entered the room and said, ”Miss Fang, Xiao Junzhu, Madame Hong, the three of you entered the Lovely Spring Courtyard to be prostitutes on your own. Shuang'er, Miss Zeng, the two of you voluntarily came with me to Lovely Spring Courtyard. What kind of place this is, although when you came you did not know, but since little girls have come to this kind of place, it won't be right if you don't accompany me. Ah Ke, you are my wife, you came here to patronage my Mama, that is, you patronage your own mother-in-law. Your husband is going to patronage you.” Stretching out his hand he pushed the fake empress dowager far away to the corner of the bed. He shook and spread the quilt to cover the remaining six women. Kicking his shoes off, with a loud shout he crawled into the quilt.

Heaven and Earth in confusion. After an unknown period of time had passed, the candle on the table went out, the room became completely dark. Also a long time had passed, Wei Xiaobao hummed the 'eighteen touches' in a low voice: ”A hundred and seven touches, touching Jiejie Meimei's [older and younger sisters] seven hands … a hundred and eight touches, touching Jiejie Meimei's eight feet …”

During this 'seven-hand, eight-feet', suddenly he heard tender and gentle voice softly said, ”No … don't … Zheng … Zheng Gongzi … is that you?” It was precisely Ah Ke's voice. She drank the Mi Chun wine the earliest, after sleeping for a long time, the drug effect gradually diminished, and she slowly regained her consciousness.

Wei Xiaobao was furious; he thought, ”Even in your dream you are thinking of Zheng Gongzi, thinking that he is climbing onto your bed; is it good?” Lowering his voice he said, ”It's me.”

”No, no!” Ah Ke said, ”You must not …” She struggled a little bit.

Suddenly they heard Zheng Keshuang's voice calling out from the hall, ”Ah Ke, Ah Ke, where are you?” Crash! Bang! There was a lot of noise as the chair, as well as the cups and plates on the table fell down to the floor.

Since his voice was coming from the hall, naturally the one embracing her was not him; in her shock Ah Ke's mind sobered a little bit. With a trembling voice she said, ”You … who are you? Why … I … I …”

Wei Xiaobao said with a laugh, ”It's your own husband; don't you recognize me?”

To say that Ah Ke was mildly surprise was a gross understatement. She struggled desperately to break away from his embrace, but her body was limp and without any strength. ”Zheng Gongzi, Zheng Gongzi!” she cried out in fear.

Zheng Keshuang staggered into the room, but there was not the least bit of light inside, 'Bang!' his forehead bumped onto the doorframe. ”Ah Ke, where are you?” he called out.

”I am here!” Ah Ke replied, ”Let me go! Little demon, what did … what did you do?”

”What?” Zheng Keshuang was baffled; he did not know that the last two sentences were addressed to Wei Xiaobao.

Wei Xiaobao was very excited and in high spirit, how could he be willing to let her go? ”Good Shidi,” Ah Ke pleaded, ”Please, let me go.”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”I said I won't let go, then I won't let go! A real man gave his words, dead horses cannot pull it back.”

Zheng Keshuang was startled and angry at the same time, ”Wei Xiaobao,” he said, ”Where are you?”

With an air of complacency Wei Xiaobao replied, ”I am on the bed, embracing my wife. I am in the bridal room with ornamented candles; what are you doing here? You want to disturb the bridal chamber?”

Zheng Keshuang was furious. ”Disturb your Ma's bridal chamber!” he cursed.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”You want to disturb my Ma's bridal chamber? Not today, because today she does not accept any visitor, unless you yourself want to be the groom.”

”Rubbish!” Zheng Keshuang yelled angrily. Following the direction of the voices, he pounced toward the bed. He wanted to uncover Wei Xiaobao, but in the dark he grabbed an arm. ”Ah Ke,” he asked, ”Is this your arm?”

”It's not,” Ah Ke replied.

Since it was not Ah Ke's arm, Zheng Keshuang thought it must be Wei Xiaobao's. Thereupon he fiercely pulled with all his strength. Unexpectedly he pulled the fake empress dowager, Mao Dongzhu's arm.

After drinking the Mi Chun wine, her brain was murky, but feeling that someone was pulling her arm, instinctively her left hand went up and slapped backhandedly. It happened to strike the top of Zheng Keshuang's head. Her strength had gone about 80, 90%, this palm strike did not have any real power behind it. But Zheng Keshuang was greatly surprised; he quickly turned around to withdraw. His head happened to hit the pillar of the bed and he fainted right away.

”Zheng Gongzi, what happened to you?” Ah Ke cried out in alarm, but she heard no response.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”He went to disturb the bridal chamber; he has crawled under the bed.”

Crying, Ah Ke said, ”He did not. Quickly let me go!”

”Don't move, don't move!” Wei Xiaobao said.

Ah Ke struck with her elbow and happened to hit his throat. Feeling severe pain, Wei Xiaobao threw his head backward. Ah Ke struggled free and hastily wanted to get off the bed. As soon as she rolled around, her body pressed the pit of Mao Dongzhu's stomach. Mao Dongzhu screamed from the pain and reached out to wrap her arms tightly around Ah Ke's body. In the darkness, Ah Ke did not have any idea who was holding her; in her abject terror, she lost all the strength in her body. Suddenly she felt that someone got hold of her right foot. She was so scared that her body was drenched in cold sweats, ”There are so many men on the bed!” she thought.

Wei Xiaobao could not find Ah Ke in the darkness. ”Ah Ke,” he called, ”Quickly make some noise, where are you?”

Ah Ke said in her heart, ”Even if you chop my head, I won't make any noise.”

”Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”You won't make any noise, I will touch one, I will touch two, I will touch everywhere, in the end I will touch you.” He suddenly sang the folksong, ”One touch, two touches, touching the beautiful woman. The beauty's face is like melon seed, could it be that you are the old wh0re?” [The original rhymes: melon seed – guazi, wh0re – biaozi.] While his mouth was singing the folk song, his hands were busy groping.

Suddenly they heard the clamor of voices outside the courtyard, some people shouted orders, a large number of troops had several brothels surrounded; and then there were footsteps, some people were entering the Lovely Spring Courtyard. Wei Xiaobao knew that these people must be either his own troops or Yangzhou's local officials; he was very happy. He was about to crawl out from underneath the quilt, but unexpectedly the incoming people were very fast; he saw torches and very soon those people had already entered the Sweet Nectar Hall. He heard Priest Xuanzhen's voice calling out, ”Wei Daren, are you in here?” His voice was filled with anxiety.

Before he could even think, Wei Xiaobao blurted out, ”I am here!”

As soon as Tian Di Hui warriors found out that Wei Xiaobao had disappeared, for fear that he might be in danger, they came out to look for him. They knew that he took several personal guards toward the Ming Yu Lane area, hence they investigated that area and found out that there was a fight in the Lovely Spring Courtyard. Upon entering the courtyard, they saw several dead personal guards lying on the ground and were greatly shocked. It was not until they heard his voice replying that they felt relieved.

Wei Xiaobao heard people shouting and calling, and then everybody seemed to swarm this way. He hastily stood up to let the mosquito net down, in the process his feet were stepping on several bodies, but he could not care less on whose bodies.

The mosquito net had just come down, Priest Xuanzhen and the others already entered the room. Each person had a torch in his hand; in one glance they all saw Zheng Keshuang fainted in front of the bed, and were very surprised. Someone called out, ”Wei Daren, Wei Daren!”

Wei Xiaobao called back, ”I am in here. Don't open the mosquito net.”

Hearing his voice, they all cheered. Everybody 'you look at me, I look at you', with smiling expression on their faces; they all thought, ”Everybody was worried, you are actually here to have fun.”

Under the torch light Wei Xiaobao put on his clothes, found his hat and wore it, and then crawled out of the bed. While putting on his shoes he said, ”I used some trick to capture quite a few offenders, they are all on the bed. This time everybody's merit is not small.”

They all felt very strange, but they knew for some time that the way he worked was like 'gods appear and devils vanish'; for the time being it was inconvenient to ask too much.

Wei Xiaobao ordered the men to have Zheng Keshuang bound, and have Ah Qi carried to the field headquarters on a sedan chair. He also had the edges of the mosquito net squeezed firmly underneath the bedding, and then asked for ten personal guards and ordered them to take the big bed back to the Imperial Envoy Field Headquarters. The captain of the personal guards said, ”Reporting to Daren: the door is too small, we cannot lift the bed out.”

”Idiot,” Wei Xiaobao cursed, ”Can't you tear the wall open?”

The captain understood immediately, he repeatedly said 'yes', and shouted his order. The personal guards set to work immediately, tearing the three walls of Lovely Spring Courtyard open. About a dozen personal guards fetched six or seven sedan chair poles and set the poles at the bottom of the bed, and then they lifted up the big bed, level and steady, and brought it out of the room.

By this time it was already daylight, the big bed was paraded through the main streets and marketplace of Yangzhou. The personal guards carried the 'do not panic' and 'step back' signs, with a gong and herald to clear the way, while the rest of the party marched behind the bed. When the common people of Yangzhou saw it, none of them did not click their tongue in amazement.

The big bed arrived at the He Garden, the gate was still too small. Learning from experience, this time the captain of the personal guards did not wait of the Imperial Envoy Daren's instruction, he immediately ordered his men to tear the wall open and brought the big bed into the reception pavilion, and set it down in the middle of the hall. Wei Xiaobao passed on his order: the captured offenders on the bed were not a small matter, he ordered several dozen higher-rank military officers to lead the troops with bows strung, with sabers unsheathed, to form a tight perimeter around the garden. He also had Xu Tianchuan and the others guarding outside the room, to prevent Thin Toutuo and the others from coming in and seizing the prisoners by force.

Although there were multitude men guarding all around the reception pavilion, in the hall itself Wei Xiaobao was left alone with the big bed. He thought, ”In the Lovely Spring Courtyard a moment ago, it was such a good opportunity, but out of seven beauties, apparently I only embraced less than half. Besides, in the darkness I did not know which one I already embraced, and which one I have not embraced. I'd better start anew, from the first line of 'one touch'.” Thereupon he hummed softly, ”One touch, two touches, touching Meimei …” pulling the mosquito net open, he threw himself onto the bed.

Suddenly his braid tightened, followed by a sharp pain on his throat; someone pulled his braid and lifted it up, the person's left hand fingers were wrapped around his neck. It was none other than Madame Hong. After all these time, the effect of Mi Chun wine had disappeared. Madame Hong, Mao Dongzhu, Fang Yi, and Mu Jianping, four women, had already awakened; while the acupoints on Shuang'er and Zeng Rou's body had gradually unsealed. It's just that the bed was carried along Yangzhou's streets, the bed was surrounded by numerous officers and soldiers, so that the seven women on the bed did not dare to move, they did not dare to make noise. This moment Wei Xiaobao wanted to enjoy tender, amorous good fortune, as soon as he climbed onto the bed he was grabbed by Madame Hong.

Madame Hong had a 'smile, yet not a smile' look on her face; she sternly said in low voice, ”Little demon, you have the nerve to amuse yourself even with me!”

Wei Xiaobao was so scared that his soul flew to the outer space; with a forced laugh he said, ”Madame, I … I did not amuse myself; this … this …”

”What song did you sing?” Madame Hong asked.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”That was something that I heard randomly in the brothel, you must not take it seriously.”

Madame Hong said in a low voice, ”Do you want to live, or do you want to die?”

Wei Xiaobao said with a laugh, ”Subordinate White Dragon Envoy respectfully wishes Madame and Jiaozhu to enjoy immortal good fortune forever, your long life the same as the heaven's. Madame's order, subordinate will receive and obey without delay.”

Madame Hong noticed that he was speaking those words frivolously, without any respect or sincerity. She spat and said, ”You must remove the officers and soldiers around the hall first.”

”Very well,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Won't that be easy? Let me go, I will issue the order.”

Madame Hong said, ”Issue the order from here.”

Wei Xiaobao had no choice, he loudly called out, ”Everybody outside, Zongdu [governor general], Xunfu [inspector general], Ministry of War Shangshu [department head], Minister of Revenue Shangshu, listen up: all officers and soldiers must withdraw, no one is allowed to remain here.”

Madame Hong pulled his braid and shouted, ”What Ministry of War Shangshu, Minister of Revenue Shangshu? Rubbish!” While saying that, she pulled his braid again, hard.

”Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao screamed, ”I am dying!”

When the officers and soldiers outside heard him calling Zongdu, Shangshu, and so on, they were already suspicious, as soon as they heard him crying in pain, several dozen men with sabers and spears in their hands immediately rushed into the hall. ”Imperial Envoy Daren,” they asked, ”What is it?”

Wei Xiaobao called out, ”No … nothing! Aiyo, Mama!”

The officers looked at each other in dismay, they were at a loss of what to do.

Madame Hong was furious; she raised her hand, 'slap!' she heavily struck Wei Xiaobao's face. Wei Xiaobao cried out again, ”Mama! Don't hit your son!”

Although Madame Hong did not know that when Wei Xiaobao called someone his mother, he was actually cursing her as a prostitute, yet seeing his mischief, she raised her palm again to strike. Suddenly the 'tian zong' [heaven reservoir] and 'shen tang' [divine hall] two acupoints behind her shoulder went numb, her right arm went limp and dropped down. Madame Hong was startled; she quickly turned her head around to see who had sealed her acupoints. But the person closest to her back was Fang Yi.

”Miss Fang,” she said with a cold laugh, ”Your martial art skill is not bad at all!” Her left hand swiftly moved toward Fang Yi's eyes.

”It wasn't me!” Fang Yi cried out, while leaning her head sideways to evade.

Madame Hong was about to attack again, suddenly two hands behind her back reached out and grabbed her left arm; it was Mu Jianping. ”Madame,” she called out, ”It was not my Shijie who sealed your acupoints!” She saw that it was Shuang'er who sealed Madame Hong's acupoints.

Mao Dongzhu raised her hand to strike Mu Jianping, fortunately she lost her internal energy that Mu Jianping did not suffer any injury. Mao Dongzhu's second palm strike came, Fang Yi stretched out her hand to block.

Seeing the four women were fighting each other, Ah Ke turned around, she wanted to get down of the bed. Her right foot had just stepped out of the quilt, ”Ah!” she cried, and immediately pulled her foot back. Wei Xiaobao was pulling her left foot. ”Don't go!” he said.

Ah Ke struggled hard and cried out, ”Let me go!”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”You guess: will I or will I not let you go?”

Ah Ke panicked; she turned around and sent out a punch. Wei Xiaobao ducked, 'Bang!' her fist landed on Zeng Rou's left cheek. ”What did you hit me for?” Zeng Rou shouted.

”I … I'm sorry … Aiyo!” Ah Ke said, but she was hit by Fang Yi's palm.

In an instant the bed was in great confusion, seven women beating and twisting randomly. Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted; he mused, ”This is called 'the whole country in rebellion, the heroes …' no, 'the heroines

[82] fight each other in muddled battle!'”

While he was thinking to fish in troubled water, suddenly 'crack, crash!', the big bed collapsed. Eight people 'you press on my hand, I push down your leg'. Seven women screamed together. Witnessing this scene, the officers and soldiers were dumbstruck. Wei Xiaobao roared in laughter while crawling out from among the crowd. But someone grabbed his left leg and twisted it. ”Everybody, let go!” he shouted, ”Officers, arrest all my wives, young and old!”

The officers stood in circle, but nobody dared to make any move. Wei Xiaobao pointed to Mao Dongzhu and said, ”This old wh0re is a criminal, you must never let her escape.”

The officers felt strange, ”You said these women are all your wives, young and old, how come one of them is a criminal, and two of them dressed as personal guards?” Immediately some of them pointed their sabers and spears to Mao Dongzhu, while some others dragged her out. 'Click, click!' they put manacles on her hands.

Wei Xiaobao pointed to Madame Hong and said, ”This Madame is my superior, but we'd better put her in shackles as well.”

The officers were even more surprised, but they put manacles on Madame Hong's hands anyway. Madame Hong's martial art skill was high, but her acupoints were sealed by Shuang'er, half of her body was numb and aching, it would be difficult for her to resist.

By this time Shuang'er and Zeng Rou managed to extricate themselves from the crowd. Recalling last night's experience, they were blushing, but also found it very amusing.

Wei Xiaobao pointed to Fang Yi and said, ”She is my first concubine!” Pointing to Mu Jianping he said, ”And she is my second concubine. First concubine needs to be put in shackles, second concubine does not need.”

The officers put manacles on Fang Yi's hands. The Imperial Envoy Minister's strange words and weird speech came out one after another, but by this time the officers had heard a lot, hence nobody thought it strange.

By this time, only Ah Ke was left sitting on the floor. They saw her hair was in a mess, her clothes was in disorder, she was wearing men's clothes, nevertheless her countenance was bright and outstandingly beautiful; her hands were holding down the hem of her long gown tightly to cover her naked legs. Her head was hung low, her cheeks were blushing. The officers and soldiers all thought, ”Of all Imperial Envoy Daren's wives, young and old, this wife is the most beautiful.”

They heard Wei Xiaobao said, ”She is my officially wedded wife, let me help her up.” He took two steps forward and said, ”Niangzi [wife (formal)], please rise!” while extending his hand to help her up.

Suddenly there was a 'Slap!' sharp and clear, the Imperial Envoy Daren's face was heavily slapped. With head hung low, Ah Ke cried and said, ”All you can do is bully me. Just kill me. I … even if I die I don't want to marry you.”

The officers looked at each other in dismay; they were all shocked. The Imperial Envoy Minister was beaten in public. As the officers, it was their official duty to protect him with all their might. But the person beating and disgracing him was the Imperial Envoy Minister's own lawful wife; they could not step forward to stop her with force, but shouting to berate her also did not seem to be the proper thing to do. For a moment they were at a loss.

Caressing half of his face which was hit, Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”How can I be willing to part with you by killing you? Niangzi needs not be angry, otherwise I'll have my men kill Zheng Gongzi.” He raised his voice to ask, ”Where is the man arrested at the Lovely Spring Courtyard?”

A Zuoling [Company Commander] replied, ”Reporting to Dutong [Commander]: this fellow has his hands and feet shackled and is being guarded well.”

”Very good,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”If he wants to run away, chop his left leg first, and then cut his right leg …”

Ah Ke was scared. ”Don't … don't … cut his legs,” she called out anxiously, ”He … he won't run away.”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”If you want to run away, I will chop Zheng Gongzi's hands.” Sweeping his gaze on Fang Yi, Mu Jianping, and the others, he said, ”If these first concubine, second concubine of mine ran away, cut Zheng Gongzi's ears and nose.”

Ah Ke anxiously said, ”You … you … what do these women have to do with Zheng Gongzi? Why do you put the blame on him?”

”Naturally they have something to do with him,” Wei Xiaobao replied, ”My women all have countenance of a flower, face like the moon, while Zheng Gongzi is a sex maniac. If he saw them, he would definitely harbor evil designs.”

Ah Ke thought, ”It's still not his responsibility.” But she knew that this person spoke without reason; it was useless to argue with him. In her anxiety, she broke into crying again.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”The women with manacles, take them away and guard them well, put fetters on their legs. Tell the kitchen to set up a banquet, the good Miss without manacles are to accompany me drinking wine in here.” The personal guards complied with loud voice.

Still crying, Ah Ke said, ”I … I don't want to accompany you to drink. Just put shackles on my hands.”

Without saying anything Zeng Rou walked out with her head hung low. ”Hey,” Wei Xiaobao called, ”Where are you going?”

Zeng Rou turned her head around and said, ”You … you are really shameless! I don't want to see you again!”

Wei Xiaobao was startled. ”Why?” he asked.

”You … you still ask me why?” Zeng Rou said, ”Others are not willing to marry you, you compel them to. You are a high-ranking official, do you think you can bully common people like this? Previously I thought you were a … a hero, who would have thought …”

”Who would have thought what?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

Suddenly Zeng Rou broke into crying; covering her face, she said, ”I don't know! You … you are an evil man, not a good person.” While saying that she ran toward the door.

Two military officers raised their saber to block; they shouted, ”You insulted Imperial Envoy, you must not leave. Wait for Imperial Envoy Daren's decision on how to punish you.”

Reprimanded by Zeng Rou like that, the happiness in Wei Xiaobao's heart immediately vanished into the thin air; he thought that what she said actually made a lot of sense. Being a Tatar high-ranking officer, he was relying on force to bully others, thus he was no different from the treacherous court officials and evil tyrants that the storytellers were talking about. He thought, ”I can't be a hero; that's fine. But I must not be a treacherous court official.”

Heaving a deep sigh he said, ”Miss Zeng, please come back, I want to say something.”

Zeng Rou turned her head and boldly said, ”I offended you, you might as well chop my head.”

Shuang'er had a good relationship with her; she hastily urged, ”Zeng Jiejie, don't be angry, Xianggong can't possibly kill you.”

Wei Xiaobao low-spiritedly said, ”You are right, if I force them to marry me, I am like the painted face treacherous court official (in the opera) seizing common people's daughter, just like the Tiger Wang kidnapping the bride in the 'Three Laughing Marriage Affinities'.”

Pointing to Ah Ke, he said to the Zuoling, the captain of his personal guards, ”Take this Miss out, also release that man surnamed Zheng, let them go and be husband and wife.” When speaking those words, he was extremely grieving. He also pointed to Fang Yi and said, ”Take her manacles off, release her as well, let her go find her beloved Liu Shige. Ay, my lawful wife loves her lover, my first concubine also loves her lover. Damn it, what kind of Imperial Envoy Daren, Dutong Daren am I? I am a double cuckold Daren.”

Seeing Wei Xiaobao was throwing a fit, the Zuoling was so scared that he stood with head hung low; he did not dare to make any noise. Wei Xiaobao said, ”Quickly take these two women out.” The Zuoling complied, he escorted Ah Ke and Fang Yi out.

Wei Xiaobao looked at the two women's back; in his heart he was really reluctant to let them go. As they walked out, Fang Yi and Ah Ke did not even turn their heads; there was not a word of thanks, there was not a single grateful glance.

Zeng Rou took two steps forward and said in a low voice, ”You are a good person! You … please punish me.” There was a deep regret on her tender face.

Wei Xiaobao's spirit was immediately aroused; he was beaming with joy as he laughed and said, ”Right, right! I must punish you. Shuang'er, Xiao Junzhu, Miss Zeng, the three of you are good women. Come, let us go in and talk.”

He was about to take the three women into the inner hall and had some intimate time with them when a military officer walked in and said, ”Reporting to Dutong Daren: there is someone outside, saying that he was sent by Hong Jiaozhu, asking to have an audience with Daren.”

Wei Xiaobao was scared out of his wits; he hastily said, ”What Red Jiaozhu, Green Jiaozhu [the word 'Hong' sounds like 'Red', different characters]? I don't want to see, I don't want to see! Quickly kick him out.”

The officer bowed and said, ”Yes!” He took a step backward, and then said, ”That man also said that they have two men in their hands, they want to trade them with two women in Dutong Daren's hands.”

”Trade with two women?” Wei Xiaobao said. His gaze swept on Madame Hong and Mao Dongzhu's faces; he shook his head and said, ”He must be joking! Such good merchandise, why do I want to trade?”

”Yes,” the military officer said, ”Let lowly officer drive him away.”

Wei Xiaobao asked, ”What kind of men he wanted to trade with? Damn it, what's so good about men? Trading men for women, I will suffer too much loss.”

The officer said, ”That man is talking nonsense, he said one was a Lama, the other was a Prince; they both are Dutong Daren's sworn brothers.”

”Ah!” Wei Xiaobao exclaimed; he thought, ”Turns out Sangjie Lama and Prince Galdan are caught by Hong Jiaozhu.” He said, ”A Lama and a Prince, what am I supposed to do with them? Go tell that fellow, these two women, even if he offered two million men, I don't want to trade.” The officer repeatedly said yes, then he withdrew.

Wei Xiaobao cast a glance to Zeng Rou; he thought, ”Previously she said that I am an evil man, not a good person. I have to let my own wives go, to let them marry their lovers before she considered me a good person. Humph! To be a good man, the capital is indeed not small. Sangjie and Galdan, two men, have already sworn brotherhood with me, if I don't trade them back, Hong Jiaozhu will definitely have them killed. Even if I keep Madame Hong, what do I do with her? Although she is extremely beautiful, she won't agree to enjoy immortal good fortune together with me, to have live as long as the heaven's with me. Damn it, paying more attention to a lover than friends is not a hero!” ”Hold on!” he shouted.

”Yes!” the officer replied. He bowed to await the order.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”Go tell him: have Hong Jiaozhu release those two men, I will return Madame Hong to him. This Madame has countenance of a flower, face like the moon; she is better than Xi Shi and Yang Guifei

[83], she is the world's priceless treasure. Originally even if he killed me I would not want to release her; to have me trade his two men with her, actually it is greatly advantageous to him. As for the other woman, although she is disappointing, I can't let her go.” The officer complied and withdrew.

All along Madame Hong maintained a wooden expression; only this moment she showed a smiling expression as she said, ”Imperial Envoy Daren really knows how to compliment others.”

”Madame,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”You are seriously beautiful, why be modest? We must be good people to the end, if I have to eat into my capital, then so be it. Deliver the goods first, receive the payment later. Guards! Quickly open my boss' manacles.” Receiving the key, he personally unlocked Madame Hong's manacles and walked her out.

When they reached the main hall, they saw the officer was talking to Lu Gaoxuan. Wei Xiaobao said, ”Mr. Lu, you must serve Madame well on her way back. Madame, your subordinate respectfully sends you, Senior, off in a triumphal return, wishes you and Jiaozhu will enjoy immortal good fortune forever, your long lives will be the same as the Heaven's.”

Madame Hong giggled tenderly; she said, ”And I wish Imperial Envoy Daren promotion and wealth, a life as long as Mount Nan, lovely wife and beautiful concubines, and to be rewarded nobility titles as Duke and Marquis for ten thousand generations.”

Wei Xiaobao sighed; he shook his head and said, ”To be promoted and gain wealth is easy, to have lovely wife and beautiful concubines, that will be difficult.” Raising his voice he ordered, ”Play the music, send the guest off, prepare a sedan chair.”

Amidst the sound of music, he personally walked her off to the main gate, and watched as Madame Hong climbed onto the sedan chair.