Chapter - 13 (13) (2/2)

”If you have a sweetheart,” Wei Xiaobao explained, ”I will also rescue him and get him out, then won't you also be willing to be my wife?”

”Pei!” Mu Jianping spat, ”You already have one wife and it's not enough? What an endless greed[26]!”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”The toad wants to eat the swan's flesh! Hey, Good Meizi, other than your Liu Shige, there are two other men being captured, one with jaw full of whiskers …”

”That must be Wu Shishu [martial (younger) uncle],” Mu Jianping said.

”The other has tattoo all over his body,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”With a tiger head on his chest.”

”That must be Blue Haired Tiger Ao Biao,” Mu Jianping said, ”He is Wu Shishu's disciple.”

”What is that Wu Shishu's name?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

”Wu Shishu's name is Wu Lishen,” Mu Jianping replied, ”His nickname is Shaking-head Lion.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”That nickname is very appropriate, whatever other people say, he always shakes his head.”

”Gui Dage,” Mu Jianping said, ”Since you are going to rescue Liu Shige, you might as well try to rescue Wu Shishu and Ao Shige.”

”Do your Wu Shishu and Ao Biao also have 'bashful flower obstructing the moon' women?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

”I don't know,” Mu Jianping replied, ”Why do you ask?”

Wei Xiaobao replied, ”I am going to ask their good-looking women first, to see if they would be willing to let me take an advantage, otherwise, won't I be staking my life to save others in vain?” Suddenly a dark shadow flashed before his eyes, some kind of object flew toward his face. Wei Xiaobao hastily ducked, but he was too late. 'Crash!' that object smashed right in the middle of his forehead. It was a wine cup.

”Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao and Mu Jianping cried out together. Wei Xiaobao leaped three steps backward, and crashed into a chair. Blood streamed down from his forehead, wine blurred his vision that all he saw was a vast expanse of whiteness.

He heard Fang Yi shouted harshly, ”Go and kill Liu Yizhou immediately, your miss does not want to live anymore, so that I won't receive this kind of senseless humiliation from you all day!” Turned out the wine cup was thrown by Fang Yi. Luckily, due to her severe wound, she lost the strength of her hand. Wei Xiaobao's forehead was hit by the wine cup, but the scratch was only skin deep.

Mu Jianping said, ”Gui Dage, come here, let me look at your wound, don't let the broken porcelain pieces remain in your flesh.”

”I am not coming near you,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”My own wife wants to murder her husband.”

”Who told you to speak nonsense?” Mu Jianping said, ”You want to take advantage of other women. Even I was angry to hear it.”

Wei Xiaobao burst into loud laughter. ”Ah, I get it,” he said, ”Turns out the two of you are drinking vinegar. Hearing that I was going to take advantage of other women, my first wife, my second wife, are drinking vinegar in a big way.”

Mu Jianping picked up her wine cup and said, ”What did you call me? See if I don't throw this wine cup on you.”

Wei Xiaobao used his sleeve to wipe his eyes. Seeing Mu Jianping pretend to be angry, but with a slight smile at the tips on her brow and the corners of her eyes, also Fang Yi look apologetic, although his forehead was painful, Wei Xiaobao's heart was very happy. He said, ”My first wife threw a wine cup, if my second wife did not throw, it would be unfair.” He took a step forward and said, ”Second wife may throw the wine cup!”

”Alright!” Mu Jianping said. Raising her hand, she splashed the half-cup of wine onto his face.

Unexpectedly Wei Xiaobao did not evade; the half-cup of wine trickled down his face. He stuck his tongue out and licked the blood and wine on his face, saying, ”Delicious, delicious! The first wife cut the blood, plus the second wife splashed the wine. Aiyo! I die tasty, I die tasty!”

Mu Jianping was the first to laugh, followed by a 'pft!' from Fang Yi; she could not restrain her laughter. ”Rascal!” she cursed. From her bosom she produced a handkerchief and gave it to Mu Jianping, saying, ”Wipe his face.”

Mu Jianping laughed and said, ”You are the one who hurt others, why do I have to wipe it?”

Covering her mouth, Fang Yi said, ”Aren't you his second wife?”

”Pei!” Mu Jianping spat, ”You promised yourself to him just a moment ago, I did not promise him anything.”

Fang Yi laughed and said, ”Who said you haven't promise him anything? He said, 'Second wife may throw the wine cup', and you raised your wine cup and splashed him; isn't that the same as you agree to be his second wife?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed. ”That's right, that's right!” he said, ”My first wife is hurt, my second wife is also hurt. The two of you may set your hearts at ease; I am not going to fool around with other women.”

Fang Yi told Wei Xiaobao to come over; seeing there was no porcelain fragment in his forehead wound, she wiped the blood from his face.

The three of them could not drink wine anymore, their stomachs were hungry, so they ate quite a lot of food. Chatting and joking, gaiety filled the room.

Finished eating, Wei Xiaobao yawned and said, ”Shall I sleep with the first wife tonight, or the second wife?”

Fang Yi's countenance was grim, she sternly said, ”You should stop cracking jokes; if you ever get into the bed, I'll … I'll kill you with a sword.”

Wei Xiaobao stuck out his tongue and said, ”There will come a day when my old life will be delivered in your hands.” Moving the food to the outside hall, he fetched a woven mat and spread it on the floor, and slept fully clothed. At this time he was really weary, so in just a short moment he fell fast asleep.

The next morning when he woke up, he felt his body was nice and warm. When he opened his eyes, he saw that his body was covered with a quilt; he also felt a pillow under his head. He sat up and noticed the muslin curtain above the bed was hanging down. Through the mosquito net he could faintly see Fang Yi and Mu Jianping were sleeping side by side.

Quietly he stood up and opened the curtain. He saw Fang Yi was tender and beautiful, Mu Jianping was exquisite. The two beautiful women's smart faces were reflecting each other, they looked like bright pearl or beautiful jade; his heart was unspeakably moved by their beauty. Wei Xiaobao could not bear the desire to give each one a kiss on the mouth, but he was afraid he might awaken them. ”Damn it,” he cursed in his heart, ”If these two young ladies truly became my first wife and second wife, Laozi will be very happy. There is no young lady as charming as they in the Lovely Spring Courtyard.”

As quietly as possible he opened the door. The door hinge creaked, Fang Yi immediately opened her eyes; she smiled and said, ”Gui … Gui … Good morning.”

”Gui what?” Wei Xiaobao asked, ”You did not even call me Good Husband.”

”But you have not rescued him yet,” Fang Yi replied.

”Don't worry,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”I am going to rescue him.”

Mu Jianping also woke up, ”What are you talking about this early in the morning?” she asked.

”We did not sleep at all,” Wei Xiaobao replied, ”The two of us talked heart to heart the entire night.” He yawned, patted his mouth, and said, ”I am so sleepy, I am so sleepy! I want to sleep now.” And then he stretched.

Fang Yi blushed, she said, ”How can I talk anything good with you? How can it be considered the entire night?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed. ”Good wife,” he said, ”We were talking decently. Please write a letter, I am going to give it to your Liu Shige, so that he will believe me and follow me out of the Palace. Or else he would become Wu Sangui's son-in-law …”

”He pretends to be Wu Sangui's son-in-law's nephew,” Mu Jianping said.

”Since Miss Fang is going to be my wife, Liu Yizhou won't have any choice but to be Wu Sangui's son-in-law,” Wei Xiaobao said.

”Don't prattle!” Fang Yi said, ”Writing a letter is good. But … but what should I write?”

”Anything is alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Just write that I am your husband, the number one good person in the world, one with most yi qi, one who accepted your commission to come and rescue him. Genuine goods at fair prices, a hundred percent real gold.” He found Hai Dafu's writing brush and ink stone, and some paper. He rubbed the ink, placed a sheet of white paper on the small table, and pushed the table to the front of the bed.

Fang Yi sat up and received the writing brush. Suddenly tears gushing out of her eyes; sobbing, she said, ”What should I write?”

Seeing her cute but pitiful appearance, Wei Xiaobao's heart suddenly turned soft. ”You may write whatever you want to write,” he said, ”I am illiterate anyway. You don't need to write that you have become my wife, otherwise your Liu Shige will get angry and won't want me to save him.”

”You are illiterate?” Fang Yi asked, ”You are lying.”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”If I know how to read, I am a turtle bastard, and not your husband; I am your son, your distant descendant.”

Fang Yi took up the pen, she hesitated, feeling that it was hard to put the pen to the paper, she sobbed and sniffled, and finally broke into crying again. Wei Xiaobao's heart was filled with heroic spirit, which was hard to suppress; he said in a loud voice, ”Alright, alright! After I rescue Liu Yizhou and take him out, you can marry him, I don't want to fight with him over you. Besides, even if you followed me, you would still want to be together with him anyway. Rather than wearing a green cap[27] in the future, becoming a cuckold, I'll let you go free and happy, marry that damn Liu Yizhou. Just write whatever you love to write. Damn it, Laozi won't care.”

With a pair of big eyes still brimming with tears, Fang Yi looked at him, and then she lowered her head, her gaze revealed a happy expression mixed with gratitude. She wrote several lines of characters on the paper, and then folded the paper into a square. ”Please … please give it to him,” she said.

Wei Xiaobao cursed in his heart, ”Damn it, now you don't even call me Dage. Tear down the bridge after crossing the river, after setting off the flame, the monk is not needed anymore.” But since he had flaunted his heroic spirit, he had to put an air of hero, he could not force Fang Yi to be his wife anymore. He took the folded paper, put it into his pocket, and left without looking back. He mused, ”Want to be a hero, one must suffer losses. Such a nice wife, and I have to present it with both hands to another man.”

By this time, the leader on duty at the Imperial Bodyguards' compound by the Palace of Heavenly Purity was Zhang Kangnian. The previous night he had received the order from Dolong to give assistance to Gui Gong-gong who was on rescue mission to take the assassins out of the Palace, but he had to do it discreetly, without rousing the assassins' suspicion. Seeing the arrival of Wei Xiaobao, he busily stepped forward to greet him. He gave an eye signal to Wei Xiaobao as he took him to the rockery outside. ”Gui Gong-gong,” he said in low voice, ”How are you going to rescue them?'

Seeing his friendly attitude, Wei Xiaobao thought, ”His Majesty told me to kill one or two Imperial Bodyguards on this rescue mission, so that Liu Yizhou and the others won't be suspicious. But this Zhang Laoge ['Ol' older brother Zhang'] is very good to me, I can't bear to kill him. Luckily I have that stinky girl's letter, that 'deserved-to-die' surnamed Liu will believe me a thousand times, ten thousand times.” After slight hesitation he said, ”I'll go in and interrogate these three sons of a turtle again, and then I'll act accordingly.”

Zhang Kangnian laughed while cupping his fist and said, ”Thank you very much Gui Gong-gong.”

”Thank me for what?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

Zhang Kangnian replied, ”Xiaoren simply handling matters following Gui Gong-gong's suggestion. In the future I am sure Gong-gong will enjoy unceasing promotion. Xiaoren will get promoted and enjoy riches, I won't fail in everything I do.”

Wei Xiaobao smiled and said, ”You only need to serve His Majesty with utter devotion, and then in the future you will have only one thing to fear.”

Zhang Kangnian was stunned. ”What thing?” he asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”That the storage in your home is too small, you can't store more money.”

Zhang Kangnian laughed aloud. And then he lowered his voice and said, ”Gong-gong, about a dozen of us have made a secret agreement that all of us will do our best to help Gong-gong to accomplish your missions. Whatever happens we will support Gong-gong to achieve the Head Court Eunuch position in the Palace.”

Wei Xiaobao smiled, ”That would be wonderful!” he said, ”Let's wait until I am a few years older before we talk about it again.” Recalling how Qian Laoben delivered a live pig to patch a loophole, he asked, ”Where did Deputy Chief Rui Dong go? Dolong Zongguan and all of you are very busy, how come I do not see Deputy Chief Rui?”

”Most likely the Empress Dowager sends him on a mission outside the Palace,” Zhang Kangnian replied.

Wei Xiaobao nodded. ”When you see Deputy Chief Rui, tell him to come to my room,” he said, ”His Majesty wanted me to ask him some questions.” Zhang Kangnian promised to do that.

Wei Xiaobao entered the Imperial Bodyguard building and went straight to the room where Liu Yizhou and the others, three people, were bound. He did not see them for only one night, but their spirits seemed to be weakened a lot. Although they did not receive any more beating, but two days and two nights without any food and drink, even a man made of iron would not be able to withstand. The seven or eight Imperial Bodyguards keeping watch over them stood up and paid their respect to Wei Xiaobao; their manner was very respectful.

Wei Xiaobao loudly said, ”His Majesty has issued an imperial decree: these three rebellious thieves committed treason and heresy, they are to be immediately beheaded in public. Quickly get some wine, meat, rice and vegetables, let them eat until they are full, so that when they die, they won't be hungry ghosts.” The Imperial Bodyguards complied with one voice.

The dragon-bearded man Wu Lishen said in loud voice, ”We will be loyal to Ping Xi Wang to the death, we are leaving a good name for hundreds of generation, ten thousand times better than you, animals who become the lackeys of the Tatars.” One of the Imperial Bodyguards raised his whip and lashed it down, while cursing, ”That rebellious thief Wu Sangui will be executed soon, along with his entire family to the third generation.”

Liu Yizhou looked agitated, his eyes were staring at the ceiling, his lips were trembling slightly, but nobody knew what he was saying.

The guards brought in three large bowls of rice and three large bowl of wine. Wei Xiaobao said, ”When these three rebellious thieves heard they are going to be beheaded, they are shaking from fear all over. I am afraid that the wine, they won't be able to drink, the rice, they won't be able to swallow. I must bother three Xiongdi a little bit, please feed each of them two mouthful of wine, I don't want them to drink too much. About the rice, please feed them. If they are drunk, they won't feel the pain on their neck when their heads roll, it would be too easy for them. When they get to the underworld and Yanluo Wang sees three drunk ghosts, he will be very angry, and then each drunken ghost will get three hundred floggings with the stick. That means we are giving them too much of a bad time.” The Imperial Bodyguards laughed; then they fed the three prisoners the wine and the rice.

Wu Lishen gulping the wine and gobbling the rice, his expression was calm and composed. With each mouthful of rice he ate, Ao Biao uttered a curse, ”Dog servant!” Liu Yizhou looked deathly pale, he could not swallow his food, only less than half a bowl later he shook his head and did not want to eat.

”That's enough,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Everybody out. His Majesty ordered me to ask them some questions. After that, the beheading.”

Zhang Kangnian bowed and said, ”Yes!” He led the Imperial Bodyguards out of the room and closed the door behind him.

When Wei Xiaobao heard the sound of their footsteps were far enough, he coughed and then leaned his head toward Wu Lishen, three people, sizing them up; his face showed a furtive smile.

”Dog eunuch,” Wu Lishen cursed, ”What's so funny?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”I am laughing on my own, what does it have to do with you?”

”Gong-gong,” Liu Yizhou suddenly said, ”I … I am Liu Yizhou!”

Wei Xiaobao was startled, but before he could respond, Wu Lishen and Ao Biao shouted together, ”What nonsense are you talking about?”

”Gong-gong,” Liu Yizhou said, ”I am asking you to save me, please … please save us.”

Wu Lishen shouted loudly, ”Greedy for life, afraid of death; what kind of hero or warrior are you? Why should you open your mouth asking for help?”

Liu Yizhou said, ”He … he said Xiao Gongye and my Shifu asked … asked him to save … to save us.”

Wu Lishen shook his head and said, ”He's just trying to swindle us, and you believe him?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”Shaking Head Lion Wu Laoyezi [old master], when you look at my face, could you shake your head a little less?”

Wu Lishen was startled, ”You … you …” he said.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”And this gentleman Blue Haired Tiger Ao Biao, Ao Dage, is your proud disciple, isn't he? Famous master must produce outstanding disciple; my utmost admiration.” Wu Lishen and Ao Biao's countenance changed greatly; they were so surprised that they were at a loss.

From his pocket Wei Xiaobao produced the folded letter Fang Yi wrote. He unfolded it and held it in front of Liu Yizhou's face. He laughed and said, ”Look, who wrote this letter?”

As soon as Liu Yizhou looked, he was overjoyed; with a trembling voice he said, ”It's really Fang Shimei's [younger martial sister] handwriting. Wu Shishu, Fang Shimei said that this … this Gong-gong came to rescue us, she is telling me to obey him in everything.”

”Bring it here, let me look,” Wu Lishen said.

Wei Xiaobao held the letter in front of Wu Lishen; he thought, ”I wonder what words of love are written on it; my first wife has no sense of shame, she only wants to snatch a husband, she would write any overly romantic words of love.” He heard Wu Lishen read: ”'Liu Shige, Gui Gong-gong is one of us, his righteousness reaches the clouds and the sky, his action braves strange dangers, he has come to save, you must listen to Gui Gong-gong's directives to escape from the tiger's mouth. Younger sister Yi stated with her own hand.' Um, there is special mark of our Mu Palace at the top; it's actually not a fake.”

Hearing in the letter Fang Yi praised him with the words 'his righteousness meager[28] to the clouds and the sky', Wei Xiaobao was puzzled; he thought that the thicker the righteousness the better. When the righteousness is meager, it would only disappear into the air, what else there is to be left? But he had heard people saying those words several times before, so he knew it must be very good words of praise. He also heard that in the letter Fang Yi did not write any overly romantic words of love, he was even more delighted. ”What do you mean it's fake?” he asked.

”Gong-gong,” Liu Yizhou asked, ”Where is my Fang Shimei?”

In his heart Wei Xiaobao said, ”In my room.” But with his mouth he said, ”At this moment she is hiding in a very safe place. After I save you and take you out, I'll find a way to save her, so that you can meet her.”

Tears streaming down from Liu Yizhou's eyes, sobbing, he said, ”I don't know how to repay Gong-gong's great kindness and benevolence.” When a moment ago he heard Wei Xiaobao said that they were going to be beheaded right after eating and drinking, he was originally brave; but suddenly confronted with life juncture, his fear could not longer be restrained, and he blurted out that he was Liu Yizhou with the hope that in the face of imminent peril[29] he could somehow save his life. By the time he saw Fang Yi's letter, he found that the chance of survival looked promising, his joy was beyond description.

Yet when facing death Wu Lishen was without any fear; he still wanted to investigate thoroughly. ”May I know Sire's honorable surname and great given name?” he asked, ”Why are you willing to lend a hand?”

”I might as well explain everything clearly,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”All my friends call me Lai Li Tou Xiao Sanzi. Don't feel strange, I used to have skin disease and dysentery, but now I am healed. I have a good friend, the Xiangzhu of Green Wood Hall of Tian Di Hui, his name is Wei Xiaobao. He said that there is an old fellow in Tian Di Hui by the name of Eight-Arm Ape Xu Tianchuan, because of a dispute involving supporting Tang, supporting Gui, whatever, he killed your Mu Palace's Bai Hansong. The Mu Family's Xiao Gongye and Bai Hanfeng are unwilling to let the matter rest, but the dead can't come back to life. Without any other option, that Wei Xiaobao came and asked me to rescue the three of you, to compensate the Mu Palace, giving careful consideration to the yi qi between the two sides.”

Wu Lishen was fully aware of the dispute with Tian Di Hui, his suspicion gone instantly, he shook his head continuously, and then nodded, saying, ”So that's how it is. Just now Zaixia said some offensive words, I have offended you.”

”You are too kind!” Wei Xiaobao said, ”It's just that we must think of an ingenious way of escaping from the Palace.”

”Whatever way Gui Gong-gong thought must be ingenious,” Liu Yizhou said, ”We will obey your instructions.”

Wei Xiaobao mused, ”I haven't thought of any plan.” He asked Wu Lishen, ”What strategy does Wu Laoyezi have?”

”There are too many dog Imperial Bodyguards in the Palace,” Wu Lishen said, ”We can't break out in the daytime, we'll wait until night, you try to cut off the ox tendon binding our hands and feet, let us rush out and kill the enemy under the darkness.”

”This plan is wonderful,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”But I am afraid it is not extremely certain.” He paced back and forth in the room, pondering the best solution.

Ao Biao said, ”We'd better just make a dash out, if we fail, the worst that can happen is we die anyway.”

”Ao Shige,” Liu Yizhou said, ”Don't interrupt Gui Gong-gong's train of thought.” Ao Biao glared angrily at him.

Wei Xiaobao thought, ”It would be best to use some drug; if the Imperial Bodyguards are drugged, I don't have to harm any human life.” Walking out the room, he said to Zhang Kangnian, ”Zhang Dage, I want to use some drug, I wonder if you could fix some for me immediately?”

”Sure, sure,” Zhang Kangnian said with a laugh, ”Zhao Er Ge [second older brother] has some ready-made knockout drug; I'll get it right away.”

”Zhao Er Ge has some ready-made knockout drug?” Wei Xiaobao asked, ”Whatever for?”

Lowering his voice, Zhang Kangnian said, ”Not concealing anything from Gui Gong-gong; the day before yesterday Deputy Chief Rui ordered us to arrest somebody, he told us to do it quietly, not to make it known publicly. This man's martial art skill was profound, we were afraid that to fight him openly with saber and spear would mean sacrificing a lot of human lives; not only that, we would not be able to capture him alive, so Zhao Er Ge fixed some knockout drug to do the trick.”

Wei Xiaobao thought, ”Unable to defeat others, you use a dirty trick.” He asked, ”Was it a great success?”

”Stretch a hand and grab it,” Zhang Kangnian replied.

Hearing it was Rui Dong who sent them on a mission, Wei Xiaobao probed further, ”Who was it that you were supposed to arrest? What did he violate?”

”It was the Commander of the Bordered Red Banner Hochabo,” Zhang Kangnian replied, ”I heard he offended the Empress Dowager. After the Deputy Chief Rui arrested him, he forced Hochabo to hand over some kind of scripture; afterwards, he pasted a sheet of mulberry bark paper on his mouth and nose, and thus suffocated him to his death.”

”We do not know,” Zhang Kangnian replied, ”Let me go get the knockout drug.”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”I'll have to bother you some more: please tell the Catering Department to deliver two tables of top-notch feast here. I want to invite all brothers for a banquet.”

Zhang Kangnian happily said, ”Gong-gong wants to reward us with food and wine. As long as we follow Gong-gong, we won't have to worry about the lack of food and drink for the rest of our lives.”

Not too long afterwards, Zhang Kangnian was back with the knockout drug. It was packaged in a very large bundle, perhaps it was more than half a catty. In a low voice he said, ”This large bundle of drug is enough to put several hundred people to sleep. For only one person, take a little bit with a finger nail like this, mix it with tea or wine, it should be enough.” He then ordered the Imperial Bodyguards to move the table and arrange the stools, telling them it was Gui Gong-gong who bestow them the wine. The Imperial Bodyguards were delighted, they busily do the bidding.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”Set the banquet in the prisoner room. We are having a good time, let those three damn assassins watch and be jealous, I want them to drool.”

The banquet table set up, the eunuch manager of the imperial kitchen, leading several little eunuchs and 'sula' [Book note: The low-level, odd jobs servants in the Qing Palace were called 'sula' in the Manchu dialect.] arrived, carrying boxes of food on shoulder poles. They set the dishes and wine pots on the table.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”You, three rebellious thieves, have committed treason and heresy, your death is imminent, yet you still reluctant to admit your mistake. Right now you may watch your masters eating and drinking, if you can't endure your appetite, just bark like a dog, laoye will reward you with a piece of meat.” The crowd of Imperial Bodyguards burst out in laughter.

”Dog Imperial Bodyguards, stinky eunuch,” Wu Lishen cursed, ”Our Ping Xi Wang will soon dispatch troops from Yunnan all the way to attack Beijing, he will seize all of you, Imperial Bodyguards and a bunch of eunuchs, and will throw you into the river to feed the tortoises.”

Wei Xiaobao's right hand entered his pocket, his palm grabbed half a handful of knockout drug. With his left hand he picked up the wine pot, and walked toward Wu Lishen. Raising the wine pot he laughed and said, ”Rebellious thieve, do you want to drink wine?”

Wu Lishen did not understand Wei Xiaobao's intention, he said loudly, ”Drink or not, I don't care! When Ping Xi Wang's troops arrive, it will be difficult for you, little eunuch, to escape alive.”

With a cold laugh Wei Xiaobao said, ”That's not necessarily true!” Raising the wine pot high, he tossed his head backward, and poured the wine from high in the air into his open wide mouth. He swallowed a mouthful of wine and praised, ”Nice wine!” He positioned the wine pot in his left hand level with his chest and pushed the pot's lid aside with his right-hand's forefinger, and then spilled the knockout drug in the palm of his right hand into the pot, and quickly pushed the lid back. He raised the pot in his left hand again, and shook it continuously in the air, while saying with a laugh, ”Good rebellious thieve, death is near at hand, you still talk nonsense.” When he dropped the knockout drug into the pot, his body was covering the wine pot; other than Wu Lishen, nobody else saw him doing it. He shook the wine pot to mix the knockout drug with the wine.

Wu Lishen looked at Wei Xiaobao's eyes; he understood immediately, and was secretly delighted. With a loud voice he said, ”Real man looks at death in the eye, if I open my mouth to beg forgiveness, I am not a real man. Just give that pot of wine to me, laozi will drink it without a moment's hesitation.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”You want to drink wine, I am not going to give you any, ha ha, ha ha!” Turning around, he walked back to the banquet table and filled the Imperial Bodyguards' cups to the brim.

Zhang Kangnian and the guards all stood up, saying, ”We don't dare; how can we let Gong-gong pour the wine?”

”We are all brothers,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Why be so polite?” Raising his own cup, he said, ”Please, please!”

The Imperial Bodyguards were just about to drink the wine when suddenly there was a shout from the outside, ”The Empress Dowager summons Xiao Guizi. Is Xiao Guizi here?”

Wei Xiaobao was shocked. ”In here!” he replied, and put the wine cup down. He thought, ”The old wh0re is looking for me? What does she want?” as he walked outside to meet the newcomers. He saw four eunuchs; the leader was a big man with both his chest and belly sticking out, he looked rather impressive. Wei Xiaobao kneeled down immediately and said, ”Servant Xiao Guizi receives the imperial decree.”

The eunuch said, ”The Empress Dowager has something important for you; you are to report to the Palace of Compassionate and Peaceful immediately.”

”Yes, yes,” Wei Xiaobao replied. He stood up, while thinking, ”The drugged wine is already poured. As soon as I leave, naturally the Imperial Bodyguards will drink it immediately, then my trickery will be exposed. Nothing I can do about it. But I must not go to Palace of Compassionate and Peaceful. Do you think Palace of Compassionate and Peaceful is Lovely Spring Courtyard? Where the old wh0re invites moneybags, young and old?” Right now he had numerous Imperial Bodyguards by his side, so he was not afraid at all. He laughed and asked, ”Gong-gong, what's your honorable surname? How come we have never met before?”

”Humph!” the eunuch snorted; he said, ”My name is Dong Jinkui. Let's go now. The Empress Dowager is waiting, we have been looking for you for half of the day!”

Wei Xiaobao stepped forward and got hold of the eunuch's wrist, saying, ”Dong Gong-gong, come and see something interesting.” He pulled the eunuch toward the inside room.

Hearing it was something interesting, Dong Jinkui followed him inside. But as he entered the inner hall, he saw two banquet tables. ”Good!” he said in a loud voice, ”You live a very happy and prosperous life. Xiao Guizi, the Empress Dowager appointed you to be in charge of the Catering Department, yet you use your official authority for private interest, you are squandering the Empress Dowager and His Majesty's money.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”These Imperial Bodyguards brothers have rendered great service by capturing the thieves, His Majesty ordered me to reward all of them, from top to bottom. Come, come, come, Dong Gong-gong, and these three Gong-gong, please sit down and drink a cup.”

Dong Jinkui shook his head and said, ”I don't drink! The Empress Dowager summons you, why don't you quickly go?”

Wei Xiaobao said with a laugh, ”These Imperial Bodyguards officers are all good friends, if you do not even want to drink a cup with them, you will look down on them too much.”

”I don't drink wine,” Dong Jinkui said.

Wei Xiaobao turned to Zhang Kangnian and gave him a wink; he said, ”Zhang Dage, this Dong Gong-gong's arrogance is not small, he does not want to drink with us.”

Zhang Kangnian raised a cup and pushed it toward Dong Jinkui's hand; he said with a laugh, ”Dong Gong-gong, we all enjoy this reward together.” Dong Jinkui did not have any choice, he dried up a cup.

”Now that's what I call a good friend,” Wei Xiaobao said with a laugh, ”The other three Gong-gong must also drink a cup.” The three eunuchs received three cups from the Imperial Bodyguards' hands, they also drank the wine.

”Good!” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Now everybody accompany them by drinking a cup.” He poured wine into four more empty cups. The Imperial Bodyguards raised their cups and drank their wine.

When raising his cup, Wei Xiaobao used the sleeve of his left hand to cover the wine cup, when he tossed the cup, he poured the wine into his sleeve. Afraid that one cup was not potent enough, he wanted to pour another cup for everybody, but an Imperial Bodyguard took the wine pot from him and said, ”Let me pour!”

Dong Jinkui frowned and said, ”Gui Gong-gong, when we heard the Empress Dowager summons us, everybody would be on our feet and rush to answer. Why do you leisurely mind your own business by drinking wine? Aren't you being too disrespectful?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”Of course I have my reason. Come, come, come, everybody drink another cup, and then I'll explain.”

Zhang Kangnian raised his cup toward Dong Jinkui and said, ”Dong Gong-gong, please.”

”I don't have time to drink wine,” Dong Jinkui said, but when he said that, his body swayed slightly.

Wei Xiaobao knew the knockout drug in Dong Jinkui's stomach was about to take effect; he stooped down suddenly and cried out, ”Aiyo, my tummy hurts!”

The Imperial Bodyguards felt dizzy; someone cried out, ”What happened? Something's wrong with the wine!”

Wei Xiaobao shouted angrily, ”Dong Gong-gong, you received order from the Empress Dowager to reward us with poisonous wine, didn't you? Why did you put poison in the wine?”

Dong Jinkui was greatly shocked, with a trembling voice he said, ”There ... there's no such thing.”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”Your method is quite ruthless, you dare to poison the wine? Brothers, let us stake our lives to fight him.”

The Imperial Bodyguards were dizzy and light-headed, they were already at the brink of losing their consciousness. 'Crash! Bang!' Two of the eunuchs were already unable to withstand the power of the drug, they fell down first, followed by Dong Jinkui, Zhang Kangnian, the rest of the Imperial Bodyguards and the remaining eunuch crashed down one after another onto the tables and the chairs; it was very chaotic.

Wei Xiaobao rushed forward and landed a kick on Dong Jinkui's body. ”Ugh!” Dong Jinkui grunted, his hands and feet twitched, but he was unable to open his eyes. Wei Xiaobao was ecstatic; he rushed to close the door first, and then pulling his dagger, he stabbed Dong Jinkui and the three eunuchs on the chest. ”Ah!” Liu Yizhou cried out in great surprise. Wei Xiaobao used the dagger to cut off the ox tendon binding Wu Lishen, Liu Yizhou and Ao Biao's hands and feet. His dagger could cut iron like cutting mud, it cut the ox tendon like cutting noodles. Wu Lishen and the others, three people's martial art skill was not weak, especially Wu Lishen whose skill was very profound. Although they were tortured, it was no more than skin and flesh wound, their muscles and bones were not harmed at all.

”Gui Gong-gong,” Liu Yizhou said, ”How ... how are we going to go out?”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”Wu Laoyezi, Ao Shixiong, find Imperial Bodyguards whose statures are similar to yours, wear their uniforms. Liu Shixiong, you don't have any facial hair, you may disguise yourself as an eunuch, take this surnamed Dong's clothing.”

”Can I disguise myself as an Imperial Bodyguard?” Liu Yizhou asked.

”No, can't do! You must dress as an eunuch,” Wei Xiaobao said. Liu Yizhou did not dare to argue, he simply nodded. The three of them quickly changed their clothes.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”Come with me. No matter who talk with you, just act dumb, do not reply anything.” From his pocket he took out the dissolving powder. He pulled Dong Jinkui's body to the corner of the room. Using his dagger, he stabbed several times on the upper and lower parts of the corpse, and then sprinkled some powder on each hole to dissolve the body quicker. Only then did he open the door and led the three people out.

Once they were out of the Imperial Bodyguard building, he closed the door behind him, and walked directly toward the Catering Department.

The Catering Department was located east of the Heavenly Purity Palace, it was very close to the Imperial Bodyguard building, so they arrived in almost no time at all. They saw Boss Qian had already been waiting respectfully, his men were carrying two big pigs, already washed out and very clean.

Wei Xiaobao's countenance sank, ”Old Qian,” he shouted harshly, ”You are very unreasonable! I told you to bring several good pigs, not thin and dry like this, some old sows that look like they have given birth to seventeen, eighteen litters to skimp on Laozi. You ... you ... damn it, do you still want to eat?”

As he prattled on, Boss Qian bowed down in fear and repeatedly said, ”Yes!”

The eunuchs of the imperial kitchen saw that the two pigs Boss Qian brought were actually big and fat, but the details in which the goods was delivered was actually the only way the eunuch manager of the imperial kitchen took a cut. It did not matter if the cattle, sheep, chicken or duck you delivered was extremely superior, in the mouth of the eunuch manager of the imperial kitchen it all turned into a spoiled, low quality goods that even if it were given as alms to the beggars, nobody would want it. Only if the delivery was accompanied by a bag of money the spoiled, low quality goods would then turn into high-quality goods fit to be eaten by the Emperor or Empress Dowager. When the eunuchs heard Wei Xiaobao, it dawned on them what was going on; they echoed Wei Xiaobao, ”Take them out! These two pigs are stinky and rotten, they are only good to be used as fertilizer in the vegetable garden.”

Wei Xiaobao grew angrier, he waved his hand and said to Wu Lishen and the others, three people, ”Imperial Bodyguard brothers and Gonggong, please escort this fellow out, kick them out of the Palace altogether and don't let them come back in.”

Boss Qian did not know Wei Xiaobao's intention; showing his concern, he said, ”Gong-gong, please forgive me for this incident, Xiao ... Xiaoren will come back with fatter and bigger pigs, plus some meager ... meager gift for Gong-gong. This time ... I am asking Gong-gong to bear with me.”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”If I want pork, I will send someone to get you. Now go, get lost!”

Bowing deep, Boss Qian said, ”Yes, yes!”

The eunuchs of the imperial kitchen looked at each other with a smirk on their faces, they thought, ”If you have brought a gift, naturally Gui Gong-gong won't drive you away.”

Wu Lishen, Liu Yizhou and Ao Biao, three people followed behind Boss Qian, busily pushing him out of the kitchen. Wei Xiaobao also went out after them. When they reached the corridor, he looked around and after ascertaining that nobody else was around, he said in low voice, ”Qian Laoxiong [old brother], these three gentlemen are Mu Palace's heroes; the first one is none other than the renowned Shaking-head Lion Wu Laoyezi.”

”Ah!” Qian Laoben exclaimed, ”It's an honor to meet you at last,” he said happily, ”Zaixia did not turn my head to greet the three gentlemen, please do not hold it against me.”

Hearing that he was Wei Xiaobao's companion, Wu Lishen was delighted, and said busily, ”We are in a dangerous place, this ought to be so.”

”Qian Laoge [old brother],” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Please tell your honorable society's Wei Xiangzhu that Lai Li Tou Xiao Sanzi has accomplished the mission, please take these three good friends to see Mu Family's Xiao Gongye and Liu Laoyezi. As soon as these three friends left, the Palace will pursue the assassins immediately, you might not be able to enter the Palace anymore.”

”Yes, yes,” Qian Laoben said, ”My humble society, from top to bottom, is highly indebted to Gong-gong's kindness.”

Wu Lishen asked, ”So this Qian friend is from Tian Di Hui?”

”Exactly,” Boss Qian replied.

The five of them quickly walked toward the Shen Wu Gate. The guards on the gate saw Wei Xiaobao and respectfully asked his well-being, ”Gui Gong-gong, how are you?”

”Everybody, how are you?” Wei Xiaobao replied. Although the Imperial Bodyguards did not recognize Wu Lishen and the others, three people, seeing Wei Xiaobao was pulling Wu Lishen's right arm, nobody dared to ask anything.

The five of them left the Shen Wu Gate and walked several dozens more steps. Wei Xiaobao said, ”Zaixia will have to return to the Palace, I'm sure we will meet again someday. You don't need to be overly courteous.”

Wu Lishen said, ”We do not dare to hope for repaying your kindness in saving our lives. Hereafter if Tian Di Hui has any urgent business, the Old Wu and Old Ao, master and disciple, will go through water and tread on fire without hesitation.”

”I don't dare,” Wei Xiaobao said. He saw that Liu Yizhou, who was walking ahead in big strides, turning his head to look at them, as if blaming Wu Lishen for not walking quicker; this place was not far from the Palace Gate, they were not out of danger yet.

Wei Xiaobao smiled slightly, and walked back toward the Shen Wu Gate. He said to the Imperial Bodyguards at the Gate, ”That Gong-gong is the Empress Dowager's trusted aide, he said he is being sent on mission by the Empress Dowager, he asked me to personally escort those few men out of the Palace. Damn it, don't they know the way out?”

”They are so arrogant!” the Imperial Bodyguards replied, ”How can they dare to tire out Gui Gong-gong? Who do they think they are? The Prince[31]?”

Another Imperial Bodyguard said, ”Even the Prince will not ask Gui Gong-gong to personally escort him out.”

Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said, ”They are the Empress Dowager's envoy, they action is unfathomable, I have suspicion in my heart, but that eunuch showed me a decree in the Empress Dowager's personal handwriting, so we as the servants won't dare not to obey, right?”

”Yes, yes!” the Imperial Bodyguards replied, ”What can we do about it?”

Wei Xiaobao returned to the Imperial Bodyguard building and saw everyone was still unconscious, nobody awoke yet. He scooped a pot of cold water and splashed it onto Zhang Kangnian's head. Zhang Kangnian slowly woke up, he smiled and said. ”Gui Gong-gong, how could I be drunk that easily?” He was embarrassed as he sat up. As he saw the condition of the room, he was greatly shocked. ”How … how … those assassins … are they gone?” he said with a trembling voice.

Wei Xiaobao said, ”The Empress Dowager sent that surnamed Dong eunuch to drug us all, and took the three assassins away.”

The knockout drug was clearly coming from Zhang Kangnian who had personally fetched it and given it to Wei Xiaobao. When he heard this, he did not believe it the least bit, but the effect of the drug had not vanished completely, his mind was still muddled, he did not know how to reply.

”Zhang Dage,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”Chief Dolong secretly told you to let the assassins out, didn't he?”

Zhang Kangnian nodded. ”Chief Dolong said that it was His Majesty's secret order; after the assassins are released, we are to investigate who the rebellious thief boss is.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”That's right. But when the assassins escape from the Palace, are the guards watching over them guilty or not?”

Zhang Kangnian was startled. ”That … that … naturally we are guilty, but … but it was Chief Dolong himself who gave us the order. We are the subordinates, we only followed orders.”

”Did Chief Dolong give you any written order?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

Zhang Kangnian was even more startled. ”He … he did not,” he replied, ”He said it with his own mouth, why should … why should I need a written order? Chief Dolong said it was His Majesty's order.”

”Did Chief Dolong show you His Majesty's imperial edict in his own handwriting?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

”No … he did not,” Zhang Kangnian's voice trembled, ”Could it be … could it be that Chief Dolong did not tell the truth?” His entire body trembled, his teeth chattered, making a 'click, click' noise.

”Not that he did not tell the truth,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”I am only afraid Chief Dolong would not want to admit mistakes, at the last moment he might shift the blame on you; won't that be terrible? Zhang Dage, why did His Majesty want to set the assassins free?”

Zhang Kangnian said, ”Chief Dolong said that we want to extract the information on who is the mastermind behind this from the three assassins.”

”That is the truth,” Wei Xiaobao said, ”It's just that when the assassins escape from the Palace, and this matter is not investigated, even the assassins won't believe it. And then the mastermind behind them could not be found. Perhaps His Majesty would execute several people and announce it publicly, so that the assassins won't get suspicious.”

By saying this, Wei Xiaobao was not slandering the Emperor; Kangxi did order him to kill several Imperial Bodyguards to make the assassins believe him.

Zhang Kangnian was so frightened that he fell on his knees and cried out, ”Gong-gong, please save me!” While repeatedly kowtowed to Wei Xiaobao.

”Zhang Dage is overly courteous,” Wei Xiaobao said. He reached out to help him up, and said with a laugh, ”We have some friends readily available to take the blame. We'll shift the blame onto those four eunuchs' heads. We'll say they used knockout drug to drug us all and set the assassins free; won't that clear you from responsibility? When His Majesty hears that these four eunuchs were sent by the Empress Dowager, naturally he won't investigate it further. His Majesty did not really want to kill you, as long as there is someone to take the blame, we will cover up this matter of escaping assassins. His Majesty may even reward you.”

Zhang Kangnian was ecstatic, ”Wonderful, wonderful!” he cried out, ”Thank you Gong-gong, for your kindness in saving my life.”

Wei Xiaobao mused, ”Even if I did not save your life, but by not killing you with a stab when you were unconscious, I have actually shown you mercy. With his own golden mouth the Emperor has ordered me to kill several Imperial Bodyguards.” He said, ”Let us quickly awaken the brothers, we'll tell them that those four eunuchs have come to set the assassins free.”

”Yes, yes!” Zhang Kangnian replied, yet he was still unsure whether he could really escape the responsibility. In his frightened state, his limbs felt weak. He scooped up some cold water and revived the Imperial Bodyguards.

When they all heard that eunuch Dong Jinkui had drugged them, killed the other three eunuchs, and rescued the three assassins, they all broke into cursing and swearing. But in their hearts they all wondered, ”Why did the Empress Dowager want to release the assassins? Could it be that those assassins were sent by the Empress Dowager?” But since it involved the Empress Dowager, they only dared to ponder it in their hearts, nobody dared to voice their doubt publicly. By this time Dong Jinkui's body, as well as his clothes, had already vanished completely, they all assumed that he had led the assassins out of the Palace.

Wei Xiaobao returned to his own residence. As soon as he entered the inner room, Mu Jianping busily asked, ”Gui Dage, do you have any news?”

”Gui Dage does not have any news,” Wei Xiaobao replied, ”But Good Gege has some.”

Mu Jianping smiled and said, ”It's not me who is anxious about the news. The one who is anxious is the one who should call you Good Gege.”

A burst of redness appeared on Fang Yi's face. ”Good Xiongdi

[32]!” she said in a low voice, ”You are younger than I am, I'll just call you Good Xiongdi, is that alright?”

Wei Xiaobao sighed and said, ”My good wife has turned into my good Jiejie

[33], in an instant the hen has turned into a duck. It's alright. I have rescued him!”

Fang Yi sat up abruptly. With a trembling voice she said, ”You ... did you say my Liu Shige has been rescued out?”

Wei Xiaobao said, ”A real man gave his words, some horses cannot chase it. I promised you I would rescue him, naturally I did.”

”How ... how did you save him?” Fang Yi asked.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, ”A recluse sage possesses a brilliant scheme. Next time you see your Shige, he can tell you in person.”

Fang Yi heaved a deep sigh, she raised her head toward the ceiling and said, ”Thank the Heaven and thank the Earth, it is indeed Bodhisattva's blessing.”

Seeing Fang Yi's expression, which clearly showed her delight from the bottom of her heart, Wei Xiaobao was enraged, he snorted softly, and no longer said anything.

Mu Jianping said, ”Shijie, you thank the Heaven and thank the Earth, and thank Bodhisattva, how come you did not thank the Good Xiongdi?”

Fang Yi said, ”Good Xiongdi's great benevolence and kindness cannot be repaid by simply saying one 'thank you'.”

Listening to her, Wei Xiaobao's cheerful mood returned; ”You don't need to repay me,” he said.

”Good Xiongdi, did Liu Shige say anything?” Fang Yi asked.

”He did not say much,” Wei Xiaobao replied, ”He only asked me to save him.”

”Um, did he ask about us?” Fang Yi asked.

Wei Xiaobao cocked his head to think, then he said, ”He did not. I told him that you are in a very safe place, and that he doesn't have to worry, soon I may send you out to meet him.”

Fang Yi nodded. ”Yes!” she said. Suddenly two lines of tears flowing down her cheeks.

”Shijie,” Mu Jianping said, ”Why are you crying?”

Fang Yi said with a sob, ”I ... I am so happy in my heart.”

Wei Xiaobao said in his heart, ”Damn it, for that pretty boy[34] Liu Yizhou you are this happy, laozi does not like to look at this tumultuous wave too much. Xiao Xuanzi told me to investigate the mastermind behind the assassination attempt, I'd better go out to fool around a little bit, then come back to report to him.”

Leaving the Palace immediately, he strolled leisurely around the Heavenly Bridge area.