Part 23 (1/2)

A man aroused his wife from a sound sleep, the other night, saying that he had seen a ghost in the shape of a donkey.

”Oh! let me sleep,” the irate dame rejoined, ”and don't be frightened at your own shadow.”

”What a fearful night I had when I drew this gun the first time!”

said the bartender, as he showed a handsome silver-mounted Colt.

”When was it?” gasped the crowd.

”Night before last at the raffle in Kelley's!”

”Gee whizz!” said the boy who had been forced to take castor oil.

”I do wish ma was a Christian Scientist!”

If you want to see a strong organization, look at the whisky dealers; if you want to see a weak one, look at the consumers.

With cards and dice, and dress and friends, My savings are complete; I light the candle at both ends, And thus make both ends meet.

”There goes a man who leads in letters.”

”Ah, indeed! What's his name?”

”A.A. Adams.”

Lawyers practice at the bar, while bartenders and mosquitoes practice inside of it.

A squall on the sea is a stress of weather, and a squaller on land is a songstress.

Adversity is not without comfort--your enemy may be in harder luck than you.