Part 9 (1/2)
JOHNNIE--”Ya-as, I've just come back from Ireland--County Cork.
Ever been to Cork?”
SOUBRETTE--”No--but I've seen a good many drawings of it.”
”What is love?”
”A fresh egg.”
”Marriage?”
”Hard boiled eggs.”
”Divorce?”
”Scrambled eggs.”
How by the statesman insincere Man's weary soul is vexed.
He'll shake your hand one minute and He'll pull your leg the next!
”Hush, not so loud! We're having a conference of the powers.”
”Eh! Who is conferring?”
”My wife, my mother-in-law and the cook.”
”I saw De Castro, the magician, make a $20 gold piece disappear in three minutes.” ”That's nothing. You ought to see my wife with a $20 bill at a church bazaar.”
An art-school student recently painted the picture of a dog under a tree so lifelike that it was impossible to distinguish the bark of the tree from that of the dog.
LADY--Why do you remove your sword, Lieutenant?