Part 6 (1/2)
”Only--you've been thinking that we're not quite good enough for you--that we'd soil your Trojan carpets and chairs--that we'd stain your Trojan relations. I--I know--I----”
And then she broke down altogether. She was kneeling by the table with her head in her arms, sobbing as though her heart would break.
”Oh, I say, Dahlia, don't! I can't bear to see you cry--it will be all right, old girl, to-morrow--it will really--and then you will see that it was wiser. You will thank me for speaking about it. Of course we'll always be good friends. I----”
”Robin, you don't mean it. You can't!” She had risen from her knees and now stood by him, timidly, with one hand on his arm. ”You have forgotten all those splendid times at Cambridge. Don't you remember that evening on the Backs? Just you and I alone when there was that man singing on the other side of the water, when you said that we would be like that always--together. Oh, Robin dear, it can't have been all nothing to you.”
She looked very charming with her eyes a little wet and her hair a little dishevelled. But his resolution must not weaken--now that he had progressed so far, he must not go back. But he put his arm round her.
”Really, old girl, it is better--for both of us. We can wait. Perhaps in a few years' time it will seem different again. We can think about it then. I don't want to seem selfish, but you must think about me a little. You must see how hard it has been for me to say this, and that it has only been with the greatest difficulty that I've been strong enough. Believe me, dear, it is harder for me than it is for you--much harder.”
He was really getting on very well. He had had no idea that he would do it so nicely. Poor girl! it was hard luck--perhaps he had led her to expect rather too much--those letters of his had been rather too warm, a little indiscreet. But no doubt she would marry some excellent man of her own cla.s.s--in a few years she would look back and wonder how she had ever had the fortune to know so intimately a man of Robin's rank! Meanwhile, the scene had better end as soon as possible.
She had let him keep his arm round her waist, and now she suddenly leant back and looked up in his face.
”Robin, darling,” she whispered, ”you can't mean it--not that we should part like this. Why, think of the times that we have had--the splendid, glorious times--and all that we're going to have. Think of all that you've said to me, over and over again----”
She crept closer to him. ”You love me really, dear, all the same.
It's only that some one's been talking to you and telling you that it's foolish. But that mustn't make any difference. We're strong enough to face all the world. You know that you said you were in the summer, and I'm sure that you are now. Wait till to-morrow, dear, and you'll see it all differently.”
”I tell you n.o.body's been talking,” he said, drawing his arm away.
”Besides, if they did, it wouldn't make any difference. No, Dahlia, it's got to stop. We're too young to know, and besides, it would be absurd anyway. I know it's bad luck on you. Perhaps I said rather too much in the summer. But of course we'll always be good friends. I know you'll see it as I do in a little time. We've both been indiscreet, and it's better to draw back now than later--really it is.”
”Do you mean it, Robin?”
She stood facing him with her hands clenched; her face was white and her eyes were blazing with fury.
”Yes, of course,” he said. ”I think it's time this ended----”
”Not before I've told you what I think of you,” she cried. ”You're a thief and a coward--you've stolen a girl's love and then you're afraid to face the world--you're afraid of what people will say. If you don't love me, you're tied to me, over and over again. You've made me promises--you made me love you--and now when your summer amus.e.m.e.nt is over you fling me aside--you and your fine relations! Oh! you gentlemen! It would be a good thing for the world if we were rid of the whole lot of you! You coward! You coward!”
He was taken aback by her fury.
”I say--Dahlia--” he stammered, ”it's unfair----”
”Oh! yes!” she broke in, ”unfair, of course, to you! but nothing to me--nothing to me that you stole my love--robbed me of it like a common thief--pretended to love me, promised to marry me, and now--now--Oh!
unfair! yes, always for the man, never for the girl--she doesn't count!
She doesn't matter at all. Break her heart and fling it away and n.o.body minds--it's as good as a play!”
She burst into tears, and stood with her head in her hands, sobbing as though her heart would break. It was a most distressing scene!
”Really, really, Dahlia,” said Robin, feeling extremely uncomfortable (it was such a very good thing, he thought, that none of his friends could see him), ”it's no use your taking it like this. I had better go--we can't do any good by talking about it now. To-morrow, when we can look at it calmly, it will seem different.”
He moved to the door, but she made another attempt and put her hand timidly on his arm to stop him.
”No, no, Robin, I didn't mean what I said--not like that. I didn't know what I was saying. Oh, I love you, dear, I love you! I can't let you go like that. You don't know what it means to me. You are taking everything from me--when you rob a girl of her love, of her heart, you leave her nothing. If you go now, I don't care what happens to me--death--or worse, That's how you make a bad woman, Robin. Taking her love from her and then letting her go. You are taking her soul!”
But he placed her gently aside. ”Nonsense, Dahlia,” he said. ”You are excited to-night. You exaggerate. You will meet a man much worthier than myself, and then you will see that I was right.”