Part 8 (1/2)
”Then send him,” said the editor.
Grand Duke Vodkakoff's turn at the Magnum Palace of Varieties started every evening at ten sharp. He topped the bill. Clarence, having been detained by a review of the Scouts, did not reach the hall till five minutes to the hour. He got to the dressing-room as the general was going on to the stage.
The Grand Duke dressed in the large room with the other male turns. There were no private dressing-rooms at the Magnum. Clarence sat down on a basket-trunk belonging to the Premier Troupe of Bounding Zouaves of the Desert, and waited. The four athletic young gentlemen who composed the troupe were dressing after their turn. They took no notice of Clarence.
Presently one Zouave spoke.
”Bit off to-night, Bill. Cold house.”
”Not 'arf,” replied his colleague. ”Gave me the s.h.i.+vers.”
”Wonder how his nibs'll go.”
Evidently he referred to the Grand Duke.
”Oh, 'e's all right. They eat his sort of sw.a.n.k. Seems to me the profession's going to the dogs, what with these bloomin' amytoors an' all. Got the 'airbrush, 'Arry?”
Harry, a tall, silent Zouave, handed over the hairbrush.
Bill continued.
”I'd like to see him go on of a Monday night at the old Mogul. They'd soon show him. It gives me the fair 'ump, it does, these toffs coming in and taking the bread out of our mouths. Why can't he give us chaps a chance? Fair makes me rasp, him and his bloomin' eight hundred and seventy-five o' goblins a week.”
”Not so much of your eight hundred and seventy-five, young feller me lad,” said the Zouave who had spoken first. ”Ain't you seen the rag this week?”
”Naow. What's in it? How does our advert, look?”
”Ow, that's all right, never mind that. You look at 'What the Encore Would Like to Know.' That's what'll touch his nibs up.”
He produced a copy of the paper from the pocket of his great-coat which hung from the door, and pa.s.sed it to his bounding brother.
”Read it out, old sort,” he said.
The other took it to the light and began to read slowly and cautiously, as one who is no expert at the art.
”'What the Encore would like to know:-Whether Prince Otto of Saxe-Pfennig didn't go particularly big at the Lobelia last week? And Whether his success hasn't compelled Agent Quhayne to purchase a larger-sized hat? And Whether it isn't a fact that, though they are press-agented at the same figure, Prince Otto is getting fifty a week more than Grand Duke Vodkakoff? And If it is not so, why a little bird has a.s.sured us that the Prince is being paid five hundred a week and the Grand Duke only four hundred and fifty? And, In any case, whether the Prince isn't worth fifty a week more than his Russian friend?' Lumme!”
An awed silence fell upon the group. To Clarence, who had dictated the matter (though the style was the editor's), the paragraph did not come as a surprise. His only feeling was one of relief that the editor had served up his material so well. He felt that he had been justified in leaving the more delicate literary work to that master-hand.
”That'll be one in the eye,” said the Zouave Harry. ”'Ere, I'll stick it up opposite of him when he comes back to dress. Got a pin and a pencil, some of you?”
He marked the quarter column heavily, and pinned it up beside the looking-gla.s.s. Then he turned to his companions.
”'Ow about not waiting, chaps?” he suggested. ”I shouldn't 'arf wonder, from the look of him, if he wasn't the 'aughty kind of a feller who'd cleave you to the bazooka for tuppence with his bloomin' falchion. I'm goin' to 'urry through with my dressing and wait till to-morrow night to see how he looks. No risks for Willie!”
The suggestion seemed thoughtful and good. The Bounding Zouaves, with one accord, bounded into their clothes and disappeared through the door just as a long-drawn chord from the invisible orchestra announced the conclusion of the Grand Duke's turn.
General Vodkakoff strutted into the room, listening complacently to the applause which was still going on. He had gone well. He felt pleased with himself.