Part 22 (1/2)

As soon as I had settled myself in London I took the earliest opportunity of calling upon Dawson at the Yard. He was absent, but his Deputy, who knew my name, received me kindly. He explained that it would not be easy to find Dawson. ”We never know where he is or what he is doing. I suppose that the Chief knows; certainly no one else.

How can one be Deputy to a man who never tells one what he is doing or where he may be found?” I agreed that the post seemed difficult to fill adequately. ”I wish I could chuck it as Froissart did when he went back to Paris. Have you ever seen Madame Gilbert?” he inquired eagerly. I observed that Madame did me the honour to be my friend. ”So you know her, do you? She's a clinker of a woman. Hot stuff, but a real genuine clinker. She could do what she pleased with old man Dawson; make him fetch and carry like a poodle. She's the only woman born who ever turned Dawson round her fingers.” I observed rather stiffly that Madame Gilbert was a lady for whom I had a very high regard, and that the expression ”Hot stuff” was hardly respectful.

”Hum!” said the Deputy, eyeing me with interest. ”So she has made a fool of you like she has of the rest of us. Even the Chief gets down on his rheumaticky old knees and kisses the carpet of his room after she has trodden on it.”

The Deputy tended to become garrulous, and I cut him short with an inquiry for Dawson's exact address. He lived in Acacia Villas, but I was without the precise number. The Deputy told me, and promised to inform Dawson of my visit at the earliest moment. ”It may be to-day, or next week, or next month. It may not be till the War is over”--an expression which has come into colloquial use as a synonym for the Greek Kalends. I thanked the officer, and withdrew somewhat annoyed.

It appeared that Dawson was not far away, for a letter from him reached me two days later at my club. It was an invitation to visit his home and to dine with him on the following Sunday at one o'clock.

Enclosed was a plan designed to a.s.sist me in penetrating the mazes of Tooting. That Sunday was a beautiful day in May, and I wandered down with plenty of time to spare to provide against the danger of being ”bushed.” But with the aid of Dawson's thoughtful plan I found Primrose Road without difficulty. The hour was then 12.15, and the house deserted. Dawson and his family were at chapel. I had forgotten what I had heard months before of Dawson's fervour as a preacher upon Truth until reminded of it by a constable whose beat pa.s.sed the house.

”If you are looking for Chief Detective Inspector Dawson,” said he, ”I can show you where to find him in chapel. He will be holding forth just now.” The opportunity of seeing Dawson as he really was--known certainly only to his wife and to G.o.d--and of seeing him as a preacher, spurred me into active interest. ”My relief is coming now,”

said the constable; ”as soon as I have handed over I will show you the way.”

As we walked together the policeman revealed to me the admiration inspired by Dawson in his humble subordinates. ”There is nothing that man can't do,” said he. ”He is a skilled mechanic, a soldier--some say he has a general's uniform hid away in his house--an electrical engineer, and a telegraph operator. He has been all over the world in the Royal Navy, and could if he liked be commanding a s.h.i.+p now. He's the friend of Ministers and Secretaries of State. He's the best detective that the Yard ever knew, and he preaches to folk here like--like the Archangel Gabriel come to trot 'em off to h.e.l.l. I'm a Wesleyan, myself, but I often go to hear the Chief Inspector. He makes one come out in a cold sweat, and gives a man a fine appet.i.te for dinner. He shakes you up so that you feel empty,” he explained.

I observed that if Dawson were so great a stimulus upon appet.i.te, he would not be popular with the Food Controller. The policeman, though he had heard of the Food Controller, was unconscious of his many activities, which shows how little the world knows of its greatest men. It also suggests that police constables do not read newspapers.

The chapel was a building ill.u.s.trative of the straight line and plane.

It was fairly large, and so full that the crowd of wors.h.i.+ppers bulged out of the doors. Though we could not force our way inside, we could hear the booming of a voice which was scarcely recognisable as that of Dawson. Waves of emotion ran so strongly through the congregation that we could feel them beat against the fringes by the doors. ”The Chief Inspector is on his game to-day,” whispered the constable. ”He's. .h.i.tting them fine.” From which I judged that the constable had in his youth come from the north, where golf is cheap. It was a disappointment that I could not get in, but perhaps well for the reader. The temptation to record a genuine sermon by Dawson might have proved too much for me. Presently the voice ceased to boom, the congregation squeezed out hot and oily, like grease from a full barrel, and I waited for Dawson to appear. ”Don't speak to him now,”

directed my guide. ”Let him get up to his house. He can't talk for half an hour after holding forth; there's not a word bad or good left in his carcase.”

After all the wors.h.i.+ppers had gone there issued forth a party of three: a man, a woman, and a little girl. ”There he is,” said the constable, nudging me. ”Who?” asked I. ”The Chief Inspector. There he is with Mrs. Dawson and their little girl.” I stared and stared, but failed to recognise my friend of the north. I was too far away to see his ears, and his face was quite strange to me.

”I hope,” I whispered primly to the constable, ”that Mrs. Dawson is sure he is her husband.”

”She ought to be. Aren't you sure?”

”Not yet; I am not near enough to see properly. That Dawson, is not a bit like those others whom I know.”

”That Dawson! Those others! Is there more than one Chief Inspector Dawson?” asked the man, wondering.

”I should say about a hundred,” replied I, and left him gasping. I fear that he now thinks that either I am quite mad or that Mrs. Dawson is a pluralist in husbands.

I gave the Dawson family sufficient time to reach their home, and to recover the power of speech, and then walked gravely to the door as if I had just arrived. One becomes contagiously deceptive in the vicinity of Dawson.

The stranger, who was the real undisguised Dawson, welcomed me to his home. The house was a small one and the family kept no servant. I do not know what income the Chief Inspector draws from the Yard, but am sure that it is absurdly inadequate to his services. The higher one rises, the less work one does and the more pay one gets--provided that one begins more than half-way up the ladder. For those like Dawson who begin quite at the bottom, the rule seems to be inverted: the more work one does, the less pay one gets. I should judge my own ill-gotten income at twice or three times that of Dawson--which even that cautious judge, Euclid, would declare to be absurd.