Part 28 (2/2)

Ted hastened to be apologetic.

”I'm beastly sorry,” he said, and cleared his throat again.

”I--I wish you would explain,” she went on.

”Oh, that's all right, isn't it?” said Ted vaguely.

”It isn't all right; you know it isn't,” she cried. ”What makes you so strange to me? You've never looked like that before. Is it I who have changed you so, Ted?”

”Oh, it's nothing,” he said. ”You've hit me up rather, that's all.

Don't bother about me. Did you want me for anything particular?”

She looked in vain for any signs of relenting in his manner; but he sat on the edge of the sofa, and played with his walking-stick, and cleared his throat at intervals. In spite of the changed conditions of their att.i.tude towards one another, she felt that she was expected, as usual, to take the initiative.

”I wanted to tell you all about it, to explain,” she faltered. ”I thought you would help me.”

”If it's all the same to you, I would rather not hear,” said Ted, with unexpected prompt.i.tude. ”I know as much about it as I care to know, thanks. _He_ wrote to me this morning, too.”

”He wrote to you? Paul?”

”Wilton, yes,” he replied, shortly, and glanced at her again. His under lip was twitching, as it always did when he was hurt or embarra.s.sed.

”What for?” she asked, wonderingly.

”Oh, to explain, and all that! Hang the explanation! I didn't want him to tell me he hadn't been a blackguard; I knew you,--so that was all square. But I don't understand it now, and I don't want to. I can't see any great shakes, myself, in playing about with a girl when you're engaged to some one else. But I suppose that's because I'm such a rotten a.s.s. It's none of my business, any way; only, I think you'd better be careful. But you know best, so that's all right.”

Again she longed to tell him that she was not so bad as he thought her, and yet, much worse than he thought her; but the words would not come, and she sat self-condemned.

”You don't understand,” she stammered presently. ”I didn't know he was engaged till yesterday. I saw no harm in it all; I only liked him very much, as a friend. I liked you in quite a different way, I--”

”You didn't know he was engaged?” said Ted, rousing himself suddenly.

”Do you mean to say he has been playing fast and loose with you, the blackguard? If I had thought that--”

”No, no!” she cried, in alarm at the fierceness of his expression. ”He never treated me badly; he made everything quite clear from the beginning. It was my fault if I misunderstood him. But I never did; I always knew we were just friends, and it was pleasant, and I let it go on. Haven't you and I been friends, too, Ted? There was no harm in that, was there?”

”Oh, no,” he said, bitterly. ”There was no fear of any harm in it!”

She realised his meaning, and blushed painfully as she felt that he had spoken the truth.

”Ted, do you hate me, I wonder?” she murmured.

”What? Oh, that's all right. Don't bother about me. I was a rotten a.s.s ever to expect anything else.”

”But, I mean, because--because of the other?” she went on anxiously.

Ted bit his lip, but did not speak.

”Do you think it was wrong of me?” she pleaded. ”Ted, tell me! I didn't know; I didn't really. It seemed quite right to me; I couldn't see that it mattered, just because of what people said. Would you think it wrong of a girl to come and see you, if she liked coming, and didn't care what people said?”

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