Part 3 (1/2)
He fought the anger that automatically surged up in him when the thought about his marriage, about Lydia. In the past year, his sense of fair play had compelled him to examine his marriage honestly and he had to admit that Lydia hadn't been a horrible shrew. He hadn't been a terrible husband. Their marriage hadn't ended because he and his ex-wife were bad people, but because they'd hit a crossroad that neither had antic.i.p.ated. A crossroad where there had been no choice but to separate. They had once been the love of each other's life, yet when their marriage had begun to crumble, they'd both forgotten the eight good years, only remembered their horrible final year, and fought bitterly. They'd hurt each other. Used Cory as a weapon. And both of them had walked away damaged.
Remembering that only made his upcoming showdown with Grace more formidable. He and Grace didn't have two years of courts.h.i.+p and six years of marriage to look back on to potentially keep them from hurting each other. So how did he expect their confrontation to turn out any better than his fight with Lydia had?
He didn't.
He wouldn't s.h.i.+rk his responsibility to Grace's baby. But he had learned enough from the past that the key to survival was not being so in love with his daughter that she could turn into Grace's secret weapon.
Finally feeling that he knew what he had to do, Danny rose from the step, went to the kitchen and told his housekeeper he and Grace weren't to be disturbed, then he walked to the den.
Unfortunately he couldn't keep the displeasure out of his voice when he said, ”Let me see her.”
Grace faced him. ”Save your anger, Danny. I was the one left to have this baby alone. I was so sick I had to quit my job and depend on my parents to basically nurse me for nine months. The bonus you gave me went to support me until I had Sarah and could go back to work. I was sick, exhausted and worried that if anything went wrong when she was born I wouldn't be able to pay for proper care. You could have helped me through all of that, but you never even followed up on me. So the way I see this, you don't have anything to complain about.”
She was right, of course. It didn't matter that he was still hurting from the end of his marriage when she told him she was pregnant. He hadn't for two seconds considered Grace or her feelings. Still, he had no proof that she was the innocent victim she wanted him to believe she was. The weekend they'd spent together, he'd made himself an easy mark for a woman he really didn't know. He'd never wanted another relations.h.i.+p, let alone a child. And now he had one with a stranger. A woman he genuinely believed had tricked him.
”What made it all worse was wondering about your reaction when I did bring Sarah to you.” She sat on the leather sofa in the conversation area, laid the gurgling baby on the cus.h.i.+on and pulled the bonnet ribbon beneath the little girl's chin, untying the bow.
Danny's breathing stuttered as he stared at the baby. His daughter. A perfect little pink bundle of joy. She punched and pedaled her legs as Grace removed her bonnet.
Grace's voice softly intruded into his thoughts. ”I understood when you told me you didn't want to see me anymore. I had every intention of respecting that, if only because of pride. But this baby was both of our doing.”
Sarah spit out her pacifier and began to cry.
Grace lifted the little girl from the sofa cus.h.i.+on and smoothed her lips across her forehead. ”I know. I know,” she singsonged. ”You're hungry.”
She rose and handed the baby to Danny. ”Can you take her while I get her bottle?”
Panic skittered through him and he backed away. He hadn't held a baby since Cory.
To his surprise Grace laughed. ”Come on. She won't bite. She doesn't have teeth yet.”
”I've...I'm...I just-”
Realizing he was behaving like an idiot, Danny stopped stuttering. He wasn't an idiot. And he would always think of Cory every time he looked at Sarah, but there was no way he'd admit that to Grace. She already knew enough about him and he didn't know half as much about her. Seeing Cory every time he looked at Sarah would be his cross to bear in private.
He reached out to take the baby, but this time Grace pulled her back.
”Sit,” she said as if she'd thought his hesitancy was uncertainty about how to hold the baby. ”I'll hand her to you.”
Deciding not to argue her a.s.sumption, Danny lowered himself to the sofa and Grace placed the baby in his arms. ”Just set her bottom on your lap, and support her back with your left hand.”
He did that and the baby blinked up at him, her crying becoming sniffles as she lost herself to confusion about the stranger holding her.
Staring at her mutely, Danny identified. The first time he'd seen Cory was immediately after he'd slid into the doctor's hands. He'd been purple and wrinkled and when the doctor slapped his tiny behind he'd shrieked like a banshee. The little girl on Danny's lap was clean and now quiet. The total opposite of her half brother.
Grace pulled a bottle from her diaper bag. Dripping formula onto her wrist, she checked the bottle's temperature and said, ”Can I take this to your kitchen and warm it?”
”Go back to the foyer, then turn right. The door at the end of the hall leads to the kitchen. My housekeeper is there. She'll help you.”
Grace nodded and left.
Danny glanced down at the blue-eyed, rather bald baby. He took a breath. She blinked at him again, as if still confused.
”I'm your father.”
She c.o.c.ked her head to the right. The same way Cory used to. Especially when Danny would tell him anything about Carson Services, about responsibility, about carrying on the family name, as if the idea of doing anything other than paint was absurd.
Remembering Cory's reaction tightened Danny's chest again, but this time it wasn't from the memory of how, even as a small child, Cory had seemed to reject the idea of taking over the family business. Danny suddenly realized this little girl was now the one in line to run Carson Services. Grace might not know it, but Danny did.
Grace ran to the kitchen and didn't find a housekeeper, but she did locate a microwave into which she quickly shoved the bottle. She'd never seen a person more uncomfortable with a baby than Danny appeared to be, which was surprising considering he had a son, but she wasn't so insensitive that she didn't realize that meeting Sarah hadn't been easy for him.
She'd been preoccupied with Sarah's needs and hadn't factored Danny's shock into the equation. But having watched his facial expression s.h.i.+ft and change, she realized that though he might not have believed Grace when she told him she was pregnant he seemed to be accepting that Sarah was his.
When the timer bell rang, she grabbed the bottle and headed back to his den. Walking down the hall she heard Danny's soft voice.
”And that's why mutual funds are better for some people.”
Grace stopped just outside the door.
”Of course, there are times when it's more logical to put the money of a conservative investor in bonds. Especially a nervous investor. Somebody who can't afford to take much risk. So you always have to question your investor enough that you can determine the level of risk his portfolio and personality can handle.”
Standing by the wall beside the door, Grace twisted so she could remain hidden as she peered inside. Sarah gripped Danny's finger and stared up at him. Her blue eyes sharp and alert. Danny appeared comfortable, too, holding the baby loosely on his lap, and Grace realized that talking about something familiar was how Danny had overcome his apprehensions. Still, stocks? Poor Sarah!
”It's all about the individual. Some people are afraid of the stock market. Which is another reason mutual funds are so great. They spread the risk over a bunch of stocks. If one fails, another stock in the fund could skyrocket and balance everything out.”
If it had been under any other circ.u.mstances, Grace would have burst out laughing. Danny looked up and saw her standing there. He grimaced. ”Sorry. I didn't know what else to talk about.”
She shrugged. ”I guess it doesn't really matter. All a baby really cares about is hearing your voice.” She walked into the room and lifted Sarah from Danny's lap. Nestling the baby into the crook of her arm, she added, ”When in doubt, make up something. Maybe a story about a bunny or a bear. Just a short little anything.”
Danny didn't reply, but rose and walked to the window. ”You should be the one to sit.”
Not about to remind him that there was plenty of s.p.a.ce for both of them on the leather sofa, Grace took the place he had vacated. With two silent parents, the sound of Sarah greedily sucking filled the room.
”I almost wish you hadn't brought her to me.”
Grace hadn't forgotten that he'd broken up with her before she told him she was pregnant. Still, that was his tough luck. He'd created a child and she wasn't letting him pretend he hadn't.
”She's your child.”
”Yes. And I know you think there are all kinds of reasons that's great, but you're not going to like the way this has to play out.”
”The way this has to play out?”
”I have to raise my daughter.”
Not expecting that, Grace stared at his stiff back. But rather than be offended by his defiant stance, she remembered the feeling of his corded muscles beneath her fingertips. The firmness of his skin. Her own s.h.i.+vers of delight from having his hands on her.
Reaction flared inside her but she quickly shook it off. She wouldn't let herself fall victim to his charm again. Too much was at stake. She didn't know the official definition of ”raise his daughter,” but it sounded as if he intended to get more than a Sat.u.r.day afternoon with Sarah every other weekend. There was no way Grace would let him take Sarah and ignore her. He hadn't ever wanted her. If he took her now, it would probably be out of a sense of duty to his family.