Volume Iv Part 82 (1/2)

[_Whiff_ sits on the Ground with a Bottle of Brandy.

_Whim._ A Morsel, a Morsel.

_Well._ I am for an attack, what say you, Gentlemen, to an attack?--What, silent all? What say you, Major?

_Dull._ I say, Sir, I hope my Courage was never in dispute. But, Sir, I am going to marry Colonel _Downright's_ Daughter here--and should I be slain in this Battle 'twould break her Heart;--besides, Sir, I should lose her Fortune.

[Speaks big.

_Well._ I'm sure here's a Captain will never flinch. [To _Whim._

_Whim._ Who, I, an't like your Honour?

_Well._ Ay, you.

_Whim._ Who, I? ha, ha, ha: Why, did your Honour think that I would fight?

_Well._ Fight! yes; why else do you take Commissions?

_Whim._ Commissions! Oh Lord, O Lord, take Commissions to fight! ha, ha, ha; that's a jest, if all that take Commissions should fight--

_Well._ Why do you bear Arms then?

_Whim._ Why, for the Pay; to be called Captain, n.o.ble Captain, to show, to c.o.c.k and look big, and bluff as I do: to be bow'd to thus as we pa.s.s, to domineer and beat our Soldiers: Fight, quoth a, ha, ha, ha.

_Friend._ But what makes you look so simply, Cornet?

_Tim._ Why, a thing that I have quite forgot, all my Accounts for _England_ are to be made up, and I'm undone if they be neglected--else I wou'd not flinch for the stoutest he that wears a Sword-- [Looking big.

_Down._ What say you, Captain _Whiff_? [_Whiff_ almost drunk.

_Whiff._ I am trying, Colonel, what Mettle I'm made on; I think I am valiant, I suppose I have Courage, but I confess 'tis a little of the D---- breed, but a little inspiration from the Bottle, and the leave of my _Nancy_, may do wonders.

Enter a _Seaman_ in haste.

_Sea._ An't please your Honours, _Frightall's_ Officers have seiz'd all the s.h.i.+ps in the River, and rid now round the Sh.o.r.e, and had by this time secur'd the sandy Beach, and landed Men to fire the Town, but that they are high in drink aboard the s.h.i.+p call'd the Good-Subject; the Master of her sent me to let your Honours know, that a few Men sent to his a.s.sistance will surprize them and retake the s.h.i.+ps.

_Well._ Now, Gentlemen, here is a brave occasion for Emulation--why writ not the Master?

_Dull._ Ay, had he writ, I had soon been amongst them, i'faith; but this is some Plot to betray us.

_Sea._ Keep me here, and kill me if it be not true.

_Down._ He says well--there's a Brigantine and a Shallop ready, I'll embark immediately.

_Friend._ No, Sir, your Presence is here more necessary, let me have the Honour of this Expedition.

_Haz._ I'll go your Volunteer, _Charles_.

_Well._ Who else offers to go?

_Whim._ A mere Trick to kidnap us, by _Bacon_,--if the Captain had writ.