Volume Iii Part 69 (1/2)

Sir _Cau_. No disturbance to serve a Friend--

Sir _Feeb_. I think I am your Friend indeed, Sir _Cautious_, or I wou'd not have been here upon my Wedding-Night.

Sir _Cau_. His Wedding-Night--there lies his Grief, poor Heart! Perhaps she has cuckolded him already-- [_Aside_.

--Well, come, Brother--many such things are done--

Sir _Feeb_. Done--hum--come, out with it; Brother--what troubles you to Night?

Sir _Cau_. Troubles me--why, knows he I am robb'd? [_Aside_.

Sir _Feeb_. I may perhaps restore you to the Rest you've lost.

Sir _Cau_. The Rest; why, have I lost more since? Why, know you then who did it?--Oh, how I'd be reveng'd upon the Rascal!

Sir _Feeb_. 'Tis--Jealousy, the old Worm that bites-- [_Aside_.

Who is it you suspect?

Sir _Cau_. Alas, I know not whom to suspect, I wou'd I did; but if you cou'd discover him--I wou'd so swinge him--

Sir _Feeb_. I know him--what, do you take me for a Pimp, Sir? I know him--there's your Watch again, Sir; I'm your Friend, but no Pimp, Sir-- [_Rises in Rage_.

Sir _Cau_. My Watch; I thank you, Sir--but why Pimp, Sir?

Sir _Feeb_. Oh, a very thriving Calling, Sir,--and I have a young Wife to practise with. I know your Rogues.

Sir _Cau_. A young Wife!--'tis so, his Gentlewoman has been at Hot-c.o.c.kles without her Husband, and he's Horn-mad upon't. I suspected her being so close in with his Nephew--in a Fit with a Pox--[_Aside_.]

Come, come, Sir _Feeble_, 'tis many an honest Man's Fortune.

Sir _Feeb_. I grant it, Sir--but to the business, Sir, I came for.

Sir _Cau_. With all my Soul--

[_They sit gaping, and expecting when either should speak.

Enter_ Bredwel _and_ Gayman _at the door_. Bredwel _sees them, and puts_ Gayman_ back again_.

_Bred_. Hah--Sir _Feeble_, and Sir _Cautious_ there--what shall I do?

For this way we must pa.s.s, and to carry him back wou'd discover my Lady to him, betray all, and spoil the Jest--retire, Sir, your Life depends upon your being unseen. [_Go out_.

Sir _Feeb_. Well, Sir, do you not know that I am married, Sir? and this my Wedding Night?

Sir _Cau_. Very good, Sir.

Sir _Feeb_. And that I long to be in bed?

Sir _Cau_. Very well, Sir.

Sir _Feeb_. Very good, Sir, and very well, Sir--why then what the Devil do I make here, Sir? [_Rises in a rage_.