Volume Ii Part 90 (1/2)

Sir _Sig_. Why, 'twill be restor'd again, 'tis but to practise by.

_Pet_. Ay, Signior, the next thing you are to learn is to receive.

_Tick_. Most worthy Signior, I have so exhausted the _Cornucopia_ of your Favours, [_Flourishes_.]--and tasted so plenteously of the fulness of your bounteous Liberality, that to retaliate with this small Gem--is but to offer a Spark, where I have received a Beam of superabundant Suns.h.i.+ne.

[_Gives it_.

Sir _Sig_. Most rhetorically perform'd, as I hope to breathe; Tropes and Figures all over.

_Tick_. Oh Lord, Sir _Signal_.

_Pet_. Excellent--Now let's see if you can refuse as civilly as you gave, which is by an obstinate denial; stand both together--Ill.u.s.trious Signiors, upon my Honour my little Merit has not int.i.tled me to the Glory of so splendid an Offering; Trophies worthy to be laid only at your Magnanimous Feet.

Sir _Sig_. Ah, Signior, no, no.

_Pet_. Signior _Tickletext_.

[_He offers, they refuse going backward_.

_Tick_. Nay, _certo_, Signior.

_Pet_. With what confidence can I receive so rich a Present? Signior _Tickletext_, ah--Signior--

Sir _Sig_. I vow, Signior--I'm ashamed you shou'd offer it.

_Tick_. In verity, so am I. [_Still going back, he follows_.]

_Pet. Pardio! Baccus_, most incomparable.--

_Tick_. But when, Signior, are we to learn to receive again?--

_Pet_. Oh, Sir, that's always a Lesson of it self:--but now, Signiors, I'll teach you how to act a story.

Sir _Sig_. How, how, Signior, to act a story?

_Pet_. Ay, Sir, no matter for words or sense, so the Body perform its part well.

Sir _Sig_. How, tell a story without words! why, this were an excellent device for Mr. _Tickletext_, when he's to hold forth to the Congregation, and has lost his Sermon-Notes--why, this is wonderful.--

_Pet_. Oh, Sir, I have taught it Men born deaf [_Gets between 'em: Makes a sign of being fat; galloping about the Stage_.] and blind:--look ye, stand close together, and observe--closer yet:--a certain Eclejastico, Plump and Rich--Riding along the Road, meets a Paver strapiao,--un Pavaro strapiao, Paure strapiao:--strapiao--strapiao-- strapiao [_Puts himself into the Posture of a lean Beggar; his hands right down by his sides,--and picks both their Pockets_.] Elemosuna per un Paure strapiao, par a Moure de Dievos--at last he begs a Julio--Neinte [_makes the fat Bishop_.] the Paure strapiao begs a Mezo Julio-- [_lean_] Neinte [_fat_]--une bacio--[_lean_]--Neinte-- [_fat_]--at last he begs his Blessing--and see how willingly the Ecclesiastico gave his Benediction. [_Opening his Arms, hits them both in the face_.]--Scusa, scusa mea, Patronas-- [_Begs their pardon_.]

Sir _Sig_. Yes, very willingly, which by the way he had never done had it been worth a farthing.

_Tick_. Marry, I wou'd he had been a little sparing of that too at this time--[_sneezes_] a shame on't, it has stir'd this same _Cackamarda_ again most foully.

_Pet_. Your pardon, Signior;--but come, Sir _Signal_,--let's see how you will make this silent relation--Come, stand between us two--

Sir _Sig_. Nay, let me alone for a memory--come.

_Pet_. I think I have reveng'd my Backsword-beating.