Part 18 (1/2)

Bitter and p.i.s.sed, he glanced past her shoulder to where Venik stared curiously at them. Brax was just one of many reasons why he couldn't let anyone close to him. ”I don't know what I was thinking. It was a stupid dream.”

And he'd been an idiot to believe for one minute that he could ever have a normal life again. She was the prime commander for the Andarion armada. Best friend to the Andarion queen.

He was an Outcast.

Yes, Cairistiona had adopted him, but that wasn't real. She'd only done it to strike at his mother the b.i.t.c.h she hated who had embarra.s.sed Cairistiona when they were young.

I'm done being a p.a.w.n. It was time to remove himself from the game before he brought any more shame to his family. And hurt to himself.

His heart breaking with a reality he could never change, he left and headed back toward his s.h.i.+p.

For a few heartbeats, he thought he was home free. Until he heard Galene approaching him from behind.

She pulled him to a stop. Her hesitant touch and the longing it brought wrung more pain from him than he would have thought bearable. It took everything he had not to crush her against him and run as far away from here with her as he could.

But Ven and the others would find him. They'd drag him back. There was no escape. He'd never been free.

He could never be free.

Galene's breath caught as she saw the utter misery in Fain's eyes. The unguarded pain on his face. ”Chayden and Morra pulled the logs on your s.h.i.+p and doctored them before The Tavali got to them. They told me what you risked for me. And I told Kareem that I a.s.sisted you in the battle and with the flight. I didn't know why he asked until the interview was over and Chayden met me outside to tell me that you weren't supposed to show me what you did. Why would you risk a death sentence?”

”You know why, Stormy.”

”No, I don't.” She scowled up at him. ”You confuse me so much, and...” She cursed as her earpiece went off. Stepping back irritably, she tapped it. ”Commander Batur.”

Fain watched the emotions play across her beautiful face. Galene had never been able to hide her feelings well. It was one of the things he'd loved most about her. He never had to guess. She let everyone know exactly how she felt about everything.

”Is there a problem?”

”Another transmission.” Biting her lip, she hesitated. ”I want to finish this discussion.”

He snorted bitterly. ”I'm not going anywhere.”

To his shock, she took his hand in hers and led it to her soft cheek. Closing her eyes, she nuzzled his fingers and placed a tender kiss to his palm that left him hard and aching. ”What did Venik mean when he said he did things to you that he regretted?”

”He turned me into a cyborg.”

She shook her head. ”No. There was more to it than that.”

Looking away, Fain dropped his hand as old memories surged. ”I don't want to talk about it. It doesn't matter.”

She cupped his cheek and forced him to meet her gaze. ”Yes, it does. You can try to bury it, but it always comes back to hurt you. No one knows that better than I do.”

He winced at her words. ”I never meant to hurt you. I thought you'd forget about me and have a better life. I swear to the G.o.ds, I did.”

”I know that now. And it wasn't that bad. Not really. My fears for Talyn notwithstanding, we had a good life for the most part. The best memories of my life have been because of you, Fain, and the son you gave me. You would have been so proud of him. He has been an honor to us both.”

”Spoken like a true Andarion mother.”

She laughed. ”Come with me. Learn about the son you haven't known. The two of you have been strangers long enough.”

He swallowed hard at the sensation of her hand on his as he felt the old surge of protectiveness. .h.i.t him. The ferocity of it was overwhelming. For a full minute, he couldn't breathe. It was a fire in his blood unlike anything else he'd ever experienced. And only Galene had ever made him feel it.

d.a.m.n. It was why he would always be stupid for her and her alone. She owned him more than Venik ever could.

And she didn't need a kill switch. One frown could gut him. One harsh word was like a knife to his heart.

Hating how much control she had over his life, he followed her back to the command center, where Talyn and Gavarian were again on duty. Only this time, they had Tavali with them, so they were much more guarded with their words.

Talyn pa.s.sed a warning glance to the one Tavali to let them know whom he was most suspicious of before he greeted his mother. ”Commander.” He handed his band over to her. ”The League seems to be in retreat, for now.”

”Thank you, Commander.” She smiled at her son and his military decorum. ”Why don't you and the major take your breaks?”

”Yes, ma'am.” As he started for the door, it slid open to admit a small human male.

Galene was stunned at the boy's presence.

The nine-year-old was bashful and adorable. With brown hair and sad blue eyes, he quickly scanned the group and stepped back at the sight of Gavarian and Talyn, who were giants in comparison to his small size.

Talyn scowled at him, but gentled his tone when he spoke. ”Civilians aren't allowed in here.”

The Tavali closest to the boy laughed. ”It's all right. I'm sure he just wants his dad.”

Fain sucked his breath in sharply as Talyn arched a brow.

”His father?” Talyn asked.

The Tavali pointed to Fain. ”Hauk.”

If expressions were lethal, Fain's guts would be smeared all over the instrument panel behind him. He wasn't sure who hated him most in that moment, Galene, Talyn, or Gavarian.

The only one who didn't hate him was Warwyk as the human boy ran toward him and leaped into his arms for shelter.

Fain cuddled him to his side out of habit. Dreading their a.s.sumptions and anger, he faced the Andarions and cringed. ”I can explain.”

That familiar tic started in Talyn's jaw. ”Forgive me, Commander. I was going to tell you about this later. It seems Hauk has a mistress on the station. I knew she had a boy who lived with her. I a.s.sumed the child had another father. Otherwise, I would have forewarned you.”

Galene's gaze darkened as both Tavali began laughing.

”Shut up,” Fain snapped at them. He let out a tired breath as he faced Galene, Talyn, and Gavarian. ”You three, follow me.”

Galene shook her head. ”I'm not about to meet your mistress, you b.a.s.t.a.r.d!”

Sighing, Fain met War's wide-eyed stare. ”War, tell the lady who you live with.”

”M-m-my sister,” he whispered. ”Why are they so mad at you, Paka?”

Fain s.h.i.+fted the boy to his other hip. ”It's a misunderstanding. Now what has you so upset?”

War's lips quivered as tears welled in his eyes. He fisted his hands in Fain's braids for comfort. ”It's Vega... she done threw me out and locked the door. She said she don't want no man around her ever again and that so long as I have a p.e.n.i.s, I can't come in anymore. I like my p.e.n.i.s, Paka, but I love my sister. Do I really have to choose between them? I mean, I guess I'll choose my sister, but I'd really like to keep them both if I could.”