Part 9 (1/2)
”Of fear?”
”Maybe not,” he said. ”I don't a.n.a.lyze myself the way a human does. My preoccupations are outward.”
”You'reowned ,” I said. ”You belong to Egyptia. You've beenlent to me.”
”So?”
”So, are you angry?”
”Do I look angry?”
”You use the ego-mode: 'I' you say.”
”Yes. Rather ridiculous if I spoke any other way, not to mention confusing.”
”Do I irritate you?”
”No,” he laughed again, very softly. ”Ask whatever you want.”
”Do you like me?” I said.
”I don't know you.”
”But you think, as a robot, you can still get to know me?”
”Better than most of the humans you spend time with, if you'll let me.”
”Do you want to?”
”Of course.”
”Do you want to make love to me?” I cried, my heart a hurt, myself angry and in pain and in sorrow, and in fear-all those things he was spared.
”I want to do whatever you need me to do,” he said.
”Without any feeling.”
”With a feeling of great pleasure, if you're happy.”
”You're beautiful,” I said. ”Do you know you're beautiful?”
”Yes. Obviously.”
”And you draw people like a magnet. You know that, too?”
”You mean metaphorically? Yes, I know.”
”What's it like?” I said. I meant to sound cynical. I sounded like a child asking about the sun. ”What's itlike , Silver?”
”You know,” he said, ”the easiest way to react to me is just to accept me, as I am. You can't become what I am, any more than I can become what you are.”
”You wish you were human.”
”No.”
I went to the window, and looked at the New River, and at the faint sapphire and silver reflection of him on the gla.s.s.
I said to it, forming the words, not even whispering them: I love you. I love you.
Aloud, I said: ”You're much older than me.”
”I doubt it,” he said. ”I'm only three years old.”
I turned and stared at him. It was probably true. He grinned at me.
”All right,” he said. ”I'm supposed to appear between twenty and twenty-three. But counting time from when I was activated, I'm just a kid.”
”This is Clovis's apartment,” I found myself saying then. ”What did you say to him to startle him like that?”
”Like you, he had trouble remembering I'm a robot.”
”Did he... want to make love to you?”
”Yes. He suppressed the idea because it revolted him.”
”Does it revolt you?”
”Here we go again. You asked that already, in another form, and I answered you.”
”You're bi-s.e.xual.”
”I can adapt to whoever I'm with.”
”In order to please them?”
”Yes.”
”It gives you pleasure to please.”
”Yes.”
”You're pre-programmed to be pleased that way.”
”So are humans, actually, to a certain extent.”
I came back into the room.
I said, ”What do you want me to call you?”
”You intend to rename me?”