Volume III Part 19 (1/2)
”You a.s.sure me!--you a.s.sure me! I see you blush through the grating. Am I not your little friend, your neighbor? Why do you conceal anything? Be frank, then, with me; tell me all,” added the grisette, timidly; for she only waited for an avowal from Germain to tell him openly that she loved him. An honest and generous love, which the misfortunes of Germain had called into existence.
”I a.s.sure you,” answered the prisoner, with a sigh, ”that I conceal nothing from you!”
”Fie, the false man!” cried Rigolette, stamping her foot. ”Well, you see this large cravat of white wool that I brought for you?” and she took it from her basket. ”To punish you for your dissimulation, you shall not have it. I knit it for you. I said to myself, it must be so cold, so damp, in those large prison yards, that at least he will be protected nicely with this; he is so chilly.”
”How, you?”
”Yes, you are liable to cold,” said Rigolette, interrupting him. ”Perhaps I recollect it well! that did not, however, prevent you hindering me (out of delicacy) from putting any more wood in my stove when you pa.s.sed the evening with me. Oh, I have a good memory!”
”And I also-only too good!” said Germain, in an agitated voice, pa.s.sing his hand over his eyes.
”Come, now, there you are becoming sad again, although I forbid it.”
”How; do you wish me not to be touched, even to tears, when I think of all that you have done for me since my detention here? And this new attention, is it not charming? Do I not know that you encroach upon your nights to make time to come and see me? On my account you impose upon yourself extra labor.”
”That is it! Pity me then, quickly, because every two or three days I take a fine walk to come and visit my friends, I, who adore a walk. It is so amusing to look at the shops along the streets!”
”And to come out on such a day; such a wind!”
”A reason the more; you have no idea what funny figures you meet! Some holding on their hats with both hands, so that the wind shall not carry them off; others, with their umbrellas turned wrong side out like a tulip, are making incredible grimaces, shutting their eyes, while the rain beats in their faces. Ah! this morning, during my whole walk, it was a real comedy! I promised myself to make you laugh by telling it you. But you will not even force a smile.”
”It is not my fault; pardon me, but the kind interest you have manifested for me touches my very heart. You know it; my emotions are never gay; they are stronger than--”
Rigolette, not wis.h.i.+ng to let him observe that, notwithstanding her prattle, she was very near partaking his agitation, hastened to change the conversation, and replied:
”You say that your feelings are stronger than you; but there is another thing that you will not master, although I have begged and supplicated you,” added Rigolette.
”Of what do you speak?”
”Of your obstinacy in always keeping yourself apart from the other prisoners; in never speaking to them. The warder has just told me again that, for your own interest, you should a.s.sociate with them. I am sure you will not do it. You are silent. You see well it is always the same thing!
You will not be contented until these frightful men have done you some harm!”
”You do not know the horror with which they inspire me. You do not know all the personal reasons that I have to fly and execrate them and their fellows!”
”Alas! yes; I think I know them--these reasons. I have read the papers which you wrote for me, and which I went to your lodgings to get after your imprisonment. There I have learned the dangers you have incurred since your arrival in Paris, because you would not a.s.sociate yourself in crime with the scoundrel who brought you up. It was on account of the trap set for you that you left the Rue du Temple, only telling me where you were going to reside. In those papers I have also read something else,” added Rigolette, blus.h.i.+ng anew, and casting down her eyes; ”I have read some things--that--”
”Oh! that you should have been always ignorant of, I swear it,” cried Germain, quickly, ”but for the misfortune which has fallen upon me--Ah! I interest you; be generous; pardon me these follies; forget them. In happier times I allowed myself these dreams, as wild as they were.”
Rigolette had a second time endeavored to extract an avowal from the lips of Germain, by making allusion to pa.s.sages filled with tenderness and pa.s.sion, which he had formerly written and dedicated to the recollections of the grisette; for, as we have said, he had always felt for her a lively and sincere affection; but to enjoy the cordial intimacy of his sweet neighbor, he had concealed this love under the mask of friends.h.i.+p. Rendered by misfortune still more suspicious and timid, he could not imagine that Rigolette loved him with love: he, a prisoner, he, withering under a terrible accusation, while before these misfortunes she had never evinced any attachment stronger than that of a sister. The grisette, seeing herself so little understood, suppressed a sigh, waiting--hoping for a better occasion to unfold to Germain the wishes of her heart. She answered, then, with embarra.s.sment: ”I can easily comprehend that the society of these bad people causes you horror, but that is no reason for you to brave useless dangers.”
”I a.s.sure you that in order to follow your advice, I have several times tried to address some of them who seemed the least criminal; but if you knew what language! what men!”
”Alas! it is true, it must be terrible.”
”What is still more terrible is, to find I become more and more accustomed, habituated to the frightful conversations which, in spite of myself, I hear all the day; yes, now I listen with a sad apathy to the horrors which, during my first days here, aroused my indignation; thus, I begin to doubt myself,” cried he, with bitterness.
”Oh! M. Germain, what do you say?”
”By constantly living in these horrid places, our minds become accustomed to criminal thoughts, as our hearing becomes habituated to the gross words which resound continually around us. I comprehend now that one can enter here innocent, although accused, and leave it perverted.”