Part 37 (1/2)

RINGDIVVY:

Just so; the steadfast faith of those who hold, In foreign lands beyond the Eastern sea, The shares in your concern--a simple, blind, Unreasoning belief in dividends, Still stimulated by a.s.sessments which, When the skies fall, ensnaring all the larks, Will bring, no doubt, a very great return.

ALL (_singing_):

O the beautiful a.s.sessment, The exquisite a.s.sessment, The regular a.s.sessment, That makes the water flow.

RINGDIVVY:

The rascally-a.s.sessment!

FEEGOBBLE:

The murderous a.s.sessment!

NOZZLE:

The glorious a.s.sessment That makes my mare to go!

FEEGOBBLE:

But, Nozzle, you, I think, were on the point Of making a remark about some rights-- Some certain vested rights you have acquired By long immunity; for still the law Holds that if one do evil undisturbed His right to do so ripens with the years; And one may be a villain long enough To make himself an honest gentleman.

ALL (_singing_):

Hail, holy law, The soul with awe Bows to thy dispensation.

NOZZLE:

It breaks my jaw!

RINGDIVVY:

It qualms my maw!

FEEGOBBLE:

It feeds my jaw, It crams my maw, It is my soul's salvation!

NOZZLE:

Why, yes, I've floated mountains to the sea For lo! these many years; though some, they say, Do strand themselves along the bottom lands And cover up a village here and there, And here and there a ranch. 'Tis said, indeed, The granger with his female and his young Do not infrequently go to the d.i.c.kens By premature burial in slickens.

ALL (_singing_):

Could slickens forever Choke up the river, And slime's endeavor Be tried on grain, How small the measure Of granger's treasure, How keen his pain!

RINGDIVVY:

”A consummation devoutly to be wished!”

These rascal grangers would long since have been Submerged in slimes, to the last man of them, But for the fact that all their wicked tribes Affect our legislation with their bribes.