Part 13 (2/2)

I would say, ”I don't wanna.”

She would say, ”You go.”

I would say, ”I can go in the morning before school.”

She would say, ”You go now. I don't want to hear another word out of you. Here's the money.”

And I would have to go.

Going down was never quite so bad, because most of the time there was still some afterglow in the west, and a kind of pale light lay there, a luminousness, like part of the day lingering there, and all around town you could hear the kids hollering in the last hour they had to play, and you felt somehow not alone, you could go down into that dark place under the trees and you would never think of being lonesome. But when you came back-that was different. When you came back the afterglow was gone; if the stars were out, you could never see them for the trees; and though the streetlights were on-the old fas.h.i.+oned lights arched over the cross-roads-not a ray of them penetrated the lonesome place near the elevator. There it was, half a block long, black as black could be, dark as the deepest night, with the shadows of the trees making it a solid place of darkness, with the faint glow of light where a streetlight pooled at the end of the street, far away it seemed, and that other glow behind, where the other corner light lay.

And when you came that way you walked slower and slower. Behind you lay the brightly-lit stores; all along the way there had been houses, with lights in the windows and music playing and voices of people sitting to talk on their porches-but up there, ahead of you, there was the lonesome place, with no house nearby, and up beyond it the tall, dark grain elevator, gaunt and forbidding, the lonesome place of trees and sheds and lumber, in which anything might be lurking, anything at all, the lonesome place where you were sure that something haunted the darkness waiting for the moment and the hour and the night when you came through to burst forth from its secret place and leap upon you, tearing you and rending you and doing unmentionable things before it had done with you.

That was the lonesome place. By day it was oak and maple trees over a hundred years old, low enough so that you could almost touch the big spreading limbs; it was sheds and lumber piles which were seldom disturbed; it was a sidewalk and long gra.s.s, never mowed or kept down until late fall, when somebody burned it off; it was a shady place in the hot summer days where some cool air always lingered. You were never afraid of it by day, but by night it was a different place; for then it was lonesome, away from sight or sound, a place of darkness and strangeness, a place of terror for little boys haunted by a thousand fears.

And every night, coming home from town, it happened like this. I would walk slower and slower, the closer I got to the lonesome place. I would think of every way around it. I would keep hoping somebody would come along, so that I could walk with him, Mr. Newell, maybe, or old Mrs. Potter, who lived farther up the street, or Reverend Bislor, who lived at the end of the block beyond the grain elevator. But n.o.body ever came. At this hour it was too soon after supper for them to go out, or, already out, too soon for them to return. So I walked slower and slower, until I got to the edge of the lonesome place-and then I ran as fast as I could, sometimes with my eyes closed.

Oh, I knew what was there, all right. I knew there was something in that dark, lonesome place. Perhaps it was the bogey-man. Sometimes my grandmother spoke of him, of how he waited in dark places for bad boys and girls. Perhaps it was an ogre. I knew about ogres in the books of fairy tales. Perhaps it was something else, something worse. I ran. I ran hard. Every blade of gra.s.s, every leaf, every twig that touched me was its its hand reaching for me. The sound of my footsteps slapping the sidewalk were hand reaching for me. The sound of my footsteps slapping the sidewalk were its its steps pursuing. The hard breathing which was my own became steps pursuing. The hard breathing which was my own became its its breathing in its frenetic struggle to reach me, to rend and tear me, to imbue my soul with terror. breathing in its frenetic struggle to reach me, to rend and tear me, to imbue my soul with terror.

I would burst out of that place like a flurry of wind, fly past the gaunt elevator, and not pause until I was safe in the yellow glow of the familiar streetlight. And then, in a few steps, I was home.

And mother would say, ”For the Lord's sake, have you been running on a hot night like this?”

I would say, ”I hurried.”

”You didn't have to hurry that much. I don't need it till breakfast time.”

And I would say, ”I could-a got it in the morning. I could-a run down before breakfast. Next time, that's what I'm gonna do.”

n.o.body would pay any attention.

Some nights Johnny had to go down town, too. Things then weren't the way they are today, when every woman makes a ritual of afternoon shopping and seldom forgets anything; in those days, they didn't go down town so often, and when they did, they had such lists they usually forgot something. And after Johnny and I had been through the lonesome place on the same night, we compared notes next day.

”Did you see anything?” he would ask.

”No, but I heard it,” I would say.

”I felt it,” he would whisper tensely. ”It's got big, flat clawed feet. You know what's the ugliest feet around?”

”Sure, one of those stinking yellow softsh.e.l.l turtles.”

”It's got feet like that. Oh, ugly, and soft, and sharp claws! I saw one out of the corner of my eye,” he would say.

”Did you see its face?” I would ask.

”It ain't got no face. Cross my heart an' hope to die, there ain't no face. That's worse'n if there was one.”

Oh, it was a horrible beast-not an animal, not a man-that lurked in the lonesome place and came forth predatorily at night, waiting there for us to pa.s.s. It grew like this, out of our mutual experiences. We discovered that it had scales, and a great long tail, like a dragon. It breathed from somewhere, hot as fire, but it had no face and no mouth in it, just a horrible opening in its throat. It was as big as an elephant, but it did not look like anything so friendly. It belonged there in the lonesome place; it would never go away; that was its home, and it had to wait for its food to come to it-the unwary boys and girls who had to pa.s.s through the lonesome place at night.

How I tried to keep from going near the lonesome place after dark!

”Why can't Mady go?” I would ask.

”Mady's too little,” mother would answer.

”I'm not so big.”

”Oh, shus.h.!.+ You're a big boy now. You're going to be seven years old. Just think of it.”

”I don't think seven is old,” I would say. I didn't, either. Seven wasn't nearly old enough to stand up against what was in the lonesome place.

”Your Sears-Roebuck pants are long ones,” she would say.

”I don't care about any old Sears-Roebuck pants. I don't wanna go.”

”I want you to go. You never get up early enough in the morning.”

”But I will. I promise I will. I promise, Ma!” I would cry out.

”Tomorrow morning it will be a different story. No, you go.”

That was the way it went every time. I had to go. And Mady was the only one who guessed. ”Fraidycat,” she would whisper. Even she never really knew. She never had to go through the lonesome place after dark. They kept her at home. She never knew how something could lie up in those old trees, lie right along those old limbs across the sidewalk and drop down without a sound, clawing and tearing, something without a face, with ugly clawed feet like a softsh.e.l.l turtle's, with scales and a tail like a dragon, something as big as a house, all black, like the darkness in that place.

But Johnny and I knew.

”It almost got me last night,” he would say, his voice low, looking anxiously out of the woodshed where we sat as if it it might hear us. might hear us.

”Gee, I'm glad it didn't,” I would say. ”What was it like?”

”Big and black. Awful black. I looked around when I was running, and all of a sudden there wasn't any light way back at the other end. Then I knew it was coming. I ran like everything to get out of there. It was almost on me when I got away. Look there!”

And he would show me a rip in his s.h.i.+rt where a claw had come down.

”And you?” he would ask excitedly, big-eyed. ”What about you?”

”It was back behind the lumber piles when I came through,” I said. ”I could just feel it waiting. I was running, but it got right up-you look, there's a pile of lumber tipped over there.”

And we would walk down into the lonesome place in midday and look. Sure enough, there would be a pile of lumber tipped over, and we would look to where something had been lying down, the gra.s.s all pressed down. Sometimes we would find a handkerchief and wonder whether it it had caught somebody; then we would go home and wait to hear if anyone was missing, speculating apprehensively all the way home whether had caught somebody; then we would go home and wait to hear if anyone was missing, speculating apprehensively all the way home whether it it had got Mady or Christine or Helen, or any one of the girls in our cla.s.s or Sunday School, or whether maybe had got Mady or Christine or Helen, or any one of the girls in our cla.s.s or Sunday School, or whether maybe it it had got Miss Doyle, the young primary grades teacher who had to walk that way sometimes after supper. But no one was ever reported missing, and the mystery grew. Maybe had got Miss Doyle, the young primary grades teacher who had to walk that way sometimes after supper. But no one was ever reported missing, and the mystery grew. Maybe it it had got some stranger who happened to be pa.s.sing by and didn't know about the Thing that lived there in the lonesome place. We were sure had got some stranger who happened to be pa.s.sing by and didn't know about the Thing that lived there in the lonesome place. We were sure it it had got somebody. It scared us, bad, and after something like this I hated all the more to go down town after supper, even for candy or ice-cream. had got somebody. It scared us, bad, and after something like this I hated all the more to go down town after supper, even for candy or ice-cream.

”Some night I won't come back, you'll see,” I would say.

”Oh, don't be silly,” my mother would say.

”You'll see. You'll see. It'll get me next, you'll see.”

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