Part 26 (1/2)

Chapter 21.

The Heffers we had obtained were worthy beasts, and we made reasonably good time with them. I was still not pleased over the fact that the weather had not become as temperate as we had hoped, but it wasn't as if I had any choice in dealing with it. Other than the weather, things went fairly smoothly.

We did the best we could in our journey to draw no attention to ourselves, and for the most part we were successful. Entipy cut her hair reasonably short so that, at first glance, she would appear somewhat boyish. We then did all that we could to make certain that no one gave us a second glance. We made eye contact with no one and, when addressed by other travelers, would mutter several indecipherable words to give the impression that we didn't speak any tongue known to civilized man. It was enough to encourage people not to bother with us.

At night we would pick extremely busy inns to stay in. The money that Astel had provided us proved to be more than sufficient to get us quite nice lodgings. Not only that, but it was enough for Entipy and I to have a room each to ourselves, and that much was an extreme relief indeed. You see, I couldn't help but get the feeling that Entipy was becoming more and more attached to me, and that was a circ.u.mstance that simply was not going to benefit anyone.

And yet, much as I am loath to admit it, I found her increasingly easy to talk to. The first thing to make conversation livable was that she had stopped mentioning Tacit with every other breath. At this point she had stopped mentioning him at all. She had totally lost faith in him, and that was not surprising. When one is put on as high a pedestal as Tacit was, one makes a very loud thud when one falls off it. The second thing was that she seemed to want to find out all about me. She found me interesting. I was not, she said, like any other squire or even knight that she had ever encountered before. I'd wager she was right.

For obvious reasons, I wasn't about to tell her chapter and verse about my life. There were certain aspects that were far better kept close to my vest. So the specific circ.u.mstances of my conception, for instance, were omitted. I did tell her of my mother's sense that I had a great destiny, and I further mentioned to her the immortal phoenix bird incident my mother had described so often from her pre-Apropos days. Entipy's eyes widened at that point in the recitation. ”So she saw one even before you were born! That's impressive. You might have even greater auguries for your future than . . .”

She stopped. I knew that she had been about to say ”Tacit,” but she stopped herself before mentioning the name. Instead all she said was ”Go on.”

I described the brutality of her death and the circ.u.mstances which had resulted in my coming to Runcible's castle. One of the things that I discovered Entipy liked to do was speak contemptuously of those who weren't there, and I was able to give her plenty of fodder for it. She was lukewarm on Sir Justus, despised Sir Coreolis (”He's not at all trustworthy,” she said several times), and almost oozed disdain for all of the squires . . . particularly the selfabsorbed Mace Morningstar.

She didn't seem to have much use for her parents, either. She seemed to find the queen tolerable if naught else, but she had no patience for the king at all. ”He's a sham. I know he is,” she said with a snort. She wouldn't go into detail about how she knew this. Apparently she felt that details and facts were unnecessary. If she said it, it had to be so. End of discussion.

Day became night, which became day and on into the night again. On the third day, after she'd found yet another triviality to complain about, I asked her point-blank. I said, ”Is there anyone or anything in this world that doesn't upset you? That brings you pleasure?”

I had a feeling that she was going to bring up Tacit, but instead she surprised me. ”I like sunrises. They make anything seem possible,” she said.

I blinked in surprise. ”I've always felt the same way,” I said.

”Well, of course,” she said matter-of-factly. ”I mean, even you, you, squire, can't be wrong all the time.” It was typical of the snide and arrogant comments she had made to me when we'd first met, but she said it without any heat or vituperation. I caught her eye as I looked at her with open curiosity . . . and she winked at me. squire, can't be wrong all the time.” It was typical of the snide and arrogant comments she had made to me when we'd first met, but she said it without any heat or vituperation. I caught her eye as I looked at her with open curiosity . . . and she winked at me.

That wink said more than anything else thus far, and once again I felt apprehensive.

My ambition was at total war with my common sense. I had, after all, seen the ”real” Entipy: the sullen, arrogant, somewhat dangerous young woman whom we had picked up from the Faith Women. And Mace Morningstar had likewise seen her . . . and almost got his skull cracked for his efforts. Whatever I was seeing now was some new, flirting creature that had been applied to the surface like a cake of mud that some women believed removed wrinkles. She was not remotely genuine. Let us say, as a matter of insane speculation, that we wound up together. Sooner or later the demented Entipy would return, and I would be stuck with the creature for the rest of my life . . . which would probably be foreshortened as a result.

Except . . .

. . . how did I know that? Really? What if . . . what if the Entipy that I had seen before . . . was the ”impostor”? That the one I was seeing now was real? What if she really was as easy to talk to as she now seemed? What if . . .

G.o.ds. What if she really was my ticket to everything?

Just imagine it. Just imagine the faces on the knights, on Morningstar, on all of them, if the king announced that the princess had affianced herself to Apropos. Imagine the sputtered indignation from Justus and Coreolis and the rest. Imagine the look of pure horror from Morningstar and his ilk, knowing that I would eventually be in a position where they would have to bend knee to me, attend my commands, go where I told them they had to go. The joys of honor and obedience: I could instruct Morningstar to strip naked and ride into combat single-handedly against the dreaded Warlord Shank . . .

. . . and he'd have to do it!

”Apropos, why are you smiling in that slightly demented way?” Entipy asked, bringing me back to reality.

A steady chill wind was blowing against our faces, the Heffers treading along the path as best they could against it. We'd been on the road for some days. I glanced at her as she spoke and, pulling my thoughts back to focus, said coolly, ”Just imagining the joy on your parents' faces when I bring you back, Highness.”

”They never liked me, you know,” she said with sullen petulance. ”If they had, they'd never have sent me away.”

”All parents have to do what they think is best for their child.”

”Would you have done it?” There was both curiosity and challenge in her voice.

The easy, facile answer would have been to say no, protesting that she was much too charming to do such a thing. But she'd see right through that, and it had suddenly become of great interest to me to court the princess's genuine affections. Whenever my resolve wavered from that, I'd picture the helpless Morningstar riding into battle and that would help me back onto the correct path.

”You are speaking to one,” I said slowly, ”who never knew the normal trappings of father and mother. My father, as you know, died before I was born” (the story that I had given her to cover the truth of my origins) ”and my mother worked such long and hard hours that she rarely was able to give me any attention. And then she was taken from me. Because of that, I would never want to-in any respect-deprive any child of mine of the immediacy and relations.h.i.+ps that I was never able to have. So, no, I would not send you away. Perhaps that makes me selfish . . .”

”No, no, not at all. It makes you a good father.”

”It reflects my own upbringing, is all. Frequently, Highness, that's all one sees in one's parents: how they themselves were raised. For all you know, your father and mother were likewise sent away, or by other means kept distanced from their parents. For them, what they did was simple normal behavior. On that basis, it would be no more fair to condemn them for their actions than it would to accuse a bear of laziness because it sleeps away the winter. It simply does what comes naturally.”

She nodded thoughtfully, processing the notions. I, in the meantime, continued to let my common sense war with my ambition . . .

”Apropos . . .” and she reached over and took my hand, reining her Heffer to a stop. ”Thank you. Maybe you're right. Maybe . . . you're actually providing a reason for me not to hate my parents. And that's not a bad thing to have at all.”

I squeezed her hand tightly, returning the gesture . . .

. . . and she started to pull me toward her, clearly intending to kiss me.

And as I was faced with this outward, physical display of her affection, an entirely new dynamic entered my mind. I automatically flinched back, and she knew it. I saw the disappointment, the surprise, and even the faintest flutter of anger in her eyes.

The problem was, I knew where it was going to lead. One kiss becomes a second, then a third and so on, and the next thing you know, clothes are everywhere and other parts of you are places they shouldn't be. Places where, I was reasonably sure, Tacit had already been.

That's what it came down to, really. It had taken me a while to realize it, but that was the truth of it. If matters went in that direction, if we became engaged, married, well . . . sooner or later, I'd have to make love to her. And if I made love to her . . . she would compare me to Tacit. It was only inevitable. And there was no question in my mind that, as in all things except the one time I caught him totally by surprise, I would come up short in measuring up . . . so to speak. She would hold me up against his performance, find me lacking, lose all respect for me . . .

None of which I could say to her, of course. But I had to say something, and fast, because I had a hurt and angry princess on my hands, and such a creature is wildly unpredictable. And here, entering a somewhat mountainous and potentially treacherous region of the Outer Lawless realm, I didn't need unpredictability at my side. It could get us both killed.

”Highness . . . as flattered as I am . . . it . . . it wouldn't be right.”

”Why wouldn't it,” she said, sounding quite icy.

”Because,” I said, sounding as reasonable as I could, ”anything you might be feeling for me, Princess . . . might be from the intensity of the moment. Unusual alliances, such as what we have forged, cause all sorts of emotions to become more . . . heightened . . . than they ordinarily would be. They give rise to feelings that would not be there if circ.u.mstances were more normal. For me to take advantage of what you might be feeling for me right now . . . it wouldn't be right. The impulses might not be genuine. Once we are to safety and you can think rationally . . . then we shall see what's what. I wouldn't want to risk taking advantage of you . . .” and then, as a masterstroke of inspiration, I added, ”as others may have, finding you vulnerable and saddened.”

A direct hit. A perfect score. Her eyes widened and she nodded in understanding, and I knew exactly what was going through her mind because I, Apropos, master of subtlety, had planted it there. She was starting to wonder whether her involvement with Tacit had truly been the grand romantic adventure she had thought it was . . . or whether he was simply taking advantage of her. And if he was . . . while here, Apropos was refusing to do so . . . how n.o.ble did that make Apropos, and how much of a cad did that make Tacit? Apropos, who had been here and come through for her, and Tacit who hadn't? My mind soared with joy.

And that was when it hit me.

It wasn't anything bad, actually; in fact, it was very surprising. It was a gust of warm air, so unexpected and so out of place that its sudden appearance struck me almost like the blow of a hammer.

What was even the more surprising was that the general area we were in was somewhat colder than before, probably because the road was going on a steady upward slope, which meant we were going higher, where alt.i.tude was less and the air was chillier. In the near distance I could see mountain peaks, thick with snow. So a sudden gust of warm air truly seemed to come from nowhere.

I pulled out the map that Dotty had provided us. The fortress at Terracote truly didn't seem all that far . . . another few days at most. However, it was going to become more difficult before it became easier, because I saw more mountains dotting the path. They seem to be fairly low by comparison to others on the same map, but it still was going to be an effort. So I certainly didn't want us to become distracted by things that were off the path.

Yet that was what was happening, because Entipy felt the same gusting warmth that I did. ”Is it from a spring, do you think?” she asked. ”Or some sort of sulfur caves?”

”For all I know they left the door to h.e.l.l ajar. Whatever it is, it's none of our concern.” Even as I spoke, though, I felt another wafting of warm air and, more, the whiff of lilacs. I hadn't a clue to what was going on.

The Heffers, though, did not seem pleased. They whinnied uncertainly, and mine started to back up slightly.

Entipy, however, would have none of it. ”I want to see what's causing that. If it's a warmer path than through the mountains, we should take it.”

I looked at the wall of trees which was lining the edge of the road. There were no leaves upon them, but instead thick green needles . . . not sharp, but enough so that we couldn't have a clear vision of what lay past them. ”There's no path here to take,” I said in what I hoped was my most reasonable manner.