Part 21 (1/2)
”d.i.c.k, are you mad?” she challenged, trying to summon her a.s.surance through the fright which he had given her. ”It's not what you think....
It's none of your affair--
”d.i.c.k!”
He grasped her wrists roughly.
”Am I mad?” he repeated, looking down at her, his jaw clenched. ”Yes, I'm mad. Mad from want of you ... your eyes, your lips, your hair, your very breath drives me mad and when I hear you tell me that you've found the flesh that calls to your flesh among these men it drives me wild! I can offer you more than any of them can a thousand times over....
”Great G.o.d, I love you!”
But his snarl was not the snarl of devotion, of affection. It was the l.u.s.t cry of the destroyer, he who would possess hungrily, unthinkingly, without sympathy or understanding ... even without respect.
He drew her to him roughly and she struggled, too frightened to cry out, face white and lips closed. He imprisoned both her hands in his one and with the other arm about her body crushed it against his, her breast to his breast, her limbs to his limbs. He lowered his lips toward her face and she bent backward, crying out lowly, but the touch of her lithe torso, tense in the struggle to be free, made his strength greater, swept away the last barrier of caution and his body was aflame with desire.
”d.i.c.k ... stop....” she panted and managed to free one hand.
She struck him on the mouth and struck again, blindly. He gave her efforts no notice but, releasing her hands, crushed her to him with both arms and she could feel the quick come and go of his breath through her hair as he buried his face in it.
And at that she became possessed of fresh strength. She turned and half slipped, half fought her way through his clutch, running down the room to the fireplace where she stood with the davenport between them breathing irregularly, a hand clenched at her breast.
”You ... you beast!” she said, slowly, unsteadily as he came toward her again.
”Yes, beast!” he echoed. ”We're all beasts, every one of us who sees and feels and I've seen you and I've felt you and the beast is hungry!”
”And you call that love!” She spoke rapidly, breathlessly. ”An hour ago if anyone would have said that d.i.c.k Hilton, sober, would have displayed this, this _thing_ which is his true self, I'd have come to your defense! But now ... you ... you!”
Her face was flaming, her voice shook with outraged pride.
”Stop!” she cried, drawing herself up, no longer afraid. She emerged from fear commanding, impressive, and Hilton hesitated, putting one hand to a chair back and eyeing her calculatingly as though scheming.
The vein on his forehead still stood out like an uneven seam.
”For shame!” she cried again. ”Shame on you, d.i.c.k Hilton, and shame on me for having tolerated, for having believed in you ... little as I did! Oh, I loathe it all, you and myself--that was--because if it had not been for that other self which tolerated you, which gave you the opening, this ... this insult would never have been. You, who failing to buy a woman's love, would take it by strength! You would do this, and talk of your desire as love. You, who scoff at men whose respect for women is as real as the lives they lead. You ... you beast!”
She hissed the word.
”Yes, beast!” he repeated again. ”Like all these other beasts, these others who are blinding you as you say I have blinded you, who have--”
”Stop it!” she demanded again. ”There is nothing more to be said ...
ever. We understand one another now and there is but one thing left for you to do.”
”And that?”
”Go.”
He laughed bitterly and ran a hand over his sleek hair.
”If I go, you go with me,” he said evenly.
”Leave this house,” the girl commanded, but instead of obeying he moved toward her again menacingly, a disgusting smile on his lips.