Part 34 (2/2)

We left orbit three hours later, pus.h.i.+ng outward on low drive to conserve fuel.

That plus the course I'd chosen meant another ten hours until we were in position for the first point, but none of that time was wasted. Pascal and Chileogu were able to program and run two more approximation schemes; the results, unfortunately, were not encouraging. Any two of the three plots had a fair chance of agreeing over ranges of half a degree or so, but there was no consistency at all over the larger angles we would need to use. Chileogu refused to throw in the towel, pointing out that he had another six methods to try and making vague noises about statistical curve-fitting schemes. I promised him all the computer time he needed between point maneuvers, but privately I conceded defeat. Lanton's method now seemed our only chance... if it worked.

I handled the first point myself, double-checking all parameters beforehand and taking special pains to run the gyro needle as close to the proper angle as I could. As with any such hand operation, of course, perfection was not quite possible, and I ran the Dancer something under a hundredth of a degree long. I'm not sure what I was expecting from this first test, but I was more than a little surprised when Lanton accurately reported that we'd slightly overshot the mark.

”It looks like it'll work,” Alana commented from her cabin when I relayed the news. She didn't sound too enthusiastic.

”Maybe,” I said, feeling somehow the need to be as skeptical as possible.

”We'll see what happens when he starts taking Bradley off the drugs. I find it hard to believe that the man's mental state can be played like a yo-yo, and if it can't be we'll have to go with whatever statistical magic Chileogu can put together.”

Alana gave a little snort that she'd probably meant to be a laugh. ”Hard to know which way to hope, isn't it?”

”Yeah.” I hesitated for a second, running the duty arrangements over in my mind. ”Look, why don't you take the next few days off, at least until the next point.

Sarojis can take your s.h.i.+ft up here.”

”That's all right,” she sighed. ”I-if it's all the same with you, I'd rather save any offtime until later. Rik will... need my help more then.”

”Okay,” I told her. ”Just let me know when you want it and the time's yours.”

We continued on our slow way, and with each cascade point I became more and more convinced that Lanton really would be able to guide us through those last two critical points. His accuracy for the first four maneuvers was a solid hundred percent, and on the fifth maneuver we got to within point zero two percent of the computer's previous reading by deliberately jockeying the Dancer back and forth until Bradley's image pattern was exactly as Lanton remembered it. After that even Matope was willing to be cautiously optimistic; and if it hadn't been for one small cloud hanging over my head I probably would have been as happy as the rest of the pa.s.sengers had become.

The cloud, of course, being Bradley.

I'd been wrong about how much his improvement had been due to the drugs Lanton had been giving him, and every time I saw him that ill-considered line about playing his mind like a yo-yo came back to haunt me. Slowly, but very steadily, Bradley was regressing toward his original mental state. His face went first, his expressions beginning to crowd each other again as if he were unable to decide which of several moods should be expressed at any given moment. His eyes took on that s.h.i.+ning, nervous look I hated so much: just occasionally at first, but gradually becoming more and more frequent, until it seemed to be almost his norm. And yet, even though he certainly saw what was happening to him, not once did I hear him say anything that could be taken as resentment or complaint. It was as if the chance to save twenty other lives was so important to him that it was worth any sacrifice. I thought occasionally about Alana's comment that he'd never before had a sense of dignity, and wondered if he would lose it again to his illness.

But I didn't wonder about it all that much; I was too busy worrying about Alana.

I hadn't expected her to take Bradley's regression well, of course-to someone with Alana's wing-mending instincts a backsliding patient would be both insult and injury. What I wasn't prepared for was her abrupt withdrawal into a sh.e.l.l of silence on the issue which no amount of gentle probing could crack open. I tried to be patient with her, figuring that eventually the need to talk would overcome her reticence; but as the day for what Lanton described as ”minor surgery” approached, I finally decided I couldn't wait any longer. On the day after our sixth cascade point, I quit being subtle and forced the issue.

”Whatever I'm feeling, it isn't any concern of yours,” she said, her fingers playing across the bridge controls as she prepared to take over from me. Her hands belied the calmness in her voice: I knew her usual checkout routine as well as my own, and she lost the sequence no fewer than three times while I watched.

”I think it is,” I told her. ”Aside from questions of friends.h.i.+p, you're a member of my crew, and anything that might interfere with your efficiency is my concern.”

She snorted. ”I've been under worse strains than this without falling apart.”

”I know. But you've never buried yourself this deeply before, and it worries me.”

”I know. I'm... sorry. If I could put it into words-” She shrugged helplessly.

”Are you worried about Bradley?” I prompted. ”Don't forget that, whatever Lanton has to do here, he'll have all the resources of the Swedish Psychiatric Inst.i.tute available to undo it.”

”I know. But... he's going to come out of it a different person. Even Lanton has to admit that.”

”Well... maybe it'll wind up being a change for the better.”

It was a stupid remark, and her scornful look didn't make me feel any better about having made it. ”Oh, come on. Have you ever heard of an injury that did any real good? Because that's what it's going to be-an injury.”

And suddenly I understood. ”You're afraid you won't like him afterwards, aren't you? At least not the way you do now?”

”Why should that be so unreasonable?” she snapped. ”I'm a d.a.m.n fussy person, you know-I don't like an awful lot of people. I can't afford to... to lose any of them.” She turned her back on me abruptly, and I saw her shoulders shake once.

I waited a decent interval before speaking. ”Look, Alana, you're not in any shape to stay up here alone. Why don't you go down to your cabin and pull yourself together, and then go and spend some time with Bradley.”

”I'm all right,” she mumbled. ”I can take my s.h.i.+ft.”

”I know. But... at the moment I imagine Rik needs you more than I do. Go on, get below.”

She resisted for a few more minutes, but eventually I bent her sense of duty far enough and she left. For a long time afterwards I just sat and stared at the stars, my thoughts whistling around my head in tight orbit. What would the effect of the new Bradley be on Alana? She'd been right-whatever happened, it wasn't likely to be an improvement. If her interest was really only in wing-mending, Lanton's work would provide her with a brand-new challenge. But I didn't think even Alana was able to fool herself like that anymore. She cared about him, for sure, and if he changed too much that feeling might well die.

And I wouldn't lose her when we landed.

I thought about it long and hard, examining it and the rest of our situation from several angles. Finally, I leaned forward and keyed the intercom. Wilkinson was off duty in his cabin; from the time it took him to answer he must have been asleep as well. ”Wilkinson, you got a good look at the damage in Lanton's neural whatsis machine. How hard would it be to fix?”

”Uh... well, that's hard to say. The thing that spit goop all over the Ming-metal coil was a standard voltage regulator board-we're bound to have spares aboard.

But there may be other damage, too. I'd have to run an a.n.a.lyzer over it to find out if anything else is dead. Whether we would have replacements is another question.”

”Okay. Starting right now, you're relieved of all other duty until you've got that thing running again. Use anything you need from s.h.i.+p's spares-” I hesitated-”and you can even pirate from our cargo if necessary.”

”Yes, sir.” He was wide awake now. ”I gather there's a deadline?”

”Lanton's going to be doing some ultrasound work on Bradley in fifty-eight hours. You need to be done before that. Oh, and you'll need to work in Lanton's cabin-I don't want the machine moved at all.”

”Got it. If you'll clear it with Lanton, I can be up there in twenty minutes.”

Lanton wasn't all that enthusiastic about letting Wilkinson set up shop in his cabin, especially when I wouldn't explain my reasons to him, but eventually he gave in. I alerted Kate Epstein that she would have to do without Wilkinson for a while, and then called Matope to confirm the projects access to took and spares.

And then, for the time being, it was all over but the waiting. I resumed my examination of the viewport, wondering if I were being smart or just pipe- dreaming.

Two days later-barely eight hours before Bradley's operation was due to begin-Wilkinson finally reported that the neural tracer was once again operational.

”This better be important,” Lanton fumed as he took his place at the dining- room table. ”I'm already behind schedule in my equipment setup as it is.”

I glanced around at the others before replying. Pascal and Chileogu, fresh from their latest attempt at making sense from their a.s.sortment of plots, seemed tired and irritated by this interruption. Bradley and Alana, holding hands tightly under the table, looked more resigned than anything else. Everyone seemed a little gaunt, but that was probably my imagination-certainly we weren't on anything approaching starvation rations yet. ”Actually, Doctor,” I said, looking back at Lanton, ”you're not in nearly the hurry you think. There's not going to be any operation.”

That got everyone's full attention. ”You've found another way?” Alana breathed, a hint of life touching her eyes for the first time in days.

”I think so. Dr. Chileogu, I need to know first whether a current running through Ming metal would change its effect on the s.h.i.+p's real rotation.”

He frowned, then shrugged. ”Probably. I have no idea how, though.”

A good thing I'd had the gadget fixed, then. ”Doesn't matter. Dr. Lanton, can you tell me approximately when in the cascade point your neural tracer burned out?”

”I can tell you exactly. It was just as the images started disappearing, right at the end.”

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