Part 24 (1/2)

Leonora sat silent for a moment, as if waiting to see the effect of that last word; unless, indeed, she were hesitating, out of delicacy, to include her lover's family in her complaint. The young man shrank with a terrible presentiment. Dona Bernarda was not the woman to stand by idle and resigned in the face of opposition, even from him!

”I see ... mother!” he said in a stifled voice. ”She has been up to something. Tell me what it is. Don't be afraid. To me you are dearer than anything else in the world.”

”Well ... there is auntie ...” Leonora resumed; and Rafael remembered that dona Pepa, remarking his a.s.siduous visits to the Blue House, had thought her niece might be contemplating marriage. In the afternoon, Leonora explained, she had had a _scene_ with her aunt. Dona Pepa had gone into town to confession, and on coming out of church had met dona Bernarda. Poor old woman! Her abject terror on returning home betrayed the intense emotion Rafael's mother had succeeded in wakening in her.

Leonora, her niece, her idol, lay in the dust, stripped of that blind, enthusiastic, affectionate trust her aunt had always had for her. All the gossip, all the echoes of Leonora's adventurous life, that had--heretofore but feebly--come to her ears, the old lady had never believed, regarding them as the work of envy. But now they had been repeated to her by dona Bernarda, by a lady ”in good standing,” a good Christian, a person incapable of falsehood. And then after rehearsing that scandalous biography, Rafael's mother had come to the shocking effrontery with which her niece and Rafael were rousing the whole city; flaunting their wrong-doing in the face of the public; and turning her home, the respectable, irreproachable home of dona Pepa, into a den of vice, a brothel!

And the poor woman had wept like a child in her niece's presence, adjuring her to ”abandon the wicked path of transgression,” shuddering with horror at the great responsibility she, dona Pepa, had unwittingly a.s.sumed before G.o.d. All her life she had labored and prayed and fasted to keep her soul clean. She had thought herself almost in a state of grace, only to awaken suddenly and find herself in the very midst of sin through no fault of her own--all on account of her niece, who had converted her holy, her pure, her pious home into an ante-chamber of h.e.l.l! And it was the poor woman's superst.i.tious terror, the conviction of d.a.m.nation that had seized on dona Pepa's simple soul, that wounded Leonora most deeply.

”They've robbed me of all I had in the world,” she murmured desperately, ”of the affection of the only dear one left after my father died. I am not the child of former days to auntie; that is apparent from the way she looks at me, the way she shuns me, avoiding all contact with me....

And just because of you, because I love you, because I was not cruel to you! Oh, that night! How I shall suffer for it!... How clearly I foresaw how it would all end!”

Rafael was humiliated, crushed, filled with shame and remorse at the suffering that had fallen upon this woman, because she had given herself to him. What was he to do? The time had come to prove himself the strong, the resourceful man, able to protect the beloved woman in her moment of danger. But where should he strike first to defend her?...

Leonora lifted her head from her lover's shoulder, and withdrew from his embrace. She wiped away her tears and rose to her feet with the determination of irrevocable resolution.

”I have made up my mind. It hurts me very much to say what I am going to say; but I can't help it. It will do you no good to say 'no'--I cannot stay under this roof another day. Everything is over between my aunt and me. Poor old woman! The dream I cherished was to care for her lovingly, tenderly till she died in my arms, be to her what I failed to be to father.... But they have opened her eyes. To her I am nothing but a sinner now and my presence upsets everything for her.... I must go away.

I've already told Beppa to pack my things.... Rafael, my love, this is our last night together.... To-morrow ... and you will never see me again.”

The youth recoiled as if someone had struck him in the breast.

”Going? Going ...? And you can say that coolly, simply, just like that?

You are leaving me ... this way ... just when we are happiest ...?”

But soon he had himself in hand again. This surely could be nothing more than a pa.s.sing impulse, a notion arrived at in a flash of anger. Of course she did not really mean to go! She must think things over, see things clearly. That was a crazy idea! Desert her Rafaelito? Absurd!

Impossible!

Leonora smiled sadly. She had expected him to talk that way. She, too, had suffered much, ever so much, before deciding to do it! It made her shudder to think that within two days she would be off again, alone, wandering through Europe, caught up again in that wild, tumultuous life of art and love, after tasting the full sweetness of the most powerful pa.s.sion she had ever known--of what she believed was her ”first love.”

It was like putting to sea in a tempest with destination unknown. She loved him, adored him, wors.h.i.+pped him, more than ever now that she was about to lose him.

”Well, why are you going?” the young man asked. ”If you love me, why are you forsaking me?”

”Just because I love you, Rafael.... Because I want you to be happy.”

For her to remain would mean ruin for him: a long battle with his mother, who was an implacable, a merciless foe. Dona Bernarda might be killed, but never conquered! Oh, no! How horrible! Leonora knew what filial cruelty was! How had she treated her father? She must not now come between a son and a mother! Was she, perhaps, a creature accursed, born forever to corrupt with her very name the sacredest, purest relations on earth?

”No, you must be good, my heart. I must go away. We can't go on loving each other here. I'll write to you, I'll let you know all I'm doing....

You'll hear from me every day, if I have to write from the North Pole!

But you must stay! Don't drive your mother to despair! Shut your eyes to the poor woman's injustice! For after all, she is doing it all out of her immense love for you.... Do you imagine I am glad to be leaving you--the greatest happiness I have ever known?”

And she threw her arms about Rafael, kissing him over and over again, caressing his bowed, pensive head, within which a tempest of conflicting ideas and resolutions was boiling.

So those bonds which he had come to believe eternal were to be broken?

So he was to lose so easily that beauty which the world had admired, the possession of which had made him feel himself the first among men? She talked of a love from a distance, of a love persisting through years of separation, travel, all the hazards of a wandering life; she promised to write to him every day!... Write to him ... from the arms of another man, perhaps! No! He would never give up such a treasure; never!

”You shall not go,” he answered at last decisively. ”A love like ours is not ended so easily. Your flight would be a disgrace to me--it would look as if I had affronted you in some way, as if you were tired of me.”

Deep in his soul he felt eager to make some chivalrous gesture. She was going away because she had loved him! He should stay behind, sad and resigned like a maid abandoned by a lover, and with the sense of having harmed her on his conscience! _Ira de dios_! He, as a man, could not stand by with folded arms accepting the abnegation of a woman, to stick tied to his mother's ap.r.o.n-strings in b.o.o.bified contentment. Even girls ran away from home and parents sometimes, in the grip of a powerful love; and he, a man, a man ”in the public eye” also--was he to let a beautiful girl like Leonora go away sorrowful and in tears, so that he could keep the respect of a city that bored him and the affection of a mother who had never really loved him? Besides, what sort of a love was it that stepped aside in a cowardly, listless way like that, when a woman was at stake, a woman for whom far richer, far more powerful men than he, men bound to life by attractions that he had never dreamed of in his countrified existence, had died or gone to ruin?...