Part 8 (1/2)

Your dearest friend, Mary Mr Darcy to Colonel Fitzwilliam Netherfield Park, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 19 Dear Henry, Wickham is here! In Hertfords.h.i.+re-indeed, in Meryton! I saw him not an hour ago. It was an unpleasant shock, and I cannot help wondering what mischief he is planning. He has never forgiven me for denying him the living, though he knows he should never have had it, and he has hated me even more since I frustrated his attempts to elope with Georgiana. After that, I was sure I would never see him again, and yet here he is, in my very neighbourhood. I cannot think it is an accident, it must be by design, yet he seemed as shocked as I was at our meeting. What can it mean?

It happened like this. Bingley and I were riding over to Longbourn to see how Miss Bennet did, when we saw the Miss Bennets walking to their aunt's house with a small party. They were all talking together with perfect ease until we came upon them, when they stopped to talk to us. Bingley enquired after Miss Bennet's health and I was in the act of turning away from her sister when I saw Wickham. He saw me at the same moment and went red, and then touched his hat with the coolest impudence I have ever seen. Does he mean to torment me with his presence? Is that his idea in coming here? Is it his revenge, to force himself into my company, knowing that if he is with the officers there is nothing I can do about it?

I cannot say. And yet I wish I knew.

Our meeting lasted only moments but it has left me feeling unsettled and I find myself worrying about Georgiana. Perhaps Wickham is hoping she will join me here, and perhaps he thought to make himself agreeable to her again, and relied on being able to escape my notice. Or perhaps he wanted to a.s.sure himself that I was really settled in the country, so that he could arrange a meeting with her in London whilst I was away.

I am perhaps being overly cautious, but I am writing to Philip, as he is presently in London, and I have asked him to visit Georgiana. He does not know what happened at Ramsgate and I have no intention of telling him; it is not at all necessary, as he will think my concern is nothing more than brotherly interest. If anything is amiss, I am sure he will tell me.

I will write to you again tomorrow. We are dining with the officers tonight and I hope to learn more from them. I only hope that Wickham is not with them.

I dare say this all seems very trivial to you, caught up as you are in the war. Tell me everything you can, without compromising your troops; I rely on you for news. The papers are full of such conflicting reports it is impossible to know what is really going on. Half of them are motivated by patriotic fervour and promise us that victory is imminent, and the other half are motivated by a desire to ridicule the government and its handling of the war and write daily of the certainty of our being invaded before the year is out.

Your cousin, Darcy Mr Darcy to Mr Philip Darcy Netherfield Park, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 19 Mr dear Philip, I know you are in town and I would be much obliged if you would call on Georgiana and let me know how she goes on. I had to dismiss her last companion, as you know, because the woman did not know what company was suitable for Miss Darcy, and although I have every confidence in Mrs Annesley, I think it does no harm to keep a brotherly eye on things.

Your cousin, Darcy Mr Wickham to Mrs Younge Meryton, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 20 Belle! I miss you! The women of Hertfords.h.i.+re are nothing to you. I have met them all, and not one of them can hold a candle to you. I wish I was in town with you, but London is too hot to hold me, and many other towns as well. I had an uncomfortable feeling yesterday that Meryton was going to be too hot for me as well, not because I have run up a mountain of debts already, but because Darcy is here! Can you believe it? Was there ever a man plagued by such d--d bad luck as I am? I saw him whilst out walking with one of the officers here. We had just fallen into conversation with a family of young ladies-not a patch on you, Belle, none of them-when who should ride up but Darcy. He was with his friend Bingley, and the two of them were evidently acquainted with the ladies, for they stopped to talk to them. I thought Darcy was going to have an apoplexy! I was none too comfortable myself. I knew he could make things very difficult for me if he chose, and though in order to destroy me he will have to destroy his sister, I am not certain he will not do it. He hates me enough, I am sure. He went white when he saw me and his hands clutched the reins of his horse so tightly I thought he would tear them in two. I went red. How could I help it? But I quickly recovered myself and touched my hat. He was incensed. He did not want to acknowledge me. But rather than make a scene, he saluted me in return. Our greeting would have pa.s.sed unnoticed, but for the glance of Miss Elizabeth Bennet, which happened to notice all. I saw her surprise, and on learning that her sister is shortly to become betrothed to Darcy's friend-for her aunt told me so-I was afraid that Miss Elizabeth might have the whole story out of her future brother-in-law. I could do nothing about it at the time, but being invited to a party at her aunt's house, I sought her out and sat next to her, hoping to discover what she knew. And then at last I had a stroke of good luck, for a change, as I quickly discovered that she did not like Darcy. Moreover, half the town did not like him, for his superior airs had given them a disgust of him. Thank G.o.d for Darcy's d--d sn.o.bbishness. It has served me well. I was able to give Miss Elizabeth an account of my dealings with Darcy which, you may be sure, were favourable to me: how his revered father left me a living, which Darcy chose not to give me; how he was jealous of me, because of his father's love for me; how I was not meant for a military life, but meant to make the best of it. I tempered it with remarks on his liberality to his tenants and his affection for his sister, but I took care to portray Georgiana as proud, so that if word ever reaches Miss Elizabeth about that unfortunate affair, she will put it down to malicious gossip.

I had an uncomfortable moment when she said that he deserved to be publicly disgraced, for if my lies came out, then Darcy would not hesitate to refute them, but I recovered quickly and said that I should never breathe a word of it, out of respect for his father.

Although quick-witted enough in other respects, Miss Elizabeth believed me, without it ever occurring to her that I had just breathed a word of it, indeed many words of it, to her. I wonder what he has done to her, to give her such an immoveable dislike of him? Insulted her, no doubt. Not deliberately, but in that superior way he has of making everyone else feel that they are beneath his notice.

So now I am firmly established in her good opinion, and in the good opinion of the rest of the town. A handsome face and a charming manner will always win friends for the man who puts himself out to win them. A bit of flattery thrown into the mix and it is soon done. Whether or not I will stay here I do not know. Much depends on Darcy. I do not know at present how long he intends to stay here. If it is only for a few weeks, then it will be worth my while to stay, but if he intends to stay here for months, then things might become uncomfortable. I am still undecided. But I must live somewhere, and until anything better offers, in Meryton I must stay.

George Mrs Younge to Mr Wickham London, November 21 Ah, Georgy, you don't fool me, it's your Belle you're talking to. You've been charming the young ladies of Meryton and you've singled out Miss Elizabeth as your flirt. She must be pretty, then, and lively, and witty, for you wouldn't waste your time on her otherwise. You'll leave a mountain of debts and a string of broken hearts behind you when you leave the neighbourhood, I dare say.

Fancy you seeing Darcy there, of all places. That was a piece of bad luck, but I don't suppose he will be there for long; he will be wanting to see his sister again soon and he will be riding back to town.

Hurry up and find an heiress. We've had a lot of good times, you and me, and will have some more before we're done, but we need money to do it with.

Belle Mr Darcy to Colonel Fitzwilliam Netherfield Park, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 22 My dear Henry, You will be relieved to hear that Philip has been to see Georgiana and that he has found nothing to alarm him. I mentioned that Georgiana's last companion allowed her to mix with unsuitable people and, being a brother himself, he understood my concern and made minute enquiries. He found out what letters were received and sent from the house and they were all unexceptionable. He spoke at length with Mrs Annesley and found her to be as reliable and trustworthy as I had found her, and he spoke to Georgiana and found her happy and intent on painting Ullswater. He then spoke to the groom and discovered that Georgiana never spoke to anyone in the park who could be considered undesirable and that she was attended at all times.

So my worst fears were ungrounded.

Indeed, it seems now certain that Wickham's presence in the neighbourhood is pure chance. I dined with the officers again and discovered that Wickham came here at the invitation of Mr Denny. The two were already acquainted and Denny persuaded Wickham that a life in the militia would suit him. Wickham, as always, has pockets to let, and so he is to purchase a lieutenant's commission. Where he will find the money I do not know, nor do I care, as long as he does not ask me for it, and after our unfriendly greeting I have no fear of it.

If not for the fact that I will have to accustom myself to seeing him from time to time, I would not think of him again. Unfortunately, Bingley has invited him to a ball at Netherfield-not him especially, but as one of the officers. I could not very well ask Bingley to make an exception of Wickham, at least not without arousing curiosity, and so I said nothing. Caroline, though, suspects something, but I believe she has put my aversion down to pride, and thinks that I do not wish to mix with the son of my father's steward. It is better than her discovering my real reason for hating him-and hate him I still do. My good opinion, once lost, is lost forever.

Your cousin, Darcy Miss Charlotte Lucas to Miss Susan Sotherton Lucas Lodge, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 22 Dearest Susan, We have two new additions to Meryton society. The Bennets have a cousin staying with them, a Mr Collins, and there is a new officer-or soon-to-be officer-Mr Wickham. My brothers and sisters are all hoping that one or other of the gentlemen will make me an offer, but I think it unlikely. It is a pity, for I would certainly accept. My feelings on this matter have brought home to me what a very great difference there is between twenty-seven and one and twenty. Jane is the object of Mr Bingley's attentions, but she does nothing to encourage him. Such reticence is very sweet at her age, but if she does not have a care, she might find herself having to encourage someone far less agreeable in another five years' time.

Elizabeth is meanwhile the object of her cousin's attentions. I think she has only just begun to suspect it and is mortified. To be sure, he is not a sensible man, and has nothing in the way of personal virtues to recommend him, but he has a good living, a comfortable establishment and the patronage of Lady Catherine de Bourgh. His wife will be respectable and respected, and I must confess that if such a man were to appear interested in me, I would encourage him in every way available to me. But Elizabeth is yet young enough and romantic enough to think that true love still awaits her. As for myself, I have never been romantic. I have no belief in love, true or otherwise, but I would be glad of my own home and my own life, away from my family, no matter how much I love them.

I am invited to a ball at Netherfield and there I will no doubt dance with all the officers, make myself agreeable, and hope that one of them will be as unromantic as I am and decide that he needs a sensible wife.

But what of you? Are you still liking Bath? Is your father any better? Is your mother any happier? Have you any prospects?

Write to me soon, Charlotte Mr Wickham to Mrs Younge Meryton, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 22 Ah, Belle, how strange a thing is life, one minute up, one minute down, and then up again! After my recent holiday in debtors' prison it was balm to my spirit to find myself invited to a ball at Netherfield Park. That is an arena in which I can s.h.i.+ne. I am not asked there for my own sake, but that is not important; I have an invitation and that is all that counts. As Mr Bingley did not make an exception of me when he invited all the officers, he evidently does not know what happened in Ramsgate last summer. Darcy must have been too proud to tell him, for which I am grateful. Bingley will be useful to me as long as he stays in ignorance. He can give me an entree into the best society here and, better yet, he has a wealthy sister. The gossip is that Caroline Bingley has her sights set on Darcy, but I know him too well to think that he will ever marry her, for she has no pedigree and her money comes from trade. Sooner or later she will realise that she is wasting her time and then she will be vulnerable to a handsome charmer and there might be a chance for me.

In the meantime, I am keeping my wits about me. There are bound to be some wealthy young women in the neighbourhood and they are bound to be at the Netherfield ball. I am looking forward to seeing the look on Darcy's face when I walk in! No matter what his true feelings, he will have to be polite to me, as a guest of his friend. I am looking forward to it.

George Mrs Younge to Mr Wickham London, November 23 I think you would do better to avoid the ball; it might provoke Darcy into revealing something you would rather have concealed. The people of Meryton believe you to be a good, honest citizen at the moment. They give you ready credit and you have friends who will be useful to you, but all that will change if Darcy lets slip something about your habit of running up debts, let alone your habit of trying to run off with rich young girls.

Your own, Belle Mr Wickham to Mrs Younge Meryton, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 25 Perhaps you are right. I will say that I have business in town. It is as good an excuse as any. Expect me tomorrow at midday.

George Miss Lydia Bennet to Miss Eleanor Sotherton Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 26 You will never guess what we have been doing all week: getting ready for the Netherfield ball. Lizzy has been telling Mama that my dress is too low and Mama has been busy telling her that it is not! Mama says that Mr Bingley's giving a ball is a compliment to Jane but I think it is a compliment to me since I am the one who asked him for it, and you may be sure I intend to tease everyone else in the neighbourhood into giving a ball as well, just as soon as this one is over.

Kitty and me have been wanting to walk into Meryton a dozen times since Miss Bingley brought us the invitation but it has been raining so hard we have not been able to go once. It is wet enough for a river in the lane. Mary says that it is a punishment on us for being so frivolous and she has been writing about it in her book. La! You never saw such nonsense.

If we all take a soaking on our way to the ball, I wonder if we will all have to stay at Netherfield until we are well again? Lord! What fun it would be, especially if Mr Wickham had to stay there, too. Me and Kitty are going to dance with him half the night apiece, and the other half we are going to dance with the rest of the officers. We both intend to marry a man in a red coat.

I cannot wait for this evening, the time is going so slow. Mr Collins is prosing on and Lizzy is telling me I must behave and Mama is talking of nothing but Mr Bingley. Only another hour to go and then I can get dressed. I am wearing my blue sa.r.s.enet and Kitty is going in yellow.

Your affectionate friend, Lydia Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Miss Susan Sotherton Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 27 Dear Susan, You will be pleased to hear that the ballroom at Netherfield has been put to good use, for last night Mr Bingley hosted a ball. I had high hopes for the evening and I dressed with unusual care, as I was looking forward to dancing with Mr Wickham and conquering what was left of his heart, but he did not attend. But I forget, you do not know about Mr Wickham. He is new to the neighbourhood and the most amiable young man in existence. He is charming, sincere, intelligent and handsome: in short, he is my model of what a young man should be. And I believe I may say without undue vanity that he is equally pleased with me. He singled me out at my aunt's house and we spent most of the evening talking together. I looked out for him in the ballroom as soon as we arrived at Netherfield but I was disappointed in my expectations for he did not attend. He had some urgent business in town, or so Mr Denny said, but Denny knew as well as I did that Mr Wickham was driven away by Mr Darcy.

It seems that Mr Darcy's father left Mr Wickham a valuable living in his will, but Mr Darcy was jealous of the affection his father bestowed upon Mr Wickham and so he gave the living elsewhere.

I am not surprised that Mr Wickham decided to avoid the ball. I would have avoided it myself if I had known how it was going to turn out. No Mr Wickham, and instead I had to dance with Mr Darcy. I would have refused him, but he asked me so unexpectedly that I could not think of any excuse and so I was doomed to dance with the one man in the room who, above all others, I had no desire to partner. I cannot imagine why he asked me, as he seemed to take no pleasure in my company and I certainly took no pleasure in his. I could not resist the urge to question him about Mr Wickham and I was not surprised that he quickly changed the subject, but not before he had said that Mr Wickham found it easy to make friends but less easy to keep them.

I have no desire to think about Mr Darcy and yet I must admit that he puzzles me. He is a thoroughly disagreeable man, monstrous in his dealings with Mr Wickham, and yet Mr Bingley likes him; and Mr Bingley, you know, is the most pleasant of men. How can this be?

Jane is certain that there has been some misunderstanding, that Mr Darcy and Mr Wickham are both amiable men who have been set against each other by some third party, but this is impossible-and besides, Jane's opinion is not to be trusted, for when did Jane ever think ill of anyone?

It is a mystery. For my part, it can remain so. I have no interest in Mr Darcy, and if he is going to make life difficult for Mr Wickham, then I hope he will soon leave Netherfield so that we might all be comfortable again.

My dance with Mr Darcy was not the limit of my vexations. Indeed, it seemed as if almost my whole family was conspiring to disgrace themselves. Mr Collins insisted on dancing with me, and a more mortifying partner it would be impossible to imagine. He went left when he should go right, forward when he should go back, and he stood on my toes at least three times. I am beginning to fear, too, that his interest in me does not end in dancing and that he has it in mind to marry me. But I will not think of that until I am certain.

He further made himself ridiculous by attempting to ingratiate himself with Mr Darcy, as he knows Mr Darcy's aunt, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, and Mama spoke in the loudest voice about Jane and Bingley's forthcoming marriage, though nothing has been agreed upon. She would not lower her voice no matter how much I asked it of her.

As if that were not enough, Mary sang. Oh, Susan, how good it is to write to you, because you know exactly what I mean when I say that Mary sang! Why she will persist in doing it when she has no voice I do not know. Ordinarily it does no harm, but in front of Mr Bingley's sisters and Mr Darcy, who are ever looking for something to ridicule or despise, it was humiliating. I caught my father's eye, but instead of managing the situation with tact he almost pulled Mary from the piano, saying that she had delighted everyone long enough.

Caroline Bingley added her share to my vexations by trying to ridicule my friends.h.i.+p with Mr Wickham, saying that he was the son of the late Mr Darcy's steward, to which I replied that he had told me so himself. When she could not discomfit me that way, she said that Mr Darcy had always been excessively kind to Mr Wickham but that Mr Wickham had never deserved his kindness and had returned it with infamous behaviour. When I questioned her she could give me no particulars, which did not surprise me, as her motives were transparent. She sought to lower Mr Wickham in my estimation because he is the son of a steward, and the son of a steward must always come beneath a man with ten thousand a year in her eyes.

I was very glad when the evening came to an end. Mama would not leave, however, but managed by some ruse to keep us there for a quarter of an hour after everyone else had gone, so that I saw how heartily we were wished away by most of the party. Not Mr Bingley, however, for I believe he would never send Jane away of his own accord.

It was the one good thing to come out of the evening, for he sought Jane out at the start of the ball and devoted himself to her for the entire evening. I am sure he will propose to her before long, and how fortunate an outcome that will be. Jane happily settled, and married to a good and cheerful man-it is almost worth the mortifications of this evening to see that come to pa.s.s!

And now I must go to bed. I am cross and out of sorts, but I hope that things will look better in the morning.

Write to me soon, Lizzy Miss Mary Bennet to Miss Lucy Sotherton Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, November 27 Most n.o.ble Friend, I have endured many serious trials this week on account of the Netherfield ball, but you will no doubt be pleased to hear that the rigours of my intellectual pursuits have allowed me to bear the follies of my family with stoicism. Indeed, I used the occasion to impart some knowledge to my sisters. When Kitty and Lydia filled the house with their idle chatter about officers, remarking on the importance of a red coat, I told them that Hannibal had managed to cross the Alps without a red coat, and so, too, had his elephant. But my attempts to awaken them to the joys of sisterly scholars.h.i.+p fell short of my hopes, as Lydia took no notice of me but instead embarked on a long and not very interesting story about when Mr Denny pretended to be an elephant and chased her all around the room.

Jane has spent the week sighing over Mr Bingley, encouraged by Mama, and Elizabeth talks of no one but Mr Wickham, who, it seems, is a paragon of virtue. I likened him to a young Apollo, hoping to awaken in her bosom an interest in the ancient Greeks, but her brain, alas, is not suited to such erudition. Nor is my sister Lydia's, for she ran around the room shouting, 'a pollo, a pollo.' She persisted in thinking that Apollo meant 'like a chicken,' flapping her arms and squawking in a noisy manner, even when I protested that Mr Wickham was nothing like the aforementioned bird.

The only sensible conversation has come from my cousin, Mr Collins. We were both of us in agreement over the necessity of attending the ball, despite my family's expectations that we would find such an entertainment unworthy of our superior powers, but as I remarked to them at the time, I think it no sacrifice to join occasionally in evening engagements. Society has claims on us all. I was much taken with this phrase and I have written it into my book of extracts. As a maxim it is both elegant and true, for I profess myself one of those who consider intervals of recreation and amus.e.m.e.nt as desirable for everybody.

Mr Collins agreed with me. He was able to set Elizabeth's mind at rest when she feared that he might suffer a rebuke from the Archbishop or from Lady Catherine if he should venture to dance. In proof of his confidence, he asked her for the first two dances. It was very n.o.ble of him, for he could expect nothing by the way of a sensible conversation. My sister Elizabeth means well, but alas, dear Lucy, she is not a Learned Woman.

This was brought home to me when I was solicited to sing after supper. She looked at me in consternation, realising that if she had applied herself to her music as I had done, she could have been the centre of attention; and determining, no doubt, to apply herself to the pianoforte as soon as she returned home.

My performance was much enjoyed and I was gratified to think that I had brought some culture to the gathering, for Mr Bingley and his London friends expect it. Indeed, I saw Miss Bingley and her sister exchanging looks of frenzied delight, whilst Mr Darcy listened in stunned silence, amazed to have found such sophistication in the country. His frozen features showed his determination to catch every note of my performance, despite Miss Bingley's attempts to distract him.

I was preparing to embark on a third song when Elizabeth caught my father's eye and he drew me from the pianoforte, saying that I had delighted the company long enough. I was startled, for the a.s.sembled company was evidently enjoying the music, but his following words showed his real thoughts: 'Let the other young ladies have time to exhibit.' And it is true that, whilst I sang, the other young ladies were squirming with embarra.s.sment, knowing that they would have to follow my superior performance with one of their own. It would have been mortifying for them if I had continued any longer and shown their own efforts to be the effusions of mere amateurs.