Part 19 (2/2)
”Hepsibah Jane,” Esther called. A child appeared from the shadows where she'd retreated when the shouting began. ”This is my Judith's girl,” Esther said. Hepsibah Jane looked to be about five. She had a wooden sampler frame and a needle still in her hands, though judging from the big-eyed stare she fixed on the strangers it was a safe bet she hadn't taken a st.i.tch for some minutes. ”Go find thy mother, child. Quickly. Tell her Quentin Hale is here from the big house. With a guest. They are needing to be fed.”
After the little girl left not a word was spoken by any of them. Quent and Nicole sat and tried not to look at each other. Esther busied herself among the trade goods behind the long wooden counter. When she turned back to them she held a stack of clothing. ”Perhaps thee would care to try these things, Nicole Crane. If thee does not wish to wear a squaw's clothing for whatever part of thy journey lies ahead. There is a small room behind, where thee might see if these would accommodate thy needs.”
Yes, that was sensible. Whatever Quent said, she had not given up. She was going to Quebec, not Shadowbrook, and for what waited at the end of her journey, the white bearskins of an Indian squaw were certainly not suitable. Nicole nodded her thanks and stood up.
Esther led her toward the small storeroom in the rear. Quent rose. ”Judith will come quickly, Quentin,” Esther said without turning around. ”Thee need not rush away thinking thee will be much delayed.” He settled back on the bench.
Five minutes later Judith hurried in, carrying a basket filled to overflowing. ”Thee is most welcome, Quentin Hale. It is good to see thee again.”
”And you, Judith.” She was expecting another child, and glowing with the prospect. ”I had thought to see your slave-Prudence, as I recall. But I'm glad for the chance to say h.e.l.lo to you.”
”Prudence is here, but she is no longer a slave,” Judith explained as she unloaded the basket. ”She has a house of her own and makes those calico bags.” She nodded to a stack of yellow and blue drawstring bags piled high on the counter. ”The Indians quite like them as trading goods.”
”Not a slave?” Quent said quietly. ”I'm not entirely surprised.”
”It was the decision of the entire community. Many Friends are so thinking these days. We discussed it at Yearly Meeting three years past and it was agreed there would be no more slaves in Do Good. Thy father had no quarrel and no reason to complain, since the business here is done the same as always, with or without them.” She removed two large slices of meat pie from her basket as she spoke, and a pile of biscuits spread with b.u.t.ter. ”Hepsibah said there was someone with thee. I brought enough for two now and something for thy journey so-”
”I brought a young woman, a guest of my mother. She has gone with your mother to see if some proper clothes can be found for her.”
Judith looked puzzled, but Esther s...o...b..rry appeared before her daughter found a way to voice a tactful question.
The older woman beckoned him to the back of the trading post. ”Quentin, I beg thy indulgence.”
He murmured, ”Excuse me,” to Judith, then got up and went to where Esther stood waiting.
”I apologize for discussing that of which I have no knowledge,” she began, ”but among us it is a good thing to speak plainly, as thee knows.”
”I know. Speak your piece, Esther. I'm listening.”
”That young woman is sorely tried, Quentin. She is in great need of understanding, and I fear it can come only from thee. Thee must examine thy conscience and see if there is any way thou has not dealt fairly and respectfully with her.”
G.o.d help them, Esther thought he had taken advantage of Nicole, and that he was deserting her. He had no time to explain. Every moment that pa.s.sed he chafed to be on the trail, prayed that Solomon would survive until he caught up with Lantak and the others. ”Esther, I give you my word, I didn't-I mean there was nothing-Confound it! I've no idea how to explain.”
”Thee owes no explanation to me, Quentin Hale. It is that young woman who is beside herself with dismay.” She nodded toward the room behind her.
”I haven't got time right now. There's trouble, Esther. I told you-”
”Thee alone can decide where thy obligations lie, Quentin. Thee owes no explanations to me.”
What was his obligation, as Esther put it? d.a.m.n! What difference did obligation make? He loved her. He wanted to marry her, but for the moment Solomon needed him a hundred times more. Nicole was an innocent, a virgin. He knew that now, and ... Sweet Christ! How could he have been so blind? She was indeed a total innocent. And she thought that what had happened was all there was, that merely by kissing her and fondling her he had ...
He glanced back at Judith, neatly laying out the food and pretending that nothing unusual was taking place. She looked as if she would foal any day, but she moved in a permanent, joyful glow because she had a husband and a respected place in the community. What if Nicole was worried that she might have conceived a child as a result of the caresses they had shared? What if she thought he was going off and leaving her alone with some terrible shame? It was an unbearable notion.
”Give me a moment alone with her, Esther. I'd appreciate it.”
Esther s...o...b..rry stepped aside and nodded toward the door of the small storeroom where she'd taken the girl to change her clothes.
Nicole was standing beside the window, wearing a plain gray Quaker frock. A pile of bright-colored trade goods, the homespun smocks that had been dyed red and yellow and green as the Indian women preferred, were stacked on the chair beside her. Her back was to him, and he could see that beneath an austere mobcap without so much as a ribbon or a ruffle, her hair was still in a single plait hanging down between her shoulders. ”Look at me,” he said. ”I have to speak and there isn't much time.”
She turned her lovely face to him and he wondered if he could be wrong. Her expression and bearing weren't those of a frightened young woman who thought she'd been taken advantage of, they were those of a queen. ”You gave your word,” she said, ”and you are breaking it.”
”d.a.m.n it! I'm not! Can't you understand? I'll come back and we'll be the way we were yesterday by the waterfall. I love you, Nicole. I want to marry you.”
”I cannot ma-”
”Ssh. Don't say anything. Just listen to me.” He took a step closer and put his hands on her shoulders. This time she didn't push him away. ”Nothing happened between us yesterday that should not have happened, Nicole. I give you my word it did not. You are in no danger of-”
”Your word is not worth having. You have proved that.” She regretted the statement as soon as she made it. She saw first the hot rage in his eyes, then the coldness. ”Quent, I did not mean that. I have not explained very well. Please, let me try.”
His anger died as quickly as it had been born. ”Ah, my love, I need no explanations.” He put his hand beside her cheek and she allowed it to remain. ”We'll be married,” he said softly. ”As soon as I deal with the renegades and bring Solomon back to the Patent. Then I'll show you what truly happens between a man and a woman. What happened yesterday, my love, in the glen, that was only the beginning. Nothing we did can cause-”
”I cannot marry you, Quent.” She reached up and removed his hand from her cheek. ”I have sworn to be a nun.”
”A nun! Good Chr-That was no nun with me beside the waterfall yesterday. What kind of an insane-”
”Yesterday I almost forgot a vow I made to Almighty G.o.d kneeling before the Blessed Sacrament, and again at the bed of my dying maman. Yesterday is one more terrible thing for which I must do penance the rest of my life.”
”Penance ... Nicole, I don't pretend to understand your religion, but surely not even popish priests would teach that the natural way of things between a man and woman is cause for penance.'
Nicole glanced at the door. It was shut, but heaven knows what these people must think of what was happening inside. ”Ssh,” she said. ”We give scandal. I do not speak of what we did in-”
”Almost did,” he corrected in a harsh whisper. ”I told you, nothing happened that is reserved for a husband and wife.”
”I know.” She didn't, not really, but she had no reason to doubt his word about such things. ”I am trying to tell you something much worse than anything you are thinking. The little twins, Lilac and Sugar Willie ...” She took a step backward, away from him. ”They are dead because of me.”
”That's insane as well. They and the others are dead because a vicious Huron renegade named Lantak attacked the Patent. It has nothing to do with you.”
”How many others?” And when he didn't answer: ”You must tell me! How many?”
Ephraim counted blacks and whites separately. Quent didn't look at things that way. ”Eleven, not counting Solomon the Barrel Maker. He's been captured, but I am sure he's alive.” For a time at least. But if he didn't get to him quickly, Solomon would be praying for death.
”Eleven dead,” she whispered, making the sign of the cross. ”Tiens pitie, mon Dieu. And the rest? There was more destruction, I know there was, I saw it.”
”Eight horses, stolen or so badly wounded they had to be put down. Almost half the wheat crop burned. And the sawmill is totally destroyed. What do you mean, you saw it? You were in the cave behind the waterfall.”
”I saw it,” she repeated. ”Le bon Dieu showed me what I was causing by my willfulness, my refusal to honor my vow, my sin of disobedience.” She hesitated. ”And what I almost did-what I wanted to do-with you.” She stared at the floor. Her voice was so low he could barely make out what she was saying.
”We love each other. What kind of G.o.d would begrudge us that?” Even as he said the words he knew it was hopeless. She barely reached his shoulder but she was a tower of determination. By Christ, what a woman! And he was going to lose her to a nunnery, a swamp of popish superst.i.tion. It was an abomination.
”I have no right to love you.” Nicole raised her face. She was still very pale, but there were no more tears. ”Long before I met you, I had already given myself as an offering to Jesus Christ. In reparation.”
”Reparation for what? What can you have done?”
”For myself, I did nothing. I do not have that on my conscience. But I watched what others did. What my own father did. You have heard of the Jacobite Rebellion, the forty-five in Scotland? Of Culloden Moor?”
The stories of Culloden Moor had reached as far as America. It had been a field of slaughter, terrible carnage. What could such things have to do with Nicole? ”There is no joining between-”
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