Part 35 (1/2)
”I wanted to.” Tess looked up at Cara, a desperately hopeful expression on her face that shuttered in almost immediately. ”Do you think he'll ever use the arm again?”
”It was very interesting to listen to Bakhtiian and Kirill talk together when they were both drunk. You haven't told me much about the first year you spent here, Tess.””Kirill is very special to me,” said Tess in a low voice.
”So I divined from their conversation. Tess, I just came from the Veselov camp.
Kirill's arm is back in a sling, and it's hurting him like h.e.l.l, which is a good sign, but it will probably be days, even weeks, before we'll know if he can expect to use it again. But as for regaining full use-that you must not expect. If we could take him to a real hospital-”
”I know. I know.” Tess hesitated and glanced at the entrance flap of her tent, c.o.c.ked half up so that a slice of the interior was visible: the wooden table and chair, and one corner of a carved chest. ”And Ilya?”
”I'll have to study the results.”
”Cara. What about-? G.o.ds, seeing him lying there I kept thinking that that's what he'll look like when he's dead.'' Her voice dropped to a whisper. ”Can you treat him?”
Yes! Cara wanted to say, because she wanted nothing more than to try. Yet the risks . . . she forced herself to show caution. ”Are you certain this is what you wish, Tess? You must consider the consequences if we succeed, not just for yourself and for him but for everyone.”
”I won't age, not in their life spans. There's nothing I can do about that except learn how to make myself up from the actors, I suppose. Last night-he was still half drunk when I brought him back here-he told me how young I looked. No, he said, 'You look no older than the day I met you.' ” Her lips set tight. Dark circles of exhaustion showed under her eyes, giving her an anguished look. ”I know it's selfish-”
”As well as dangerous.”
”Yes. But he puts himself in danger every day. He could die any day, Cara.”
”As could you.”
”As could any of us, despite our vaunted knowledge. We may live longer, but we're not immortal.”
”And may we never be,” breathed Cara devoutly.
”But you're-”
”It's true I'd like to extend our life span, but I'm not seeking the philosopher's stone, Tess. The fountain of youth, perhaps, and yet in the end I don't think this physical human form is capable of sustaining eternal life. That's for the next evolutionary stage. Which I hope I won't be around to see.”
Tess set the empty bowl down on the carpet and drained the last of the milk in her mug. ”You're braver than I am, Cara. I can't bear to see him age so quickly. He already looks older than when we met. G.o.ds, I hate it.”
Cara sighed and laid a hand on Tess's shoulder, squeezing it. ”I'll do what I can, Tess. Which reminds me, can I do tests on Aleksi as well?”Tess stared for a long moment at the sleeping Aleksi, then lifted her gaze to watch Sonia busy over at her own tent, Kolia in equal parts hindering and helping her.
Ivan sat working with severe concentration on embroidery. Katerina and Galina had gone off together to get water. ”I want to save all of them,” she said softly.
”And the burden is harder on you knowing that you cannot.”
”It isn't right.”
”That we leave them in ignorance? But Charles is right in one thing, Tess. If we bring down our gifts en ma.s.se, we will obliterate them, their culture, and their lives.
Is the trade worth it? For them? For us, even? Perhaps they wouldn't care to live as we live. How can we choose for them?”
”The same argument,” said Tess bitterly, ”run over and over and over again.
Either way, we are right. Either way, we are wrong.”
”Do you wish you had never come here, then?”
At that moment, footfalls sounded from inside the tent, followed by a curse.
Bakhtiian pushed out from inside, fumbling with the entrance flap, and emerged out under the awning, blinking furiously, bleary-eyed and pale.
”No,” said Tess as she rose to greet him.
”G.o.ds,” he said. ”My head pounds.” He stumbled over Aleksi, waking the other man, apologized, and then saw Cara. ”Doctor.” Even in this condition, he recalled his manners. ”I thank you for your hospitality last night.” He blinked again, against the sunlight. ”I think.”
Cara laughed. ”Drink as much water as you can, Bakhtiian. I promise you'll feel better in a day or two.”
He bowed, then winced at the movement. ”You are gracious, as well as wise.”
She laughed. ”Now, if you'll excuse me.”
”Doctor, we'll be marching at dawn tomorrow.”
”Ah. Thank you for the warning.” She kissed Tess on the cheek and left them.
CHAPTER THIRTY.
”Tess,” said Aleksi, reining his horse aside and waiting with her as the line of wagons trundled past, ”are you pregnant?''
Her startled glance betrayed the truth. ”How did you know?”
”You stopped eating glariss milk and cheese, but nothing else.”
”I can't stomach it. It's strange, though. None of the other food bothers me, just that.”
”Does Ilya know?””No.”
He nodded, understanding her perfectly. ”You must be early still. Does Sonia know?”
”No one knows.”
”Not even the healer?”
”Yes, she knows.”
Aleksi smiled. ”You meant, no jaran knows. Does your brother know?”
”Of course he-” She broke off. ”How could he know, Aleksi? It's been over twelve hands of days since I've seen him.”
”I thought as much,” said Aleksi with that maddeningly knowing smile that he had.
Tess pulled a face at him and urged her mare forward as the last of the wagons in this segment of the train pa.s.sed them by. The wagons climbed steadily through the range of hills, heading for the fortress that blocked the pa.s.s that led on into the heart of the Habakar kingdom. The main army had pa.s.sed this way the day before, and Tess could read the signs of their pa.s.sage still, here in the vanguard of the great train of wagons and horses and herds that made up the jaran camp as it moved. Such signs had not yet been churned away beneath the obliterating tread of uncounted wheels and hooves and feet. Riders from Anatoly Sakhalin's jahar, augmented by the recruits for Bakhtiian's jahar of envoys, rode up and down the line at intervals, watching the hills, watching for breakdowns, urging any recalcitrant oxen along with whips. All in all, the mood of the camp was positive. They traveled incessantly in any case, Tess reflected; it was only the change of scenery that made this journey different. That and the families they had left behind on the plains.