Part 12 (2/2)

”This isn't funny, Nika.”

”No, it's not. It's sad, because you've been afraid of something that wasn't a problem.”

”The h.e.l.l it's not a problem. You have no idea what you're talking about. I bet you're still a virgin.”

”Yeah. So?”

He lurched up from the couch, set her down, and moved away from her so fast, she lost her grip on him. His gait was awkward, and he kept that sheet held in his fist so tight his knuckles turned white.

With his eyes wide and his jaw clenched, he said, ”You need to leave.”

”I thought we'd just decided I didn't need to. You don't have to be afraid to hurt me anymore. I want to have s.e.x with you.”

His whole body clenched like she'd hit him, and he spun around, giving her his back. ”Leave. Before it's too late.”

Instead, Nika walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him, pressing her chest against his wide back. Beneath her cheek, his whole body vibrated with tension. ”I want to stay.”

”I'm not going to take any virgins.”

”If that's really such a big problem for you, then I'll go find one of the teenage boys downstairs, take care of the problem, and be back in ten minutes. I understand from gossip that they don't take long to finish.”

He turned around, but she didn't let him go. He spun inside her embrace until she could feel his erection pressing against her belly. Those tinglies started to expand into something more. Something needy and hard to ignore.

”You do that, and Joseph will have to execute me for murdering a kid.”

He wasn't lying. She could see the fury in his face, feel it s.h.i.+mmering in his body. She remembered the black ma.s.s of his soula”saw it reflected in the ferocity in his eyes, and knew that she had to do something to fix it.

Unfortunately, she had no clue what that something might be.

”So what you're saying is that you don't want me, but I can't be with anyone else? Should I stay a virgin forever?”

”Works for me.”

”Are you really that selfish?”

”I won't be alive much longer. Just wait until I'm dead. That's all I ask.”

”No. I'm not making you any stupid promises. I've wasted enough of my life locked in a hospital. I won't let you or anyone else get in the way of me living.”

”What I'd do to you would not be something you'd remember fondly.”

”How do you know? What if you're the only man who can ever touch me?”

His eyes squeezed shut as if he needed to block out the sight of her. ”Please. Don't let me hurt you. I don't want to hurt you.”

”You won't. This feeling we have for each other, it proves I'm right. You and I belong together. You were looking for some kind of feeling when we touched. I'd say this counts.”

”Then why didn't my luceria come off when you pulled on it?”

”I don't know, but I have an idea.”

Madoc groaned and stared at her mouth. ”Please, Nika. You're killing me.”

She pushed him down to the couch, and like a fool, he let her.

”Maybe if you kiss me, it will come off.”

”That's not the way it works.”

”Maybe you should kiss me anyway.”

If Madoc kissed her, he knew how it would end. He'd rip that flimsy bit of fabric from her body and take her right here on his living room floor. Despite her innocent protestations to the contrary, that was not what she wanted.

She deserved to be cherished and treated with care. Loved. He couldn't give that to her. There wasn't enough left of the man he used to be to give her anything that even approached love. The best he could even hope for was to f.u.c.k her fast enough that she wouldn't suffer long.

Nika stared into his eyes, looking like she meant what she said. He knew better, but he couldn't blame her for her ignorance.

She was a virgin, and she was squirming on his lap like she didn't even know what came next.

Holy h.e.l.l. She was going to blow his mind if she didn't stop moving. He'd just explode into a b.l.o.o.d.y mess and they'd be mopping what was left of him off the ceiling for a week.

He needed to get out of there. Put some distance between them. Go kill s.h.i.+t. Something.

Pretend you have honor.

It had never been harder to follow Iain's teachings than it was now, with this willing woman so close and eager for him to kiss her.

An honorable man would have known that her kisses belonged to another and respected that. So that was what he was going to do. He was going to move away, walk out the door, and leave. Only this time, he wasn't coming back. If he did, he knew what he'd do. He knew Nika would be the one to pay.

His time was up. He'd had a good run. Killed lots of snarlies. He'd even managed to kill enough sgath that Nika was no longer quite so f.u.c.ked in the head. Sure, she wanted to screw hima”which meant she was still crazya”and had a tendency to leave her body, but at least she didn't spend all her time afraid anymore.

He'd done that for her. He could die knowing he'd accomplished at least that much.

He'd also die without knowing what it was like to kiss hera”really kiss her. He'd die never getting to hear her cries of release, or feel her slick heat around him. But he'd also die never having caused her to scream in pain he caused. That was worth suffering through this nonstop erection he was sporting.

Madoc ignored the pain pounding in his body and slid out from under Nika, knocking her sideways onto the couch.

The look of hurt s.h.i.+ning in her pale blue eyes made his stomach clench, but there was nothing he could do about that. He hoped that one day, when she finally found her Theronai, she'd look back on this and thank him for walking away.

Madoc grabbed the clothes he'd tossed onto the floor and left, shutting the door behind him. A few seconds later, he'd dressed in the hall and was headed for Tynan. He'd give the bloodsucker the blood Nika needed for her quest so she wouldn't be forced to beg for help, then leave behind his death wisha”a wish the Theronai would be honor-bound to carry out. Whatever the h.e.l.l that might be.

The only thing he really wanted he couldn't have.

Time to get over it already. Once he was dead, he wasn't going to miss a single f.u.c.king thing.

He felt naked and off balance without his sword. It had been strapped around his hips for centuries, ready and willing to shed Synestryn blood. Without it, he hardly even felt like a Theronai at all.

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