Part 18 (2/2)
”I'm sorry.” I reached my hands to my forehead and closed my eyes. It was true; I knew Angelique still had a crush on me. It had been my in with her. I had been her weakness. But now, now that I was standing here with Lucky, crying and upset with me, it wasn't worth it. None of it was worth it. Noah wouldn't have wanted me to ruin the relations.h.i.+p with the one girl I had ever loved to get my revenge.
”I thought we were finally getting through to each other. I thought you were finally being honest with me. But you're never going to be truly honest, are you?”
”I am honest with you, Lucky. I couldn't tell you about Angelique.” My voice was hoa.r.s.e and I hoped she could see how sincere I was. ”I couldn't tell you Lucky. Please believe me.”
”You couldn't tell me or you didn't want to tell me?”
”Look, it's true that we slept together once, but that was a long time ago. Last night's dinner was something that had been planned for a long time, since before we even came to Los Angeles.”
”I see.” Her face paled and she looked down.
”It wasn't a romantic dinner, Lucky.” I sighed and brought her face up to mine. ”Look at me, please. I've been working with the FBI and the DEA to catch Braydon for selling drugs. Their investigations showed that Braydon was connected to some powerful drug lords in Mexico and Braydon is one of the biggest traffickers in the city. They needed my help because he is an actor and he's well-protected. It has been hard for them to get any real dirt or concrete evidence on him. Angelique and he were good friends, and the FBI thought that, if I maintained my friends.h.i.+p with Angelique, I could get even closer to the real dirt in the group.”
Lucky frowned and looked away, but I knew she was paying attention and really listening. My heart pounded as I continued my story, hoping that Lucky would understand everything and forgive me for leaving her in the dark.
”So I've been playing friendly with Angelique, hoping she would be able to provide me with some information.”
”She knew you were trying to bring down Braydon?” Lucky's voice was hurt.
”No, no.” I shook my head. ”No one knew that Braydon was suspected of being a major drug trafficker. I couldn't tell anyone. But last night, Angelique let something slip. She told me she was leaving the country for a couple of months. I thought she meant because she was so upset over Noah, but she gave me an odd look. And then it all hit me at once.”
”What hit you?” Lucky's face was confused and I slowed down.
”I had a conversation with the Agent in charge of the case yesterday, I'm sorry I didn't tell you. He told me that Braydon had a partner, someone who was actually running the show. I thought it was Evan and I suspected Leeza of being here to do something bad to you.”
”Oh Zane.” Lucky looked upset and then angry. ”Why didn't you tell me any of this? Shouldn't I have been warned if you suspected that about my best friend?”
”I asked Leo to keep an eye on Leeza and all her movements.”
Lucky was silent and I could see her eyes becoming more distant. ”I was wrong about Evan and Leeza. I owe her an apology, I suppose.” I made a face, but Lucky didn't laugh, so I continued. ”Angelique was the partner. She was the perfect foil. No one would ever suspect a beautiful supermodel of running a huge drug cartel.”
”Angelique is a drug trafficker?” Lucky's mouth dropped open. ”What?”
”I know.” I shook my head. ”It turns out that she and Braydon have been working together for years, and she was the brains behind the whole thing.”
”She was the brains?” Lucky made such a funny face that I laughed and she scowled at me. ”I'm not forgiving you that easily, Zane. Why were you out all night?”
”I wasn't in her bed, even though she wanted me to be.” I cut myself off before I made the situation worse. ”Look, Angelique came from a very poor family, and in all her life, all she has ever wanted was money. After our alliance, I blew her off and I guess I became a bit of a challenge to her. Men didn't reject her - she rejected them. I think she convinced herself, in her own sick way, that she loved me, or rather she was trying to do everything she could to get me, to prove something to herself. I have never wanted to be with her. And I've never really liked her. Last night, when I realized that Angelique was Braydon's partner, I called my contact at the FBI. He told me to stay until they could get over there. Well, let's just say they didn't get over until about 3 a.m.”
”It's 10 a.m. now.” She glared.
”I was taken in for questioning.” I grabbed her hands. ”I'm so sorry, Lucky. Please forgive me. I never thought this would happen.”
”You thought I'd just continue being a fool in the dark, here? Waiting for you to get back from your fake business meeting?” She cried out, but she didn't remove her hands from mine.
”No, Lucky, never that. I wanted to tell you but ...” I paused at the look in her eyes.
”But you didn't trust me.” She snapped.
”I do trust you.”
”You don't trust me to look after myself or to be safe. You don't trust me, Zane. What do I have to do to show you that I love you and I'm here for you? I'm not a little kid or some fragile doll. I can handle the truth, Zane. Life has thrown some s.h.i.+t my way, as well, and I survived. I'm strong. I'm a strong woman. And I can't be in a relations.h.i.+p with someone who doesn't see that.”
”Lucky...” My heart stopped once again at her words and I imagined my life without her in it. It would be bleak and uneventful. A life without Lucky in it would be no life at all. ”Please don't leave me. I do trust you. I swear to G.o.d. The FBI told me to keep it to myself for the sake of your safety and the case.”
”You still should have told me.” Her stare was obstinate and I caressed her face.
”Please be patient with me, Lucky. I'm trying my best to be the man that you want. But it's hard for me to give up that control. I'm scared you're going to walk out and leave me. I'm scared I'm going to lose you. I've never felt these emotions before and I love them. They make me feel alive. They make me feel like I never have to worry, ever again. But sometimes, that old devil jumps on my shoulder and whispers in my ear, and I get worried, and angry, and afraid.”
”There is nothing to be worried about, Zane.” She held my hand next to her cheek. ”I'm not your mom, I'm not going to leave you.”
”I just want you to be safe, Lucky. Please know that I would never have done anything with Angelique last night. I can't even look at another girl. You're it for me, Lucky. You're the one.”
”I need to see it.” She rested her head on my shoulder and looked up at me. ”Last night, I thought my heart was breaking. I was so scared and worried. I didn't know what happened to you. I even thought that, maybe there had been another car accident, and that something had happened to you.”
”Oh no. I'm sorry I didn't even think about that.” I held her in my arms as she cried, and I felt her body trembling against mine.
”I was so scared, Zane. I didn't know what had happened and you weren't returning my calls. And then after Braydon told me about Angelique, I didn't know what to think.”
”Don't remind me of Braydon. I'm going to have a serious conversation with Leo.”
”Please don't.” She looked up at me. ”He doesn't know I saw Braydon. Don't be mad at him.”
”He should have known and seen everything. He was supposed to be your bodyguard.”
”Oh please Zane, don't blame him. I don't want this to affect his payment.”
”Payment?” I looked at her and laughed. ”Leo's richer than I am.”
”He is?” She looked surprised. ”Then why is he a bodyguard?”
”He's not really.” I shook my head. ”It's a long story and it's not mine to tell.”
”Oh.” She looked disappointed and I took her hand and led her to the backyard. I wanted to go to the living room, but didn't want Leeza to be hiding somewhere, listening to our conversation.
”It's not that I don't want to tell you, but it's not really my place.” I squeezed her hand as we sat down on the lounge chair. ”But if you want me to, I will.”
”No, that's okay.” She smiled at me briefly. ”I hope one day he'll tell me himself.” I watched her face as she spoke and I was annoyed at the pleasant tone she had for Leo. ”I like him a lot.” She continued. ”I hope we become real friends.”
”I see.”
”Oh Zane, don't be stupid.” She poked me in the ribs and I looked up to see her shaking her head. ”I don't like Leo like that, okay? You don't need to get all pouty and jealous.”
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