Part 23 (1/2)
”Fell in love with ye?” She repeated the words after him still in that even somewhat puzzled quiet which was, for her, almost toneless. ”Jack Halloway, when ye went away from hyar yestiddy evenin' an' I'd sat thar fer a full measured hour an' thought, I 'lowed thar warn't a soul on earth ner in h.e.l.l thet I hated so much as you. I'd done med up my mind ter kill ye afore I laid down ter sleep.”
There was an implacability about this new manner, that disquieted the man a little, but he said gravely:
”Them feelin's jest comes about because what ye felt yestiddy war all new ter ye. Hit's nat'ral enough, but hit won't endure.”
She went on ignoring his protestations. ”Ther only reason I _didn't_ kill ye, war thet I'd done _let_ ye . . . an' I hated myself next es bad es you. Folks tells me thet I hain't always goin' ter want ter turn men back. Mebby thet's true.”
”Ye knows full well a'ready, thet hit's true,” he declared vehemently.
”Be thet es. .h.i.t may, no man's ter wed me without he wooes me fust, an'
no man hain't never goin' ter lay a hand on me without I consents. Now I aims ter try an' fergit erbout yestiddy--an' you'd better fergit hit too.”
The man's eyes broke into vehement challenge. ”So long es thar's life in me I won't fergit hit!”
”I reckon ye'd better heer me out,” she reminded him with an ominous note and he nodded his head, waiting, while she continued.
”Yestiddy I seemed crazed--but terday I hain't. Ye 'pears ter be right sartain thet I loves ye. I don't know, but I either loves ye or I hates ye like all h.e.l.l. Ef I loves ye I kain't kill ye--an' ef I hates ye thar's time enough.”
”But Alexander, you do love me! I know----”
”Wa'al, I don't--an' thet's a right pithy point ter my manner of thinking! Ye're a right masterful sort of feller, an' ye likes ter plow yore way through life gloryin' in yore strength an' forcin' your will on weaker folks.” She paused an instant then added significantly: ”But I'm a right masterful sort of woman myself--an' I hain't ter be nowise driv. Ef you an' me kain't consort peaceable I reckon we'll jest erbout rake h.e.l.l afore we finishes up our warfare.”
As he looked at her his admiration was flaming. Possibly it was best, just now, to advance slowly.
”I'm willin' ter wait,” he conceded slowly. ”Ye're wuth hit.”
”Ye says I loves ye. If I finds thet out fer myself, in due course I'll wed with ye. Ef I don't, I won't, but----” Her voice broke so suddenly out of the quiet plane in which it had been pitched, that her climax of words came like a sharp thunder clap on still air. ”But ef ye seeks ter fo'ce me, or ef ever ergin ye lays a hand on me or teches me, 'twell I tells ye ye kin, afore G.o.d in Heaven, one of us has got ter die! An' I won't never be with ye unarmed, nuther.”
Halloway did not judge it a good time to mention that her allusion to marriage left a rather wide territory of debate open. One thing at a time seemed enough and more than enough.
Alexander had not asked him in, and he inquired calmly: ”Now thet ye've stated yore terms an' I've done agreed ter 'em, hain't ye goin' ter invite me in?”
”No,” she said shortly. ”I makes ther laws in my own household. Ye air goin' away an' ye hain't comin' back hyar fer one week. I aims ter be left alone fer a spell now. Ef them terms don't suit ye, ye needn't come back at all.”
And in that week of reprieved decision Alexander took her life to pieces and searchingly examined it, item by item. Some strange reactions were taking place in the laboratory of her life. She was no more seen in breeches and boots. She had self-contemptuously decided that if she could not hold undeviatingly to her strongest tenet, but became a palpitant woman when a man seized her in his arms, she would throw overboard the whole sorry pretense.
She would henceforth be frankly and avowedly a woman, but a woman different from those about her, giving up none of the leaders.h.i.+p that was in her blood or the self-pride that was her birthright.
One afternoon she met Jerry O'Keefe on the road, and with the old unabashed twinkle in his eye he accosted her.
”I heer tell ther big feller's back,” he began and the girl flushed.
”Hev ye done run him offen yore place, too?”
”Thet's my business.”
”Yes _thet_ is, but yore runnin' me off's right severely _mine_.”
”Mebby I've got a rather who comes thar.”
”So hev I.” There was a lurking, somewhat engaging impertinence even in Jerry's quietest rejoinders, a humorous boldness and self-confidence.