Part 14 (1/2)

”I'm sorry, Lance-um, Lacey,” Roger said. ”I am so sorry. I will do whatever I must to make things right.”

”That's nice, Dad.” Lacey removed his hand from her arm. ”But I fear it's already too late.” She turned to Jordan and Kevin. ”I'd like to go home now.”

For as long as the place would still be her home.

”BRO, can I come in?”

Lacey's apprehensive voice reached Bro m.u.f.fled through the door. ”Whatever.”

Bro lay in bed, hands behind his back, his eyes closed. He knew he was being utterly selfish, demanding all or nothing from Lacey, who was already between a rock and a hard place. Yet he couldn't stop himself. He could accuse his raging teenage hormones for that, but in the end he was well aware it was his breaking heart that was responsible for the furor. Perhaps the heart truly was the most selfish organ.

The door opened and closed. Silence lay thick and heavy in the bedroom. Which was ridiculous because normally there was nothing they couldn't talk about.

”I'm sorry, Bro,” Lacey said timidly. ”I can't stay, not now.”

Bro couldn't keep his big mouth shut. ”Would it be so bad to stay here with us-with me-and go to school here?”

”No.” Her voice was barely a whisper, and Bro heard the sobs kept at bay.

”Then why-”

”I already owe so much to all of you-”

”d.a.m.n your pride!” Bro opened his eyes and jumped up to his feet. Lacey stood by the door, lovely as ever in her pretty white dress and stockings, frail like a fine piece of porcelain. And Bro felt like the proverbial bull in the china shop, stumbling around wrecking things. ”You don't owe me anything! I'm the one who owes you everything I have, my whole life. For loving me, and for letting a silly oaf like me love you back....”

”I love you, Bro. I do love you. So much.” She was looking at the ground, as if trying to fold in on herself and be as small and invisible as possible.

”Then don't leave!” He was yelling now, and he never did that with her, not given her background. Lacey winced and looked even more delicate and breakable. His rage forgotten, Bro begged, ”Stay with me, Lace. I need you.”

”I can't.” She shook her head a bit, appearing sh.e.l.l-shocked and tired, too. ”Valerie's here. We're gonna pack, and leave as soon as we-”

”What, now? Already? What about graduation?” Bro asked, petrified at the speed at which everything was moving, specifically rus.h.i.+ng away from him.

”I'll have to miss it, or go to it in Seattle.” Lacey was leaning against the door, as if she didn't have even enough strength to keep herself upright. ”I don't mean to be cruel, Bro. But if our roles were reversed, would you be so casual about living on the pity and charity of others?”

He wanted to embrace her so bad, and force her to see it had nothing to do with pity. ”It's not charity. It's love, and family, and us.”

”It's money you and your family don't have, and a place in the household reserved for guests-”

”You're not a guest, Lace. You're my....” Only she wasn't his girl anymore, was she? Bro's words trailed off, and they didn't come back. He would have fought for her and for the two of them through thick and thin, all the way to the bitter end. Now the fight had been taken from him. He was too late, and in a few moments she would be gone forever. Maybe there was no reason to prolong this agony they both clearly felt.

Lacey made a move, as if to come to him, but then she didn't. Bro was partially glad. He couldn't have let her go if she ever came close enough again. They would need the Jaws of Life to detach him from her then.

Quietly she turned and left the room, un.o.bstructed. He had wanted to commit Lacey's face, body, and personality to memory with a slow exploration, but now all he had was memories of times gone by and no more chances to add new ones to that pleasant cavalcade.

Bro stood in place, feeling like the world had caved in on him. Though he didn't want them, streams of tears flowed unbidden mere seconds later. From now on he would be alone, living with half a soul.

Chapter 12.

IN LESS LESS than two hours, Lacey was sitting on an uncomfortable green plastic monstrosity called an airport waiting area seat. She hadn't cried yet. Her eyes were devoid of moisture. She felt numb, as if all of this was happening to someone else, an alien ent.i.ty within her body, taking over her life only to destroy it. than two hours, Lacey was sitting on an uncomfortable green plastic monstrosity called an airport waiting area seat. She hadn't cried yet. Her eyes were devoid of moisture. She felt numb, as if all of this was happening to someone else, an alien ent.i.ty within her body, taking over her life only to destroy it.

”You all right, sweetie?” Valerie asked next to her, touching her arm gently.

Lacey gave a weak smile. ”Yes.”

She held her fibergla.s.s violin case in her lap but wondered if anything but blue notes would ever ring out of it again. She clutched it with both hands, like her last lifeline.

She had spoken with Audrey on the phone as they had driven to the airport, but she couldn't make herself see her one last time. A good-bye with her best friend would surely end her, and then she would be reduced to a mere puddle of tears. Audrey had been both sad and angry that Lacey would leave without saying good-bye, but in the end Lacey hoped she understood her position. They had ended the call with promises of frequent contact, and Lacey hoped she would be able to deliver on her word. Audrey was one of the best things that had ever happened to her.

”Would you like something to drink, Lacey?” Valerie asked, startling her. ”I could get you some tea from the cafe. That always calms my nerves.” Her warm voice was indicative of who she was as a person, kind and empathic.

”Sure, that'd be nice. Thanks.” She prayed her poor attempt at a smile worked better on her aunt than on her own mood.

Valerie moved off with a smile, in search of tea. Lacey slumped deeper into the horrid chair.

Then she just couldn't take it anymore and leave things the way they were.

She dug out her cell phone and dialed Bro's number. Please, pick up. Please Please, pick up. Please. The wait was excruciating and felt like forever as the ringtone sounded again and again.

Finally the line clicked open, but Lacey heard only heavy breathing.

”Bro...?” she asked tentatively.

”Lace?” He sounded hoa.r.s.e and m.u.f.fled, and rustling came from the background. He was in bed, and judging from his raspy voice he had been crying. Not that he would ever admit it to her.

”Yes, it's me.” She was worried beyond belief. ”Is everything okay?”

Complete silence fell in an instant. ”You're f.u.c.king kidding, right?” came the snarky, incredulous reply.

Lacey didn't want to argue anymore. ”If I were with you right now, lying next to you in bed, what would we do? What would you do to me?” He may not have been there beside her, but whenever she closed her eyes, even blinked, he was there, gorgeous and young and laughing and teasing, and everything was all right.

The awkward silence dragged on. ”A-are you serious...? This is one of... those those calls?” calls?”

Lacey gave a weird, hollow laugh. ”Yes. Tell me, honey. Please. I want... I want to remember you like that, when you play with me, laugh with me... love me. Please...?”

Bro sneezed, and then his voice came through clearer. ”If you were here, Lace, I'd give you the sun and the moon and the world and everything.”

”That's a lot.” Lacey blinked away hot, itching tears. Her feet came up from the floor, curling beneath her as she folded herself together, compressed tight.

”I'd kiss you, baby. First I'd kiss your cheeks where the tears are.”

Was he psychic or what? She wiped a few big drops off before they slid down any farther, and she closed her eyes, sinking into the sea of sensations his voice created. ”Then what?”