Part 19 (1/2)

”Yes, ma'am. I wanted to take the train with April, and then be able to drive us back this evening.” Justin grinned across the kitchen to where April was stirring sugar into her coffee. ”I won't have her out too late, Sue.”

”Well, that's a relief,” she teased. ”You're looking well. Lori, of course, has been keeping me up to date.”

Justin nodded and sipped at his drink, his eyes warm. ”Thanks. Good to reconnect with your family, too.” A quick look touched April palpably. ”Mom's been pretty discreet over the years, so it's been good to catch up.”

April nodded slowly. ”It has been.”

Hannah slurped some of her cocoa. ”So are you really walking to the train? You're gonna take a train? Mom? I want to ride the train.” Another slurp. ”Mr. Clark? You're gonna show Mom how it works, right? So she can take me?”

”Hannah!” April rolled her eyes and polished off her coffee. ”The world does not revolve around you. Just remember that.”

Her mother scoffed and moved to kiss her granddaughter on the head. ”Well, my world will today, sweets. So we'll make it a great day.”

Justin pa.s.sed very close to April on his way to the sink to rinse out his cup. ”Ready? I know it's cold, but the walk will feel great.”

”I'm from Southern California,” she groused, only partly feigning her annoyance. She loved how pretty the neighborhood looked with the light blanket of navigable snow, but she wasn't used to winter feeling like, well, winter. ”Cold is not great, yet.”

Her mom laughed. April rolled her eyes. C'mon, Mom, quit flirting. Okay, so her mother wasn't actually flirting, but she was being all girly and that made April feel a bit inadequate. And she didn't even know why.

”Let's go,” she suggested, pus.h.i.+ng away from the counter and walking around it to where Hannah was seated on a high stool. ”Have a good day with Gramma.”

”I will, Mom.”

”Love you.”

”You, too!” Hannah gave her a slightly chocolatey kiss on the cheek and April reciprocated. ”Don't forget your camera! I want to see pictures of the train!”

Knowing in advance that there would be a lot of walking that day, April was wearing her new favorite walking shoes-a pair of black, thick-soled Mary Janes that were water-repellent and extremely comfortable. She wore them with heavy black tights and a below-the-knee denim skirt. Not knowing exactly what Justin had planned, she wanted very much to be ”dressed” if they went to a restaurant as well as ”comfortable” if they spent the day taking in museums. So she had a black leather coat over a pink cashmere sweater. Outfitting themselves for a winter that had actual snow had been an adventure for her and Hannah.

Wearing a black, cable knit sweater over a white s.h.i.+rt and a light, all-weather coat, Justin looked like he was fully acclimated to the Maryland winter. ”Thank you,” he said once they'd stepped beyond the boundaries of the yard and were making snow-crunched steps on the pavement. ”Thanks for giving me a day.”

Heat flooded her cheeks. ”Thanks for being patient and waiting for it.”

”It's been less than two months since I asked, April. Not a significant amount of time if you count all the years we go back.”

”Yeah,” she said, watching her step. She slipped anyway, but Justin caught her with one arm wrapped around her back. ”Thanks. I am so blus.h.i.+ng now.”

He chuckled. ”You are, but you look fantastic.”

He let his arm slide down and around, but he didn't let her go. He simply took her hand in his. Even through two sets of leather gloves, she was aware of warmth and a feeling of safety.

Safety. It had been a long time since she'd felt protected like this. Even in so casual a way. Oh, she had had security at first, after John died, but when her name had ceased to appear in the news outlets, she had let them go. Let them go and run away, really, across the country to where she hoped she'd feel . . . normal?

Smiling shyly at Justin, whose expression radiated contentment, she was surprised at how normal she felt. They had stories to tell one another today, she understood that. She just didn't know how significant those accounts would be. To either of them.

”So we're going to the train, right?”

”Yep. I've got a plan.”

It felt odd, being out without Hannah. Odd and disconnected, but also carefree. The feeling slid through her limbs and she swung the hand joined with Justin's, just as if they were small children together. ”Good. I'm really looking forward to it.”

He explained to her about the different trains they'd be taking to get into D.C. while they stood at the station and, when their train arrived, he stepped up into their car ahead of her so he could help her in from in front of her and not from behind. She was grateful. She slipped and his hand enveloped her forearm with sure strength.

If he had been behind her, he might have had to catch her with his arms around her, she was pretty sure. That would have been embarra.s.sing.

”You okay?” His eyes were warm.

She could feel the heat in her skin under that look. ”Yeah, thank you.” Part of her actually wanted to say something flirtatious, like, Good hands, Marine, or the ridiculous You're so strong! but she refrained. Long ago, she had put herself forward for this man and he'd ignored her. The memory of how that felt lingered, even as he had been showing her for about two months that he was investing himself in her. They still talked about movies, as they had before, but now he asked about Hannah, too. And their current lives-not their pasts, as they had silently decided to save that talk-with their different occupations and so on. His dedication to his unit, her endeavors to find something useful to do that would not take away from her time with Hannah.

It was effective, and April knew that he was serious about her. He hadn't pushed to see her, but daily emails, texts, and phone calls had been communicating more than just his words.

Just as the expression in his eyes was on the train into D.C.

”So, what are we going to be up to today?” she asked, trying not to sound nervous. Part of her felt embarra.s.sed about that, but mostly . . . she didn't.

His eyes danced. ”I've got an itinerary,” he told her, reaching for her hand and turning slightly in his seat. He was sitting on the aisle and the misty light from the overcast day clarified every aspect of his face. ”If it doesn't snow too much,” he went on with a nod toward the window behind her head, ”we should be able to get it all in.”

His enthusiasm was contagious. ”Sounds busy! All right, tell me.”

”Well, the only real time constraint we have is that I made dinner reservations . . .”

April felt her smile grow as he told her about the place where they'd filmed St. Elmo's Fire and the Smithsonian.

”I thought we'd just catch the Museum of American History today, but if you want to come back to see some of the others? You know most of my weekends are free for the time being.” He also mentioned the National Archive where President Lincoln's telegrams were on display, as well as ideas for lunch and perhaps a stroll in front of the White House, time permitting.

April felt overwhelmed and ducked her head. ”That took a lot of work to plan.”

”You're worth it.”

She turned away a little and tried to focus on the pa.s.sing, winter-bare scenery. ”John used to say that,” she whispered, knowing Justin would hear her.

There was a pause, then, ”He was right.”

”I had to be reminded, sometimes.”

She could hear Justin's sigh as he tugged gently at her hand in a silent invitation to turn to him again. ”Tell me?”

Nervous, she drew her lips into her mouth to moisten them. Was it time? The deep blue eyes across from her beckoned, his lips pressed together as if he were restraining himself against his own wishes. It wasn't as if she hadn't told him time and again what had happened. She had. Often.

Maybe she could start there.

Ignoring the fact that her heart was pounding, she began. ”I used to tell you about it, you know. I mean, right after.”

”Right after I didn't answer?”

”Yes.” She couldn't watch him as she spoke, but she paid careful attention to the changes in pressure he exerted on her hands as he held them. Around them was the constant rumble of the train and she felt it sway slightly as it took curves in the track. These things soothed her so that she felt able to continue. ”I'd talk to my mirror, or when I was cleaning up in my cla.s.sroom after the kids left for the day. I didn't get it, you know? Why would you completely blow me off?”

”April, I-”

Firming her expression, she met his. ”No. Let me just do this, okay?”