Part 24 (1/2)
”That's so stupidly simple it can't be right.”
”Right,” he agreed, remembering how similarly stupidly simple the solutions to the Challenges of the Good Magician's castle in Xanth had been. Yet none of them had been obvious ahead of time. Magician Humfrey just seemed to have a way of making ordinary folk feel stupid.
They walked down the far side of the castle. There, halfway, was a small door. They tried it, and it opened. They had found the way in, pa.s.sing the second Challenge.
Inside was a large chamber with a raised stage at the far end. There was painted scenery, and several people before it. A man was directing the exact placement of the scenery, and giving the others admonitions for their performances. It was a rehearsal for a play, and it was just beginning.
”I'm not sure we belong here,” Forrest said.
The Director turned. ”Be silent and sit down, or I'll throw a curse at you.”
”Curse fiends!” Imbri whispered. ”Don't annoy them.”
Forrest had heard about the curse fiends. They lived in a castle under Lake Ogre Chobee. They all had the same talent, that of throwing curses, and they put on plays. They didn't like interference or compet.i.tion. Sensible folk stayed well clear of them.
He looked at the door, but it had closed and barred itself. They would get hit by a barrage of curses if they tried to get out, because the door would surely make a lot of noise, disturbing the play. That was the way of such things. So he looked for the nearest chair, and Imbri looked also. They would have to watch the play rehearsal. Maybe they could get away when the intermission came.
There were two empty seats in the audience. Unfortunately they were not together. So Forrest had to sit between two young men, while Imbri sat between two women.
”h.e.l.lo,” the man on the left whispered. ”I am Justin Case. My talent is to always have just the thing someone needs.”
”h.e.l.lo,” the man on the other side whispered. ”I am his twin brother Justin Time. My talent is to have my brother present just when he is needed.”
”I am Forrest Faun. My talent is to care for my tree.”
”Well, that is surely a worthy endeavor,” Justin Case said in a disparaging tone. ”At least it lacks the frustration I experience. I always have what others need, but never what I myself need.”
”Our talents don't work on ourselves,” Justin Time explained. ”I am never in time to do myself any good, and I don't help my brother either.”
”I am sorry to hear that,” Forrest said. ”I can see that it must be very frustrating.”
”Yes. We'd give anything to have even one bit of selfish good fortune, like marrying two lovely young women and living happily ever after.”
Forrest wished he could help them, and wondered whether he should give them the dear horn to use. But then the stage was called to order, and the play began, so that had to wait.
An old man stepped to the center of the stage. ”The Curse Fiends present Raven, a play in one act by Sofia Socksorter, the Good Magician's wife.” he stepped away.
A young man came on the stage and stood before a painted mountain. ”I am called Son,” he announced. ”I am the unacknowledged son of Magician Grey and Sorceress Ivy.” He looked at his feet. ”It seems they took too long to marry, so when the stork brought me, they weren't ready. So I was raised in an orphanage, with no proper name. But now I am eighteen, and ready to claim my heritage. But first I must perform some significant service for the King, so that I may earn my recognition. I also want to prove that my talent of the ability to manipulate people's minds is truly Magician caliber, because someone claims that it's not that my mother Ivy Enhanced it to make it seem greater than it is. So now I will go to Prove Myself and Seek my Fortune.” Son marched in the direction marked To, which was his near future.
Meanwhile the light on him faded, and another brightened on another part of the stage, showing a painting of a fancy castle. Inside the castle sat a man on a throne. The man wore a crown. ”I am King Dolph,” he announced. ”I am the human ruler of Xanth. My talent is to a.s.sume any form I wish to.” He suddenly turned into a dragon, then into a male harpy, then into a unicorn. He returned to man form. ”But today I am receiving visitors, in case any member of my kingdom has a comment or complaint.” He glanced to the side. ”Queen Electra, who is here?”
A woman wearing blue jeans and a crown appeared. ”It's a man who claims to be your real father.”
”This should be interesting. Send him in.”
Electra pushed an electric buzzer. A buzz sounded, and a door opened. A man entered the royal chamber. He looked somewhat scruffy ”So you claim to be my true father?” King Dolph inquired. ”Don't you know that I am the son of King Emeritus Dor and Queen Emeritus Irene? That was established long ago.”
”No it wasn't,” the man said. ”You were delivered to me, but I was busy cutting magic canes, so I set you under a cabbage leaf in the Castle Roogna garden and went on with my work. Before I could return for you, Queen Irene discovered you, and claimed you for her own. There wasn't much I could do, because I had to deliver my load of canes to the local store immediately or I wouldn't get paid for them. By the time I had done that, I had forgotten all about the matter. But now I have remembered, so I have come to fetch you home and put you to work cutting more canes, so I can retire.”
King Dolph did not look entirely pleased by this news. ”It is true that I was found under a cabbage leaf, but that's because the stork was unable to get into the closed castle.”
”No it wasn't,” the man insisted. ”It's because I put you there. My wife was most upset when I mentioned it this morning, and insisted that I set the matter to rights immediately.”
”I will have to ponder this,” King Dolph said. ”Come back next week.”
” My wife won't like the delay.”
”Here is a pretty bead. Give her that to distract her.” King Dolph plunged his hand into the Royal Treasury and fished out a sparkling bead. He gave it to the man.
”Gee, she'll like that,” the man said, departing with the bead.
”Next,” King Dolph said in a businesslike manner.
”That will be Son,” Queen Electra said. ”He just arrived.” She pressed her buzzer.
Son entered. ”And what can I do for you?” King Dolph inquired politely.
”I am your unacknowledged cousin Son. I want you to send me on a significant quest, so I can prove myself and claim my rightful heritage as a member of the royal family and maybe marry a nice princess.”
”That's a worthy ambition,” King Dolph agreed. ”Very well: go find out whether the man with the bead really is my true father.”
”Okay. I'll go to Stork Headquarters and check the records.”
”Do that.”
Son exited. The light faded on the King and followed Son. He walked slowly across the stage, and the scenery moved past him in the opposite direction, showing his progress. But before he got to the Stork Works he encountered a pretty girl. She had long dark hair with a matching dark temper.
”I say,” Son inquired, ”are you by any chance a princess?” For he had always been intrigued by dark-tempered girls; there was just something about them. His att.i.tude on stage showed this clearly.
”No, I am merely Raven, an ordinary person whose talent is to change the color of my eyes to match my moods.” Her eyes brightened as she spoke.
”Too bad,” he said with real regret. ”For I mean to marry a princess.”
”Too bad,” she agreed, her eyes darkening moodily. ”For you are a handsome man with the look of a Magician about you. I mean to marry a Magician.”
”Well, maybe you'll find one. Are you going my way?”
”I believe I am. Shall we travel together until we separate?” Her eyes turned hopeful blue.
”That works for me.” So they walked together, and the scenery moved on behind them to show their joint progress.
”Shall I tell you my abbreviated life history as we travel?” Raven inquired as the scrolling scenery threatened to become repet.i.tive, and therefore in need of distraction from.
”I am always interested in the life histories of pretty girls,” Son said. ”Even if they aren't princesses.”
So she told him her story. ”My mother wanted me to be a powerful Sorceress. She wasn't much impressed with my eye colors.” Her eyes turned motley dull depressive brown. ”So she made a deal with a demon.
The demon gave me a bottle on a cord around my neck. It enables me to take s.n.a.t.c.hes of other people's talents and store them inside the bottle. Then I can use these samples of magic.”
”Oh, I say now-could I use any of those talents? I can think of some that would be really handy.”