Part 30 (1/2)
The drive to the Austin airport was a long one and it gave them time to talk about a variety of topics. One was the differences in their upbringing. Noah was an only child, whereas Jordan came from a gaggle of siblings, as she referred to her brothers and sister. Noah didn't realize the importance of having his own s.p.a.ce because he'd always had it. Jordan told him how she had longed to have a little privacy. Her biggest complaint, however, was being constantly teased by her brothers. Noah laughed as she recounted some of the pranks they had played on her and her sister when they were young. He thought growing up in such a big family was a blessing-a constant party.
Occasionally there were pauses in the conversation, but Jordan felt so comfortable with him, she didn't need to fill the silences with small talk. They had been in the car a couple of hours before she finally got up the nerve to ask him to explain an earlier remark he'd made that had bothered her.
”Do you remember telling me you knew what I was all about? What did you mean by that?”
He glanced over at her. ”You sure you want to know?”
How bad could it be? ”I'm sure.”
”I've known you for a long time, and I know how your mind works, especially where men are concerned. You like control. You'd like to control everyone and everything.”
”That's not true.”
He ignored her denial. ”You especially like to control the men you date. I've met some of them, Sugar, and I know what I'm talking about. You go for the weak ones. But then if you can walk all over them, you don't want them. I'll bet you haven't slept with any of them. Maybe that's why you choose that type, so you won't get involved. I'm right, aren't I?”
”No, you're wrong,” she insisted. ”I like sensitive men.”
”But you went to bed with me. And I sure as certain am not sensitive.”
”You make me sound terrible,” she said.
”You're not terrible, you're a sweetheart. A bossy bossy sweetheart,” he added with a grin. sweetheart,” he added with a grin.
”And I do not want to control anyone,” she said vehemently.
”I'm not worried. You'll never control me.”
She folded her arms. ”Why do you think I would want to? And don't you dare tell me I can't stop myself.”
”You're getting upset.”
Duh. ”And about s.e.x...” she began.
”What about it?”
”Are you familiar with the expression 'What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas'?”
”Yes,” he replied. ”I've seen the commercials.”
”All right,” she said. ”I'm proposing that what happened between us in Serenity stays in Serenity. We're bound to run into each other sometime or other on Nathan's Bay. You'll be fis.h.i.+ng with one of my brothers and I'll be checking in with the family and I don't want you to feel awkward...” She stopped when she realized what she was saying. ”Okay, you wouldn't feel awkward, but I don't want you to worry about me feeling awkward.” She was making a mess of her speech. ”Do you understand what I'm trying to say?”
”Yes,” he replied. ”Why are you worried about-?”
”I just am,” she interrupted. ”My question is: Do we have a deal?”
”If it will make you happy...”
”Do we have a deal?”
”Yes.”
She thought it might be pus.h.i.+ng the matter to suggest that they shake hands, but she was happy to have it settled. It shouldn't be too difficult to pretend that nothing extraordinary had happened. She was a pro at pretending. She could even pretend she hadn't fallen in love with him...couldn't she?
BY THE TIME J JORDAN ARRIVED HOME, IT WAS WELL AFTER IT WAS WELL AFTER midnight. Noah carried her bags up to her brownstone apartment, checked each room just to make sure everything was as it should be, then kissed her good-bye and left without a backward glance. midnight. Noah carried her bags up to her brownstone apartment, checked each room just to make sure everything was as it should be, then kissed her good-bye and left without a backward glance.
He was already moving on, she thought. And she needed to do the very same thing.
When she fell into bed, she immediately crashed, and slept hard. In the morning, she opened her eyes and instinctively reached for Noah, but he wasn't there. Feeling groggy and disoriented, she threw off the covers, put on her favorite ratty old robe, and padded into the kitchen. She pushed the play b.u.t.ton on her answering machine as she walked past, and while she made herself a cup of hot tea, she listened to her messages. All forty-nine of them.
Three of the messages were from Jaffee. He wanted to know just how serious the delete b.u.t.ton was because he had accidentally hit it when he was trying to save all his recipes and had lost them. He hoped he could get them back. Would she send him an e-mail telling him what to do, if indeed anything could be done?
”My computer mail is working fine,” he explained. ”I haven't messed that up, so I'll get your reply. I've already left you two phone messages, and this is the third, and I'm guessing you aren't even home yet. Please check your messages on your computer when you get in.”
How serious was the delete b.u.t.ton? Jordan smiled. She guessed there really were people who needed extensive training on computers. Jaffee, was one of them. She would phone him later. After she listened to and erased the rest of the messages, she carried her cup of tea across the living room, curled up in the window seat that overlooked the Charles River, and stared out the window at nothing in particular.
Love wasn't all it was cracked up to be. How long was she going to be miserable? Since she'd never really loved anyone the way she loved Noah, she didn't have a timeline. She hoped that phase one of getting over him was feeling sorry for herself, because she was now wallowing in self-pity.
In no hurry to get dressed, she stayed in her pajamas until the middle of the afternoon. Around three p.m. she got a glimpse of herself in the mirror and cringed. So she took a shower and got dressed.
Nick called just after she'd put in her contacts.
”I was just about to call you,” she said. ”How's Laurant? I don't want to phone the hospital and disturb her if she's sleeping. Can she have visitors?”
”She's okay,” he said. ”The doctor wants to keep her another day at least, and I'm keeping the visitors to a minimum so she'll rest.”
”I won't come today,” Jordan said. ”Give her a kiss for me and tell her I'll be by tomorrow.”
”Be ready to answer a lot of questions,” Nick said.
Oh, G.o.d, what did Laurant know? ”Why?” she asked nervously. ”What questions? Why would Laurant want to ask me questions?” Could Jordan have sounded any guiltier? Did Nick notice?
”Jordan, what's the matter with you?”
Of course he'd noticed. ”What's the matter?” she replied. ”Nothing's the matter. I was just wondering why your wife would want to question me.”
”Oh, I don't know. Maybe she wants to ask you about those bodies you found,” he said sarcastically.
”Oh, yes. The bodies. The dead bodies.” She could not believe she'd forgotten about them. ”Okay, then. I'll answer her questions.”
”Are you angry with me? Is that why you're acting so squirrelly?”
So much for her brother's hotshot detective skills. ”Um, that's right, I am.”
”Tell me why.”