Part 2 (1/2)

Forrester turned, then wished she hadn't when the inside of her skull failed to move as quickly as the outside. The man behind her looked as if he had just climbed out of a body-bepple tank. His golden fur glowed, his small black nose was moist and s.h.i.+ny and his little b.u.t.ton-eyes shone with health and vitality. He was so muscular that his robes were tight around his chest, and bulged at the seams. For a moment, Forrester hated him.

'Who the h.e.l.l are you?' she said.

'Cwej. Chris Cwej.' His eyes scanned her in the usual way that people did when they were looking for examples of body-bepple. He'd have to look a lot closer than that if he wanted to see how she'd changed herself.

'Isn't it p.r.o.nounced ”Shvey”?' she asked.

'Nope.' He shook his head. 'Too many people got confused. I stick to ”Cwej”: it's easier.' He smiled. 'I'm supposed to report to Adjudicator Secular Ras.h.i.+d.

Can you point me in his direction?'

Forrester sighed. ' Her Her direction. Fresh out of the Academy?' direction. Fresh out of the Academy?'

Cwej's smile widened. Forrester felt nauseous. n.o.body had a right to be that cheerful.

'No, I graduated last year. I've been on traffic patrol over in s.p.a.ceport Nine Overcity ever since.'

'Of course you have,' Forrester said, looking around for Ras.h.i.+d's raft. 'I've got to see the Adjudicator Secular myself. Follow me.'

'Thanks. 'Preciate it.'

'Don't mention it,' Forrester snarled. This boy was going to get on her nerves pretty d.a.m.n fast.

15.

Bernice was sitting on the floor of the TARDIS boot cupboard when the Doctor found her. From the doorway, all he could see was her cross-legged form in the far distance, illuminated by a single beam of light. As he stepped inside the room, however, he realized that the shadows around her were filled with row upon row of shoes and boots, arranged in concentric circles, like a waiting audience. Burnished highlights shone back from cracked leather.

Bernice did not appear to have noticed him.

He picked his way cautiously through the boots, noticing step by step old friends whom he had thought lost for ever. There were the elastic-sided pair inside which he had hidden the TARDIS key when he was in the Ash-bridge Cottage Hospital. Next to them were the green rubber waders that he'd splashed about the marshes of Delta III in. Over to one side he saw the brogues that he'd been wearing when Kellman had electrified the floor of his room on Nerva Beacon. The heels were still charred. He smiled. Portrait of the Doctor as a collector of shoes. Time considered as a collection of worn-out footwear.

Clearing a s.p.a.ce, he sat beside Bernice. She was holding a tumbler of some amber fluid and gazing out across the sea of attentive boots. She had an old rag across her lap and a pair of Roman sandals beside her.

'Some people might think,' she said suddenly, startling him, 'that possessing several thousand pairs of shoes, boots and sandals indicated an obsessive personality.'

'Nonsense,' he replied. 'Do you know how long I've lived? Over a millennium. Do you know how much footwear I've got through in that time? A lot.

A lot more than a lot.'

'A mega-lot,' Bernice muttered.

'Yes, a mega '

The Doctor trailed off into silence. Mega. A word he had not thought about for some time. Quite deliberately.

'Quite a few,' he finished lamely.

'They don't look worn out to me,' Bernice said.

'Fas.h.i.+ons change. Opinions alter. Location must be taken into account.

What looks good in the light of a red giant sun can cause severe embarra.s.sment on a planet circling a white dwarf. What one race might consider to be footwear fit for the G.o.ds might cause another to call for the fas.h.i.+on police.'

He reached out and snared a pair of bright green shoes with orange spats.

Bernice winced when she saw them.

'Take these . . . ' the Doctor started.

'No thanks!'

'I used to love these, once upon a body. Nowadays I wouldn't be seen dead in them.'16.

He caught Bernice's sideways glance at the brushed suede shoes that he was wearing, and s.h.i.+fted his position slightly so that he was sitting on them. They sat in silence for a few moments, gazing out towards the sketchy shapes of the roundels in the shadows. Eventually, more to break the silence than for any other reason, the Doctor reached out and took the tumbler from Bernice's hand. ' Lch'thy-li Lch'thy-li!' he said, and gulped the liquid down.

'”Lch'thy-li”?' She looked at him strangely.

'Berberese for ”Here's blood on your horns”.'

'Oh.' She shrugged, still eyeing him as if he had done something completely bizarre. 'Well, the feeling's mutual, I'm sure.'

The Doctor knew that human emotions weren't his strong point, but he took the plunge anyway. 'There's something wrong, isn't there?' he said.

'And they said you were insensitive,' she murmured.

'Who said?'

'n.o.body. I was joking.'

'Would a holiday help?' His eyes gleamed.

'No thanks! Your holidays are more dangerous than your deliberate adventures.'

He smiled, remembering some of his holidays. 'Did I ever tell you about the time I had a tooth removed in the Old West?'

'Yes,' Bernice said levelly.

'Oh. What about the effervescent oceans of Florana?'

'Yes.'

'Oh. What about ' He saw her face, and stopped.

'Doctor,' she blurted suddenly, 'Homeless Forsaken told me something just before he died something that's been worrying me. He said I shouldn't go back to Earth for the next few years. He said it wasn't safe that something terrible was going to happen and he didn't want it to happen to me.' She sighed. 'He said even though the Hith are notorious for being loners, he liked me too much to want to see me die.'

'Earth,' the Doctor mused. 'Thirtieth century in Homeless Forsaken's time.

A time of peace and prosperity: well, for the peaceful and prosperous, at least.

Run by the full panoply of an Imperial Court earls, viscounts and the rest and divided up into areas called s.p.a.ceports. Just like the old countries, except that they better reflect the socio-economic realities of life in the future. Not a pleasant place, as places go, but I wouldn't want to lose it just yet.' He was silent for a moment. 'Does this have anything to do with our adventures on Oolis?' he said finally.