Part 54 (1/2)
”When I thought all the property was mine, I refused him. Then, when the property became his, he asked me again, and I accepted him.
Sometimes, when I think of that, I feel so ashamed of myself, that I hardly dare to hold up my head.”
”But you did not accept him simply because you had lost your money.”
”No; but it looks so like it; does it not? And of course he must think that I did so.”
”I am quite sure he thinks nothing of the kind. But he did ask you, and you did accept him?”
”Oh, yes.”
”And since that, has he ever said anything to you to signify that the match should be broken off?”
”The very day after he had asked me, Mr Maguire came to the Cedars and saw me, and Lady Ball was there too. And he was very false, and told my aunt things that were altogether untrue. He said that--that I had promised to marry him, and Lady Ball believed him.”
”But did Mr Ball believe him?”
”My aunt said all that she could against me, and when John spoke to me the next day, it was clear that he was very angry with me.”
”But did he believe you or Mr Maguire when you told him that Mr Maguire's story was a falsehood from beginning to end?”
”But it was not a falsehood from beginning to end. That's where I have been so very, very unfortunate; and perhaps I ought to say, as I don't want to hide anything from you, so very, very wrong. The man did ask me to marry him, and I had given him no answer.”
”Had you thought of accepting him?”
”I had not thought about that at all, when he came to me. So I told him that I would consider it all, and that he must come again.”
”And he came again.”
”Then my brother's illness occurred, and I went to London. After that Mr Maguire wrote to me two or three times, and I refused him in the plainest language that I could use. I told him that I had lost all my fortune, and then I was sure that there would be an end of any trouble from him; but he came to the Cedars on purpose to do me all this injury; and now he has put all these stories about me into the newspapers, how can I think that any man would like to make me his wife? I have no right to be surprised that Lady Ball should be so eager against it.”
”But did Mr Ball believe you when you told him the story?”
”I think he did believe me.”
”And what did he say?”
Margaret did not answer at once, but sat with her fingers up among her hair upon her brow:
”I am trying to think what were his words,” she said, ”but I cannot remember. I spoke more than he did. He said that I should have told him about Mr Maguire, and I tried to explain to him that there had been no time to do so. Then I said that he could leave me if he liked.”
”And what did he answer?”
”If I remember rightly, he made no answer. He left me saying that he would see me again the next day. But the next day I went away.
I would not remain in the house with Lady Ball after what she had believed about me. She took that other man's part against me, and therefore I went away.”
”Did he say anything as to your going?”
”He begged me to stay, but I would not stay. I thought it was all over then. I regarded him as being quite free from any engagement, and myself as being free from any necessity of obeying him. And it was all over. I had no right to think anything else.”