Part 3 (2/2)

When, on the other hand, I look at my cap, my s.h.i.+rt, and on all the fine things before me, and hear the beautiful music, I'll be hanged if I can get it into my head that it's me. No, it isn't me. I am a scoundrel a thousand times if it's me! But I wonder if I am dreaming. It doesn't seem so. I'll try to pinch my arm; if it doesn't hurt, then I dream; if it hurts, then I don't dream.--Yes, I felt it, I am awake; to be sure I am awake; no one can deny that. Because if I were not awake I could not--but how can I be awake when I stop to think? It cannot fail then that I am Jeppe on the Hill; I certainly know that I am a poor peasant, a serf, a rascal, a scoundrel, a hungry maggot, a poor worm! But how can I at the same time be king and lord of the castle? No, it must be only a dream. Therefore, it is best to have patience till I wake up. (The music is again heard and Jeppe begins to cry.) Ah! But can a person hear such things in his sleep? That is impossible! But if it is a dream, then I wish that I may never wake up again, and if I am mad, then may I never become sane; for I should sue the doctor who cured me and curse him who woke me up. But I neither dream nor am mad, for I can remember my whole life. I remember that my sainted father was Niels on the Hill, my grandfather, Jeppe on the Hill, my wife's name is Nille, her switch, Master Erik, my sons, Hans, Christopher and Niels. But see! Now I know: it is the other life, it is paradise, it is heaven! I must have drunk too much yesterday at Jakob Skomager's, died and immediately come to heaven. Death cannot be so awful as they would make one believe, since I didn't even feel it. Now, perhaps, Herr Jesper is standing this minute in the pulpit making a funeral sermon over my body and saying: Such was the end of Jeppe on the Hill; he lived like a soldier and died like a soldier. Of course, one might question whether I died on land or sea, since I went out of the world pretty well soaked. Ah, Jeppe, this is something different from going four miles to town to buy soap, from lying on straw and from getting whipped by your wife. Ah! To what bliss have not your suffering and dark days been transformed? Ah! I must weep from joy when I think that this has come to me through no merit of my own. But one thing comes to my mind: I am so thirsty that my lips are nearly parched. If I should wish myself alive again, it would be only that I might get a mug of beer to quench my thirst; for what good does all this glory do me when I must die again of thirst? I remember the preacher has often said that one neither hungers nor thirsts in heaven and further that one finds there all his deceased friends. But I am nearly dying from thirst. I am also quite alone; I don't see a soul. I ought to find my grandfather at least, who was such a decent person that he never left a s.h.i.+lling of debt to his landlord. Of course, I know that many people have lived just as decent lives as I have, why, then, should I alone come to heaven? Therefore, it can't be heaven. But what can it be? I am not asleep, I am not awake; I am not dead, I am not alive; I am not crazy, I am not sane; I am Jeppe on the Hill, I am not Jeppe on the Hill; I am poor, I am rich; I am a poor peasant, I am a king. Ah!--Ah!--Ah! Help! Help! Help!

(At the great commotion several people come in who in the meantime have stood by, watching to see how he would act.)

Scene 2.

Valet. A lackey. Jeppe.

=Valet=--I wish your lords.h.i.+p a hearty good morning! Here's a gown if your lords.h.i.+p wishes to arise. Erik, fetch a towel and a wash basin.

=Jeppe=--Ah, my wors.h.i.+pful valet! I should be glad to arise, but I beg of you that you do not hurt me.

=Valet=--The Lord deliver me from doing your lords.h.i.+p any harm!

=Jeppe=--Ah, before you kill me, will you not do me the favor to tell me who I am?

=Valet=--Does not my lord know who he is?

=Jeppe=--Yesterday I was Jeppe on the Hill, but to-day--ah, I hardly know what to say!

=Valet=--We are glad to see that your lords.h.i.+p is in such good humor to-day, that you are pleased to jest; but heaven defend us, why does your lords.h.i.+p weep?

=Jeppe=--I am not your lords.h.i.+p. I can make my oath that I am not; for so far as I can remember I am Jeppe Nielsen on the Hill, one of the Baron's peasants. If you will send for my wife you shall find it out; but don't let her take Master Erik along.

=Erik, lackey=--This is strange. What can it be? Your lords.h.i.+p cannot be awake, since you never used to jest in this way.

=Jeppe=--Whether I am awake or not I cannot say; but one thing I can say and that is that I am one of the Baron's peasants who is called Jeppe on the Hill, and I have never been either Baron or Count in my life.

=Valet=--Erik, what can that be? I am afraid that his lords.h.i.+p is suffering from some strange disease.

=Erik=--I imagine that he is walking in his sleep, since it frequently happens that people arise, dress, eat and drink in their sleep.

=Valet=--No, Erik, I perceive that his lords.h.i.+p is delirious. Go and fetch a doctor immediately. Ah, your lords.h.i.+p, put all such thoughts away; your lords.h.i.+p is frightening the whole house. Does your lords.h.i.+p not know me?

=Jeppe=--I don't know myself; how can I then know you?

=Valet=--Ah, is it possible that I should hear such words from the lips of my gracious lord, and see him in such a pitiable condition? Ah, our unfortunate house, which must be plagued by such sorcery! Can my lord not remember what he did yesterday when he was out on the hunt?

=Jeppe=--I have never been either hunter or poacher in my life; you know that is work which may send you to prison! Never shall any soul be able to prove that I have ever hunted a hare on the lord's estate!

=Valet=--Ah, gracious lord, I was with you on the hunt myself yesterday.

=Jeppe=--Yesterday I sat at Jakob Skomager's and drank up twelve pence worth of whiskey. How could I then have been on a hunt?

=Valet=--Ah, I implore my gracious lord on my knees that he do not indulge in such talk. Erik, were the doctors sent for?

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