Part 20 (1/2)
”I don't think so.”
”Are you in love with him?”
Lexi was quiet. ”I'm attracted to him. He makes me laugh. They always say you should marry a man who makes you laugh.”
”Have you talked about marriage?”
”Ha. Are you kidding? Jesse has trouble committing to dinner.”
”He was always that way,” Clare said.
”So I know I can't count on him,” Lexi mused. ”But I've got my parents.”
Clare took a deep breath. ”And you've got me.” She wrapped an arm around Lexi. ”I can't say it's going to be easy for me, Lexi. I've wanted Jesse's baby for years. A baby, a sweet little baby, with white-blond hair and blue eyes. And you've got it. No matter what else happens in my life, you'll have Jesse's baby. And I just don't know how gracious I'm going to be able to be about it. So give me some time, okay?”
”We've got time,” Lexi said.
THIRTY-EIGHT.
Some August days shone like pure gold. On those days the humidity lifted just a little, so that the sky was clearer, the air purer, and everyone was in a better mood. The merchants were swelling their bank accounts, foreseeing a pleasant, even lavish, winter ahead. They'd be able to take their families to Costa Rica for school vacation, perhaps even add that second bathroom. The inst.i.tutions-the library, historical a.s.sociation, science museum-found their coffers filling as relaxed billionaires happily presented checks and started endowment funds in their names. Blue, red, and white sails zipped across the horizon during the day, and at night the island's restaurants were all booked, table after table of rested, tanned, happy patrons enjoying the ruby tomatoes from Moors End and Bartlett's Farm, or the delicate perfection of rococo desserts.
As Labor Day grew closer, more women crowded into Moon Sh.e.l.l Beach, wanting to buy souvenirs of their summer, wanting to take some of the radiance of Lexi's clothing home with them, like taking a suitcase full of glittering sun into the coming fall.
Lexi's morning was too busy for thought. At noon, there was a lull. ”Oksana, I've got to go to the bank. And I'll bring back some lunch. Want anything?”
Oksana was in a cubicle, gathering clothing. She emerged, drawing aside the curtain. ”Some noodles from Even Keel and an iced coffee. Thanks.”
As Lexi walked past the boat basin and up Main Street, she felt better, not so nauseous, and stronger. The sun on her shoulders relaxed her. She knew she looked great in her cocoa slip dress and beaded sandals. Could she trust her stomach to accept a nice big iced chocolate coffee? That might clear her brain. She might be able to think more than an hour into the future. She might be able to clear up her confusion about Jesse.
”Hi, Lexi,” Mimi called from the bookstore.
Smiling, Lexi waved back. She was home, after all. She'd been in worse places in her life, that was for sure. She could be optimistic.
Someone grabbed her shoulder-hard. Someone yanked her so that she spun sideways, nearly losing her balance.
”I need to talk to you.” Bonnie Frost stood there, looking strained. Stuffed into his little backpack, her son gnawed on his fist, grizzling and drooling, red-faced, rashy.
”Hi, Bonnie! Hi, baby!” Lexi put her finger up to stroke the baby, but Bonnie jerked away from her as if she were poison.
Bonnie's face was dark with anger. ”I thought I made it clear I want you to stop visiting Jewel on the pier!”
Lexi took a deep breath and tried to keep her tone placating. ”Look, Bonnie. I'm not making her sit there. I'm not encouraging her. I'm just keeping Jewel company. She seems so lonely.”
”Don't you dare tell me about my own child! You have no idea what is best for her. I'm her mother. I know what's going on in her mind, and I'm worried sick!”
Bonnie didn't seem to be aware that she was shouting. Pa.s.sing shoppers stifled embarra.s.sed grins and some just stopped on the sidewalk, frankly staring at the two women as if they were another of Nantucket's entertainments.
”Bonnie, let's sit down.” Lexi put her hand on the other woman's arm, intending to lead her to one of the wooden benches.
Bonnie jerked herself away. ”Take your hands off me! And listen. I'm not kidding! I'm going to go to court and get you served with a restraining order if you don't stay away from Jewel.”
Lexi was appalled. ”Bonnie, that's way over the top! I'm not hurting Jewel.”
”You're giving her hope that her father's alive!”
”Well, maybe he is!” Lexi shot back. ”Maybe he's not conveniently dead just because you want him to be.”
Bonnie slapped Lexi hard on the face.
Lexi gasped. Her hand flew to her cheek as sudden tears sprang into her eyes.
”You have no right to judge me,” Bonnie hissed. ”I'm trying to protect Jewel from getting her heart broken worse than it already is. You have no right to encourage her to hope for the impossible!”
Lexi was hyperaware now, as if she were both in her body and outside it, looking down at herself with her bright red cheek and Bonnie with her angry face and the sidewalk crammed with people gawking with concern and delight.
She was aware of Bonnie's baby grabbing Bonnie's hair and trying to get it in his mouth.
She was aware of her own baby, floating peacefully in her belly.
”Bonnie,” she said very quietly, ”sometimes it's okay to believe in the impossible. Sometimes miracles happen.”
”Don't be such a fool,” Bonnie snapped. ”Tris is dead, and I'm telling you once and for all, you crazy b.i.t.c.h, leave my daughter alone.” She strode away.
By late afternoon everyone in town had heard about Bonnie Frost slapping Lexi. People took sides, arguing over the phone, over drinks, over dinner. Some thought Lexi was meddling in matters she should leave alone. Others thought Bonnie had been neglecting Jewel ever since she started her affair with Ken Frost, and it was a good thing someone was paying attention to the child.
As Clare waited on customers and settled chocolates into their ruffled paper cups and rang up sales, she overheard people gossiping, but she didn't join in. Lexi, it seemed to Clare, was not doing anything wrong. Jewel was a good kid, too precocious for her own good, and obviously an independent thinker, a bit of a loner-someone Clare and Lexi would have hung out with if they were all the same age. All Bonnie and Ken thought about was money, and more money. Clare sympathized with Jewel, and with Lexi.
Then she remembered that Lexi was pregnant with Jesse's child and a lightning bolt of jealousy speared through her. Maybe the baby would be a little girl like Lexi. Or a boy who looked just like Jesse. She squeezed her eyes shut, warding off the pain. Not now. Not now. She had to work. Thank goodness for work.
THIRTY-NINE.
This Sunday morning with its heavy fug of humidity had an almost Louisiana lethargy about it. The harbor was as still and flat as a sheet of gla.s.s and few boats had their sails up.
Lexi turned the air conditioners onto high. Heat made her drowsy, and the cool dryness seemed to alleviate the worst of the nausea. She'd thrown up that morning, and now her stomach growled hungrily.
She strolled around the shop, straightening and double checking her inventory. A frantic customer rushed in and bought ten small boxes for party favors. A man came in to buy a necklace his girlfriend had admired, and while Lexi wrapped it in a gift box, five women off a tour boat cl.u.s.tered in, chattering and b.u.mping into the display cases, lifting shawls and skirts and letting them fall. Lexi glanced at her watch. Where was Oksana?
Finally all the customers were gone. Lexi wondered if she had time to rush upstairs to grab a peach.